Transition issues | Imamother

Chippies

Thu, Aug 05 2010, 1:43 pm

We just moved to a new house, BH, and overall, my 20 month old has adapted well. The only issue is going to bed. He looks around his room, and looks scared. For nap time, he just cries a little, but he'll go down eventually without too much fuss. For bedtime, however, he screams and screams and for 3 nights in a row, he screamed so much that he threw up each time. I'm feeding him dinner earlier now so that at least there is less to throw up, but that's obviously not the ideal answer. The moment we turn off the lights, his heart beats a little faster and he looks scared. We've tried spending more time in his room, sometimes with the lights off and we play and read. It's not working, though. Between the extended bedtime routine and the vomit and the cleanup and the additional extended bedtime routine, he's going to bed about 1.5 hours later than usual and he's exhausted.

Any suggestions?

Chippies

Fri, Aug 06 2010, 7:32 am

Any advice? He made himself throw up again last night. It was much less this time and not as much crying either, but now we're worried that he's developing this habit of forcing himself to throw up when bedtime approaches because he knows it will delay bedtime slightly. Has anyone been through something like this before with their kids?

pinkbubbles

Fri, Aug 06 2010, 8:03 am

what do you do, turn off the lights and close the door? do you go back in at all? do you make noise outside so he knows his parents are there or do you stay quiet?

we just moved and ds was afraid too. he got used to his room eventually, but we had to work on it. I do his bedtime routine the same way every night, and he gets about an hour of time with me before getting in bed. if he cries we go back in every few minutes and after a few times we'll call out to him and let him know we are here and that its sleep time. we make noise downstairs or upstairs (nothing crazy, but I'll clean up, walk around, DH and I talk, I'll be on the phone, whatever) and he understands that we are close by. if need be I go in again later on. I don't stay in his room for long and we are boring during sleep time. there is a small night light in his room and the door is kept open until he falls asleep, then its partly open.

Chippies

Fri, Aug 06 2010, 1:07 pm

He has a blankie that he loves which brings him comfort, but even so, he's scared of going to bed.

We tried to keep our routine the same as it was before we moved. We read a couple of books, we sing songs then we do the shema and put him to bed. The only difference now is that we're spending more time in his room before that routine starts. He's generally fine within 10 seconds after we close the door. I don't hear him anymore. Whenever I check back to see if he's ok (not something I used to do, but now I'm a little paranoid about him), he's always either sleeping or just hanging out quietly as he sucks his fingers and cuddles his blankie. So I still keep the lights off without a nightlight and the door closed. We sometimes walk around and make minimal noise and sometimes don't. It hasn't made a difference because the problem is actually putting him down in his bed. He screams, clings onto me and throws up. The first night that he threw up I think was just the result of screaming right after drinking a lot of milk and eating a full dinner. But now, I'm pretty sure he's doing it on purpose to stay up a little longer.

We'll see what tonight brings. Hopefully he'll stop vomiting!