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-> Parenting our children
-> Our Challenging Children (gifted, ADHD, sensitive, defiant)
amother
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 Thu, May 08 2014, 2:16 pm
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I don't know what to do, my son is so defiant, doesn't listen to anything I say. Ran out the house to a neighbour and ignored me even though I went out and called him back numerous times. He makes me so mad I just end up seething and scream at him which makes him worse. He's typical ODD. I'm at my wits end. He's so hard to love, we have a terrible relationship.
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octopus
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Thu, May 08 2014, 2:26 pm
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take a deep breath. you can do this. sometimes when a child is so, so, so challenging, you need to take a step back and breathe a little. yes, acknowledge this child is difficult. and he will still continue to be difficult. focus on positive interactions. Even if your negative interactions continue try to "equalize" it by making more positive ones too. do something special with this child on a weekly basis. When we do positive things together, it creates positive feelings toward eachother. I find that when my kids get super annoying, taking a break away from them doesn't help me. I have to do something I enjoy with them and it helps me see them as delightful instead of frustrating.
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amother
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Thu, May 08 2014, 2:42 pm
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Read the book 'The Explosive Child'. It'll help you deal with him more effectively.
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amother
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Thu, May 08 2014, 3:28 pm
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thanks for all the advice. I've read the book and found the strategies great for when he's having a meltdown but sometimes its just pure defiance, him thinking he can do what he wants. what am I meant to do when he's run a few houses down and ignoring me? he just pushes all my buttons, drains me of all my energies. I'm so embarassed of myself! when I think about it I must look like a tantruming toddler when I shout at him! I know how I should respond, I just get so annoyed I lose control......
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