Which is worse? | Imamother

ChossidMom

Sun, Sep 05 2010, 1:30 pm

I didn't get married till I was 31. When I was still an older single, one of my good friends was going through many years of infertility. I remember once we had this weird conversation where we were kind of comparing our problems. I thought my problem was the "preferable" one because maybe I would get married AND have kids. She thought I was the "miskena" because at least she had a husband to share her life with. (In short, we both preferred our own "pekel").

Funny how I remember this convo. BTW she had a baby after 12 years of marriage. A year before she gave birth her husband and her were at my house for Shabbos on Pesach and when they left, my husband shook his hand and said (rather boldly) "Next year you'll come to us with your son" shock

I couldn't believe he said that!!

P.S. Pesach one year later they made a bris for their son!

OP, I feel for you and bless you that this coming year should be a very, very fruitful year for you in every way!!! שה' ימלא כל משלאלות לבכם לטובה

ChossidMom

Sun, Sep 05 2010, 1:50 pm

I dunno. The guy's like a rebbe with kvitlach.
Once I was visiting my boss who had a brain tumor. He was in sad shape in a wheelchair and as we were leaving, I was waiting for my husband to echo my brochos that he should have a full recovery. My husband said NOTHING. It really bothered me. A week later the guy was niftar. What

It's really weird. KWIM?

Sorry for the hijack. embarrassed

life'sgreat

Sun, Sep 05 2010, 8:29 pm

Regarding the IF vs older single, I felt the same way your friend did. Having someone to share the pain with is IMO, easier than having the pain in loneliness.