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Forum
-> Relationships
-> Manners & Etiquette
chocolate moose
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Thu, Aug 24 2006, 12:25 pm
I have a lot of older, single friends....in ther 50's,..and want to be known as "Chaya" or "Batya", not Mrs. Rotfl or Dr. Whoosis.
I'm not tha comfortable withit.am I old-fashifoned?
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Ruchel
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Thu, Aug 24 2006, 12:40 pm
I always find it weird in the beginning, but I get used to it...
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jewgal84
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Thu, Aug 24 2006, 1:59 pm
Unless they are a Rebbetzin, or of higher authority, ie boss: Shliach etc, I find know problem adressing ppl by their names.
Being called Mrs. so and so, or Ms. or whatever can make some one feel old! (50 is not old )
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Annie
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Thu, Aug 24 2006, 2:36 pm
DH and I had a HUGE discussion about this when the kids were little. We also live in an area with a lot of young married couples, many of whom have kids the same age as mine. Our "convention" so to speak is that its Mr & Mrs. XYZ. If they say something (which many of the young couples do) then if they have kids it's "Asher's Mommy." If they don't have kids I usually ask if my kids could please call them by their more formal names (and then I mention that DH is from the South and his family is very formal).
For other friends of mine who are not married, or who are very close to my kids, they become "Aunt Susie" or "Tanta Chava." We tried the Miss Jane approach (my husband's suggestion), and it didn't work for me. I also have one friend who is also a teacher at the kids school, so she's "Morah Rivki" even though they don't have her as an official "Morah."
Because of the way my family is (I'm the youngest by A LOT), my kids have first cousins old enough to be their parents. We always insert "Cousin" as a semi-official title.
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amother
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Thu, Aug 24 2006, 2:42 pm
funny I've been wondering the same thing. having just newly moved to a community where the rebbetzin is somewhere in her high thirties (YOUNG!) -- but I'm 25 - do I call her Mrs. Cohen? Or Chana Cohen? Or Rebbetzin Cohen? --Rebbetzin is VERY old sounding...
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Annie
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Thu, Aug 24 2006, 4:41 pm
When I've been in a community with a Rebbetzin who was young, and younger than me, she asked all of us to please call her by her first name.
Even the Rebbetzin in my community now is called by her first name by most of the time, which is still weird for me. I just try and avoid addressing her directly LOL.
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chen
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Fri, Aug 25 2006, 6:58 am
The safest thing is to refer to someone as Mrs. Nochamol or Rebbetzin Nochamol unless and until she tells you "Please call me Melinda." When and if she does so, do as she asks. (Though I admit I have a neighbor who is quite a bit older than I who has asked me to call her by her first name, and I just can't do it! When speaking of her I refer to her as Mrs. Glicklich, but when I speak to her I don't call her anything.)
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