my 1 year old's private part is too closed? help!

amother

Sun, Sep 11 2011, 7:41 pm

Op here-

wow, thanks you guys for all the responses.

1) I really really don't want to switch pediatricians. I have been through alot with this dr, and he is very very good. He has a relationship with me and goes beyond the call of duty. Just for example- I brought my baby (then 2-3 mos old) in to the office for something minor- I think it was a diaper rash or cold or something, and saw the PA (I had no problem with seeing the PA over the dr at all), that night was bedikas chometz and I got a call at 10:45pm from the dr saying exactly the following: "I saw you today in the office, I'm sorry that you had to see the PA- is everything ok?" I was blown away!
Yes, I find that this dr can be rough, and not so gentle- but he has really led me through alot, and I don't want to start with someone new that doesnt know my kids as well as he does. It's a real toss up because roughness can be really hard- but he does it with good intentions- for example- when he gives shots, he holds 2-3 of them together (like holding a bunch of pens) and does them together- so they should only get hurt twice- you might say its crazy but I thought that was compassionate. Another roughness thing he does is always looks in my babys mouth to see if any teeth are halfway out, if they are, he presses the gums and forces them out- he says, they cry now but its one pain and thats it instead of hours and days of pain until the tooth finally comes all the way out.
I would love to hear some opinions on this situation- does gentleness overrule any other qualities?
Another thing about him is that he is very very cautious- I really like that- he isnt the type to just say "I'm sure its nothing"- I always prefer to be safe than sorry.

2) My baby doesnt seem to be in pain when she urinates- and the hole (and scar) is at the bottom of the private part, so I don't think she will have trouble.

3) the hole is far from being closed, my dr just said it should be open more- so can I assume based on all your comments that as long as it is open, I should leave it alone?

4) I am really really freaked out about "scarring" my baby for life. She flinches now and starts jumping away when I am changing her diaper- should I not even look at the area any more, let alone hold it open?

5) I can't imagine putting a finger inside the hole- it doesn't seem like there is even room for that - or maybe thats the whole problem here??????

aaahhh!!!!!!!!! I still don't know what to do!!!!!

observer

Sun, Sep 11 2011, 10:06 pm

amother wrote:

Op here-
yes, I find that this dr can be rough, and not so gentle- but he has really led me through alot, and I don't want to start with someone new that doesnt know my kids as well as he does. It's a real toss up because roughness can be really hard- but he does it with good intentions- for example- when he gives shots, he holds 2-3 of them together (like holding a bunch of pens) and does them together- so they should only get hurt twice- you might say its crazy but I thought that was compassionate. Another roughness thing he does is always looks in my babys mouth to see if any teeth are halfway out, if they are, he presses the gums and forces them out- he says, they cry now but its one pain and thats it instead of hours and days of pain until the tooth finally comes all the way out.
I would love to hear some opinions on this situation- does gentleness overrule any other qualities?
Another thing about him is that he is very very cautious- I really like that- he isnt the type to just say "I'm sure its nothing"- I always prefer to be safe than sorry.

If it was me, I would personally rather have the teething pain spread out over hours and days instead of having the teeth forced out with a lot of pain all at once....

Nobody can decide for you about switching doctors, but maybe you can find a doctor that you're comfortable with in all aspects.