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greenfire




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 20 2014, 4:31 pm
SplitPea wrote:
I wanna turn the a little had my child been watching a video on the iPad and kids crowded around her to see/hear the video would everyone feel the same?


interesting turn of thought ...

personally I would think there's a time and place for videos & this is where I think the ipad modern technology is bordering on evil ... [including parents texting above] you can't stop kids from being curious when they are not deaf ... but manners should always be taught

then again look at all the crazy people who cannot get out of being preoccupied with their phones - that too is rude

on the other hand - perhaps if the doctor's office would have a large screen - the kids would all be behaving ... I've been to offices like that & it makes more sense
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Ashrei




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 20 2014, 4:44 pm
I would also take offense to the behavior of the other parents, especially with your loud and clear hints. I would have been explicit and asked specific parents, "Could you please watch your child, I'm just reading this book for my daughter alone." I know it sounds mean, but I guess I'm a little confrontational... (If the kids weren't sick, I probably wouldn't have minded.)

I don't get the iPad thing, I'm not sure what the difference is... if sick kids are surrounding your not-sick kid, it's a problem and their parents should take responsibility.
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33055




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 20 2014, 4:52 pm
SplitPea wrote:
It's not my problem that every other mother was on her phone or texting and not paying attention to their child. There is a Stack of children's books they are more than able to put down their phone and interact with their child themselves


You made it your problem by creating the attraction. Reading a story is as alluring to your neighbor's child as it is to your child. It is not reasonable to expect young children not to want to participate also.

These mothers might be on their phone trying to earn their parnosa and balance their daily responsibilities with dealing with a sick child. I wouldn't assume they are entertaining themselves on the phone.
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33055




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 20 2014, 5:00 pm
SplitPea wrote:
I wanna turn the a little had my child been watching a video on the iPad and kids crowded around her to see/hear the video would everyone feel the same?


You also create the same attraction by having a video. I don't like it either, but you can't expect the children not to be envious. My children have learned not to expect any privacy when they are playing with their DSs. A video world attract even more attention.
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black sheep




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 20 2014, 5:24 pm
Some parents don't want to parent their children, and don't teach them manners. For those mothers, hints don't work. I would have said loudly enough for the mother to hear "excuse me, please move back, you are too close and you are invading our personal space!"
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SplitPea




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 20 2014, 6:03 pm
Squishy wrote:
You made it your problem by creating the attraction. Reading a story is as alluring to your neighbor's child as it is to your child. It is not reasonable to expect young children not to want to participate also.

These mothers might be on their phone trying to earn their parnosa and balance their daily responsibilities with dealing with a sick child. I wouldn't assume they are entertaining themselves on the phone.


So I have my hyperactive autistic child in a drs office for an infected cut. I don't want her playing with the other children who all look very ill, I can't read her a book, she can't watch a video. ( Those two you say its wrong to exprct the children atay away) How do I keep her near me, calm and away from the sick children in the waiting room? Should I just ask the feverish snotty about to throw up child to my left to sneeze on her and get it over with?
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imasinger




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 20 2014, 6:25 pm
I give my hyperactive, autistic kid my cellphone to play games on in the waiting room.

But if I were in your situation, I would probably respond like the teacher that I am. After the first hint fell flat, I'd brightly say to the other little listeners, "I'm glad you all will share a story time! My rule is that everyone has to make a large space bubble at the doctor's office, so that we can try not to share germs. You sit here, you sit there, etc. Now, I'll hold it upso everyone can see. Can you all hear me? Once upon a time..."
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33055




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 20 2014, 6:28 pm
SplitPea wrote:
So I have my hyperactive autistic child in a drs office for an infected cut. I don't want her playing with the other children who all look very ill, I can't read her a book, she can't watch a video. ( Those two you say its wrong to exprct the children atay away) How do I keep her near me, calm and away from the sick children in the waiting room? Should I just ask the feverish snotty about to throw up child to my left to sneeze on her and get it over with?


Your expectations are not realistic when it comes to children rather than they are morally wrong.

I would tell the Dr to give you the first available appointment before other children arrive. Pediatricians have protocols in place for children who can't be near other children because of compromised immune systems. Perhaps these same considerations can be given to your child because of her special needs. Your child could be scheduled with the infants for instance if the first available is not an option.
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SplitPea




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 20 2014, 6:30 pm
Squishy wrote:
Your expectations are not realistic when it comes to children rather than they are morally wrong.

I would tell the Dr to give you the first available appointment before other children arrive. Pediatricians have protocols in place for children who can't be near other children because of compromised immune systems. Perhaps these same considerations can be given to your child because of her special needs. Your child could be scheduled with the infants for instance if the first available is not an option.


For a Sunday chol ha moed appointment in a one dr office who has only two exam rooms? I will remember to schedule my child to get infected cuts at a time when making an appointment is with no one else around.

And as for special needs how would you keep ANY 3 year old child away from other children at a drs office if in your world you can't expect privacy giving them an iPad, or reading a story? She should just sit on her hands and twiddle her toes?
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Talya




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 20 2014, 6:37 pm
SplitPea wrote:
So I have my hyperactive autistic child in a drs office for an infected cut. I don't want her playing with the other children who all look very ill, I can't read her a book, she can't watch a video. ( Those two you say its wrong to exprct the children atay away) How do I keep her near me, calm and away from the sick children in the waiting room? Should I just ask the feverish snotty about to throw up child to my left to sneeze on her and get it over with?

Chat with her? Or get over the germs. It's not ideal but there's not much you can do.
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MaBelleVie




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 20 2014, 6:42 pm
Another option may be to let the receptionist know you'll be waiting right outside/ in the hallway. I've done that before when I've had a sick kid but didn't want him to be exposed to all the yuckiness in the waiting room (my ped has a well waiting room and a sick one, but if it's crowded I don't like being in the sick room).
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33055




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 20 2014, 7:21 pm
SplitPea wrote:
For a Sunday chol ha moed appointment in a one dr office who has only two exam rooms? I will remember to schedule my child to get infected cuts at a time when making an appointment is with no one else around.

And as for special needs how would you keep ANY 3 year old child away from other children at a drs office if in your world you can't expect privacy giving them an iPad, or reading a story? She should just sit on her hands and twiddle her toes?


My child had a compromised immune system so unfortunately I am aware these protocols exist for pediatricians and pediatric specialists. I would assume this situation exists for every pediatrician appointment you have with your daughter rather than just today. I was hoping this would be a long term solution for you. Someone must be the first appointment even on Chol ha moed Sunday. My pediatrician was a solo practitioner with 2 exam rooms.

Perhaps I am not coming across as sympathetic to you as I am. I thought changing the scheduling would be easier because changing everyone else is too tough.

I also like Imasinger's idea of the bubble. In my current community the children (and adults) are not taught the etiquette one would wish. Adults who are not taught the proper respect in turn are not installing it in their children and demanding their children have manners.

Refuse Shelimah for your daughter and good yontiff.
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5*Mom




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Apr 21 2014, 2:56 pm
Yes, if I were a parent in the waiting room, my sick child would be sitting next to me. And yes, those other parents should have done the same. But it is so far from being the big, huge deal you are making it out to be. Greenfire and imasinger both gave you good, ADULT ways of dealing with the situation with, you know, a bit of compassion for a few sick children - and their probably overwhelmed, overworked, overtired parents. I am really floored at the childish self-centeredness of an adult who can't bring herself to share a story with a few pitiful sick children at the doctor's office.
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abound




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Apr 21 2014, 6:26 pm
It may have been better if the parents told their kids to go away, but I think it is not the worst thing that happened.
Also in the future, telling your child loudly- go away from the sick kids etc etc is not an effective way of communicating to other adults. Talk to them in a nice direct way, that would go much further than loudly telling your child to move, Also if you are going to tell your child to move away from a different child, chances are that the child will not understand and get insulted that you are asking your child to stay far away.
I hope your daughter did not catch anything and you have a healthy summer!
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