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Tznius song
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Sanguine




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jun 17 2014, 1:09 pm
amother wrote:
not quite what you are looking for but this is what we used to sing when we were..umm...younger

tznius what have you done to me?
tznius, no one will marry me,
tznius, cover your knee-es, your sholders your knees and your toes! Tongue Out Twisted Evil


That's the second verse to Tznius- it is our battle cry...
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PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jun 17 2014, 3:27 pm
Sanguine wrote:
That's the second verse to Tznius- it is our battle cry...


Wow, the hidden verse!
'In the mid Atlantic, circa the 60s and 70s the nusach was
Tznius, it is our battle cry
Tznius, it's either do or die*
Tznius
Don't show your kneeus, or your feet or your ankles or thigh igh igh ighs.


*In my mind's ear there's a missing two syllables in that line. I'll assume it's "either" as per Seraph.
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Sanguine




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jun 17 2014, 10:39 pm
PinkFridge wrote:
Wow, the hidden verse!
'In the mid Atlantic, circa the 60s and 70s the nusach was
Tznius, it is our battle cry
Tznius, it's either do or die*
Tznius
Don't show your kneeus, or your feet or your ankles or thigh igh igh ighs.


*In my mind's ear there's a missing two syllables in that line. I'll assume it's "either" as per Seraph.

I think the debate here is the very last line that goes in both verses. We sang it

Tznius don't show your knee-us,

Or your elbows or shoulders or thighs

Maybe it depended on what you actually showed. I showed my feet and ankles and not my shoulders or thighs. I had heard elbows or ankles but assumed it was a mistake. Elbows or shoulders made sense. But actually, I did show my elbows but that was OK cause it was our interpretation of ultra-orthodox which this song was (we sang more "we must, we must, we must increase our bust...")
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PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 18 2014, 4:47 am
Sanguine wrote:
I think the debate here is the very last line that goes in both verses. We sang it

Tznius don't show your knee-us,

Or your elbows or shoulders or thighs

Maybe it depended on what you actually showed. I showed my feet and ankles and not my shoulders or thighs. I had heard elbows or ankles but assumed it was a mistake. Elbows or shoulders made sense. But actually, I did show my elbows but that was OK cause it was our interpretation of ultra-orthodox which this song was (we sang more "we must, we must, we must increase our bust...")


Back in those days I don't know if I was aware of the concept of UO. Sure, there were chassidim (in NY), and someone in my class who didn't have a TV or get a newspaper.
I could be misremembering the last line. If I remember I'll ask my sister.
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Choirmistress




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 18 2014, 7:27 am
The Tzniyus March

Tzniyus -- it's more than modesty.
Tzniyus -- it's a whole way to be.
Tzniyus -- if we're to plea-us
The One Above, and do right in His eyes.

Tzniyus -- it is our battle cry.
Tzniyus -- we raise our standard high.
Tzniyus -- don't show your knee-us.
Don't show your shoulders or elbows or thighs.

CHORUS: Our Law speaks wisely of a truth
Known to women from Sarah to Ruth,
And every generation since
Who has been mother or wife to a prince.* (*Any and every G-d-fearing Jew.)

Tzniyus -- pull down your hem and sleeve.
Tzniyus -- a mitzvah you'll achieve.
Tzniyus -- never go sleeveless.
No low-cut neckline, and no see-through cloth.

Tzniyus -- no women wearing pants.
Tzniyus -- your merit you'll enhance.
Tzniyus -- you'll feel at ea-us,
Like Shabbos guests sipping hot chicken broth.

CHORUS

Tzniyus -- no showing collarbone.
Tzniyus -- it's well and widely known:
Tzniyus -- noone's to see us
In dress or skirt, blouse or shirt that's too tight.

Tzniyus -- no showing outlined shape.
Tzniyus -- all clothes must smoothly drape.
Tzniyus -- it's for the briyus
Of our neshama and doing what's right.

CHORUS

Tzniyus -- mind how you stretch or bend;
Tzniyus -- elbows must not extend,
Tzniyus -- nor must your knee-us.
All four joints must be concealed at all times.

Tzniyus -- no Jewish man may hear
Tzniyus -- a woman's song, far or near,
Tzniyus -- so quiet, plea-us!
There're private places for tunes and for rhymes.

CHORUS

Tzniyus -- just where does one begin?
Tzniyus -- is it from outside in?
Tzniyus -- for us to be us,
Should we not work on our inner selves first?

Tzniyus -- is it a state of mind?
Tzniyus -- can we wake up and find
Tzniyus -- that one called "mee-us"
Is still in much inner beauty immersed?

CHORUS

Tzniyus -- can one put on a soul?
Tzniyus -- does surface change the whole?
Tzniyus -- can garments free us
From looking just at a person's outside?

Tzniyus -- a princess doesn't show
Tzniyus -- what just her prince should know.
Tzniyus -- gives inner pea-us.
It's true: Clothes DO make the man -- or the bride!

CHORUS

Tzniyus -- not just no vanity.
Tzniyus -- good for your sanity.
Tzniyus -- it's a relea-us
From being a slave to the styles of the day.

Tzniyus -- while "their" hems sink then climb,
Tzniyus -- in colors drab to lime,
Tzniyus -- let's just increa-us
The inner yofi that's our Jewish way.

CHORUS

Tzniyus -- will never do you harm;
Tzniyus -- it even keeps you warm.
Tzniyus -- of all idee-us
Has done much to keep our nation preserved.

Tzniyus -- great gems are kept concealed;
Tzniyus -- treasures are not revealed.
Tzniyus -- the real metziyus
Of what's desired is that it's reserved.

CHORUS

Tzniyus -- the Shulchan Aruch said
Tzniyus -- not to let enter our head
Tzniyus -- that noone see-es
What someone does in his room in the dark.

Tzniyus -- a person's core is shown
Tzniyus -- by how she acts "alone".
Tzniyus -- many zechiyus
Are earned by one with a conscience that's shtark.

CHORUS

(Use all parts of the full version's melody. The part performed by horns and not whistled constitutes the "Chorus".)

Enjoy. L'ilui nishmos avi mori hayakar Yoel ben Yehudah Aryeh v'imi morasi hayekarah Sima bas Yitzchok Eizik a"h. All but 5th through 8th lines copyright July 2014 by Hedy Weiss.


Last edited by Choirmistress on Tue, Sep 09 2014, 11:31 am; edited 8 times in total
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PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 18 2014, 7:36 am
Choirmistress, you're amazing!
Before I cut and paste this and send it to some of my nearest and dearest, do you have any idea what was written when, and if possible by whom?
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Choirmistress




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 18 2014, 10:30 am
Thanks for the compliment, PinkFridge.

As I wrote earlier, I would love to be able to find, and credit the right person for, the fifth through eighth lines. Any info on additional existing lyrics would be appreciated. The remainder I wrote before and after the two days of Shavu'os, while visiting a cousin in Lakewood. It needed very little "tweaking" between the handwritten notes and the double-sided letter-size sheet of final typeset version. It almost wrote itself. In fact, I think the hardest rhyme for me to come up with was a different one for each verse to avoid duplication of an "ea-us" ending.

Choirmistress.
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PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 18 2014, 12:11 pm
I'm not clear. Which stanzas did you write?
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Choirmistress




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 18 2014, 12:25 pm
I wrote all but "Tzniyus -- it is our battle cry" through "elbows or shoulders or thighs."

I am thoroughly frustrated by my inability (at least at this point) to read or write sheet music. Locked in my skull with so far no outlet are 19 new tunes to 20 sets of old lyrics (Tehillim, tefillos, and other kisvey kodesh); 9 new lyrics to old tunes; 16 original sets of both tunes and lyrics; 22 or so secular tunes (only about half with lyrics); about 75 singable translations of existing songs; and finally, two others in the same category as this march, "Additions/Embellishments".

Kol toov.
Choirmistress
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PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 18 2014, 12:35 pm
Thanks.
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Choirmistress




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jul 28 2014, 6:05 am
An informal poll:

I've always been bothered by the line "It's either do or die."

And while it may be unfair to the original lyricist, since he/she has yet to be identified, let alone has given any input on this website, please offer your personal choice:

a) keep as is;
b) "We hold our banner high";
c) "We hold our standard high" (a bit of a pun as a standard is a form of physical, literal flag);
d) "We'll always strive and try"; or
e) [Fill in with your own rhyme]

I hope iy"H to tally the responses and, if warranted, adjust my version with yet another amendment to reflect the majority opinion.

Regards to all,
Choirmistress
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oliveoil




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jul 28 2014, 7:55 am
Choirmistress wrote:


And while it may be unfair to the original lyricist, since he/she has yet to be identified, let alone has given any input on this website


It sounds like a camp song, which means it was probably written but a couple of 15-16 year olds who didn't put all that much thought into it as long as it fit the "theme" and rhymed.
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Choirmistress




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jul 28 2014, 9:46 am
oliveoil wrote:
It sounds like a camp song, which means it was probably written but a couple of 15-16 year olds who didn't put all that much thought into it as long as it fit the "theme" and rhymed.


From a camp? Possibly, but I remember first hearing it in B'nos on Shabbos afternoons.

And yes, I'm STILL mystified as to why there are only four lines.

In any case, I'm still waiting for other Forum members to weigh in on alternative wording.

Regards,
Choirmistress
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chatz




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jul 29 2014, 8:44 am
I would change the "do or die". All the options sound good.

And it does sound like what a teenage girl might come up with. Like a cheer, or bunk song, or similar.

Regarding the lyrics in your head - why don't you record yourself (singing, playing, wahtever) and pay someone to transcribe it? Or do it live (would make for better results) with someone. You need someone who can write music who has time and would enjoy the project.
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Choirmistress




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jul 29 2014, 10:40 am
Thanks. I personally like the "standard" choice, but I'll wait for more opinions before changing the electronic version posted here.

As to recording my songs on tape, that would not get any of my songs "out there" any sooner than would waiting to get together with the singing group (I.e., soonest next Lag b'Omer iy"H) to teach them the songs (including harmony) live, and even THAT would depend on their agreeing (by majority vote) to learn them. THEN, as a group, we could sing the songs (including harmony) on a tape, which THEN could be given/sent to someone willing to transcribe them as sheet music.

(Sigh.) I know, it's cumulative, like learning math -- step 2 can't proceed until step 1.

The only other practicable suggestion I've received, from one of the instrumentalists in the group, was that before my year of aveilus is up, I could "preteach" those three or four instrumentalists the melodies and chords, so that they could then accompany my teaching the songs to the group as a whole.

What think the rest of you? I have to fiddle around with my portable (flexible rubber) keyboard to figure out all those chords first!

Regards,
Choirmistress
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Choirmistress




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jul 30 2014, 6:13 am
It occurs to me that it may not be clear to all readers how I have imagined the syllables fitting the melody. Should I indicate the stressed syllables in bold, or would it be too visually distracting? The last thing I want a few months to years down the road is for a bunch of schoolgirls to learn this song, but put the emphasis on the wrong syllable!

Opinions, please.

Regards,
Choirmistress
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