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MOTHERS WITH BIG FAMILIES my 2 cents
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bandcm




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Dec 24 2006, 9:32 am
mirikush wrote:
I think they need to bring into the schools 'sock pairing 101' they should teach them that A. size does not necessarily make a pair, B colour does not make a pair c and complete opposites are usually not a pair!! d. when in doubt don't!
I am still finding oddly paired socks till this very day. Confused


I agreed 100% with you post, as I know how crazy it can get with a large family (I belong to one).
I just had one comment - I don´t think it´s the school´s responsibility to teach kids how to pair socks - do you? I think that sort of falls into the category of ``things I learned at my mother´s knee``...
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amother


 

Post Sun, Dec 24 2006, 10:26 am
Quote:
Yet our large families stick out the most and get the most amount of mussar regarding birth control than others regardless as to our own situations. I get comments ranging from 'you're pregnant again!!', ' you must really want another daughter!" 'have you considered taking birth control' and my all time favourite just after #7 was born..."you are going to take some time off and take the pill aren't you" from a virtual stranger in the community.


I can ignore it when it is a virtual stranger, but yesterday my MIL made some remarks to suggest that I had enough kids already. She doesnt know thqt I am probably already two months into my next pregnancy! Her remarks really hurt. Today, she calls me up with more musser, telling how lovely all the kids are but she is sure that Hashem thinks that I've done a good enough job with those I have and I don't need any more shock . This was amongst all the other advice that she had for me - like moving to where my parents live as a "compromize" becuase I told her on Shabbes that I want to move somewhere else and she thinkls that dh doesnt want to move there and its too expensive. And how I should keep the house looking neat and tidy for dh (I wanst even tidy when I was single, let alone with a houseful of kids! AaARAGGHHHHHHHHHHH. AND even more frustraiting is htat I know she really only means the best for us and cares for us which is why she wants to help Confused Confused shock Mad Confused
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mirikush




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Dec 24 2006, 6:51 pm
Quote:
I agreed 100% with you post, as I know how crazy it can get with a large family (I belong to one).
I just had one comment - I don´t think it´s the school´s responsibility to teach kids how to pair socks - do you? I think that sort of falls into the category of ``things I learned at my mother´s knee``...


It was said with tongue in cheek...of course it's not the schools responsability!! They have enough to learn!

Quote:
I can ignore it when it is a virtual stranger, but yesterday my MIL made some remarks to suggest that I had enough kids already. She doesnt know thqt I am probably already two months into my next pregnancy! Her remarks really hurt.


I know how you feel...but I get it from my mum not my mother in law. It is the hardest part of my pregnancy to inform her that I am expecting. I always get a long silence followed by mussar. It takes me weeks to get over this. I didn't tell her until my 18th week because I was so nervous. It took me another 5 weeks to let my father know (theyre divorced) even though I know he is more accepting.
My mum came from a large family where the mother according to her put her feet up whilst the kids did the housework. I am sure it did not happen like this. She says her concerns are for my health although I am sure this is not the case. She just has hangups about almost everything. ie my weight ever since I was 7, what her friends might say...etc etc etc
Confused
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amother


 

Post Sun, Dec 24 2006, 7:45 pm
why dont u tell ure mom...." I dont apprectiate negative feedback and if u keep it up I just wont tell u when im pregnant. ive decieded this is what I want and if I need advice ill ask!"??? dont take it from her.... it must be hard.
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mirikush




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Dec 24 2006, 7:54 pm
Quote:
why dont u tell ure mom...." I dont apprectiate negative feedback and if u keep it up I just wont tell u when im pregnant. ive decieded this is what I want and if I need advice ill ask!"??? dont take it from her.... it must be hard.


I actually though very hard about this. But I am her only daughter and she does actually love all her grandchildren especially the only granddaughter. (once they arrive...it's just the initial announcement that is really painful and the 4 months that I need to gather up the courage to tell her!!)
I have told her this is what I want and this is my life. She should be happy that I am happy. That I am not so weirdo daughter into drugs and neglecting my kids etc etc...but she has the hangups and she will never get rid of them. Such is life!! We have to take the bad with the good and smile even if it is hurting.
But now that I have told her life is easy!!...until next time!B"H Very Happy
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