Landlord is imposing a no Internet rule. what to do?

m in Israel

Wed, Jul 30 2014, 1:27 pm

ectomorph wrote:

But you're in the US. In EY it's not "normal" for a family that watches videos to socialize with a family who doesn't. The amount of permitted religious variation within any community is very small, and any hint of not fitting in carries much more severe consequences.

That's my point - being Chareidi in EY is very, very different from being Chareidi in the US, and this story is just a symptom of that.

I would love to live in EY, but I am used to being allowed to pick and choose. I have internet, but not an iphone. I wear bright colors but not red. I am still considered yeshivish. We would not have that flexibility in EY.

I think you should follow the advice of Orchid and not respond if you don't live here. This stereotype of no one in Israel socializing with anyone with any religious variation is true in only a few very specific Israeli enclaves (think Bnai Brak type of communities). In most areas in Israel, even in Yerushalayim, is it just not true. You can socialize with people who are not exactly the same as you. And in American areas this is especially true. We consider ourselves pretty Chareidi, have filtered internet but only kosher phones. We have no problems socializing with people who do have a kosher phone, and are very friendly with people who identify as DL or Chardal as well.

OP, this is definitely NOT a typical request, even in a very Chareidi neighborhood.

I do think it is true that the culture here in general is much less into privacy (people have no problem asking all sorts of personal questions), so as far as a landlord thinking it normal to ask about your personal habits, THAT may in fact be a "welcome to Israel" moment.

debsey

Wed, Jul 30 2014, 1:53 pm

ectomorph wrote:

Agreed. And if religious standards are the ONLY thing upon which to base friendships, then you and I would be perfect friends, since we have similar standards. (for all I know, we are IRL!) and aside from that, I love your posts.
I do love being able to pick and choose and that's why we're not in Israel as well.

cinnamon

Wed, Jul 30 2014, 2:02 pm

m in Israel wrote:

Just had to protect my town's reputation. I've been living in Bnei Brak all my life and though I hear about this problem a lot I have never actually encountered it.
I don't know of anyone who doesn't socialize with me or my kids because of my 'religious variation' and I send to a cheider that is markedly more chreidi then we are.
Maybe I just don't know the right (or wrong?) people...

cityofgold

Wed, Jul 30 2014, 2:11 pm

Cinnamon, it may be a community thing, I'd love to know of a place that was more accepting of American-style chareidi, but I would have to agree that in the chareidi community I live in and in ones I have friends in close by, people will socialize with you but that doesn't mean you'll get into their schools if, for example, you wear nail polish.

But all that doesn't really matter because that is a COMMUNITY standard and not imposed by a landlord. The only time I've ever heard of a landlord getting personal is a single girl I know who wanted to move into an apartment with her boyfriend. They were frum kids, very young, and the landlord refused to let it to them. But that is just a completely different scenario. I think, anyway.

OP, if it's not too personal, do you mind sharing what area you are looking in? If it's nearby me I would be happy to ask around and see if we can help you find a different apartment.

shabri

Wed, Jul 30 2014, 2:31 pm

cityofgold wrote:

Rechavia/Shaarei Chessed

monseychick

Wed, Jul 30 2014, 3:07 pm

grace413 wrote:

I am prejudiced by own personal experience which included the following:

1. Landlord breaking into apartment at 2 am to scare me into leaving ( I was single, living alone). Same landlord had his friends calling my phone at 15 minute intervals from 1 to 6 am.

2. Other landlord did not pay his arnona for many years. I came home one day to a notice on the door that if the arnona was not paid within 3 days the municipality would break into the apartment and remove everything from the apartment (which of course belonged to me, not to the landlord).

Many landlords are fair but many are not. Many standard leases have clauses enabling the landlord to cancel the lease with 2 months notice. And they have many, many ways of making your life miserable if they want you out, so unfortunately, whether something is legal or not is irrelevant.

I can refuse to rent out my apartment to somebody because I don't like the color of their eyes or any other reason. In case people reading this are not aware most rentals here are apartments owned by individuals who don't currently need it. There is no equivalent of US buildings which exist solely for the purpose of being rented out.

Between all this and the wars and the constant terrorist attacks and the 'benefits' of socialism and the inferior commercial products my friends and neighbors are constantly telling me about , it boggles my mind why any makes aliya...
I guess some things I will never understand

shabbatiscoming

Wed, Jul 30 2014, 3:23 pm

monseychick wrote:

For real? First of all, Ora's stories and your friend's stories are not the entire countries stories. Do you think that whatever you hear from one or three people is the entire country?

It boggles your mind why anyone would make aliyah?????? Well, it boggles my mind why anyone would not make aliyah!!!!!! I guess I will never understand.

debsey

Wed, Jul 30 2014, 3:24 pm

monseychick wrote:

shabbatiscoming wrote:

And this is why this topic is NEVER EVER amenable to rational discourse. Just agree to disagree and move on, folks........

Raisin

Wed, Jul 30 2014, 3:31 pm

monseychick wrote:

Outside of many big US cities big rental buildings are not common either. My american relative is constantly being evicted at the whim of her landlords.

Greenbelle

Wed, Jul 30 2014, 6:57 pm

ectomorph wrote:

I would love to make Aliyah, but ironically, its my Israeli husband who doesn't want to... He says that he enjoys our privacy in the US and doesn't want people in our business...
I for one, don't care about that. But I do realize that even tho I may be considered Charedi over here, I would never fit in over there. I have a different world view and I am too out of the box to fit in. On the other hand I don't fit in to an MO community either... so for now we are here...

Maybe you can sign the agreement and then when you get there, you can look for something more suitable; and it might be easier since you are actually there.

amother

Wed, Jul 30 2014, 7:52 pm

It does seem like landlords can impose strange conditions on tenants,
My daughter is moving out of an apartment so she tried to help her landlord find a tenant, well when someone did apply for the flat they were told there are 3 conditions.
No internet.
No long sheitels
Husband must be full time learner!
Well my daughter wears quite a long sheite. her husband works and she has internet on her phone.
The people that wanted the flat thought she was outrageous and told the landlady no thanks.
Mind you when my daughter moved in she was told no Americans cos the last tenant was American. I wonder what other conditions she will find to impose on future tenants! Rolling Eyes

Ps. Anonymous because quite a few ppl know the story!

debsey

Wed, Jul 30 2014, 10:02 pm

amother wrote:

Ps. Anonymous because quite a few ppl know the story!

I don't get it! What if you start out in kollel being supported or wife is working, and she loses her job, and dad loses his money and husband becomes a rebbe? Do you have to move out that day????
I lived in a house and the landlord kept warning us he's gonna want it for his son. I couldn't wait to move out because it felt like waiting for the other shoe to drop!
Other things are more in your control. You move in wearing a short sheitel, if you choose to buy a long one, you made a choice. But some things in life are not in your control!
It sounds so weird to me. But maybe this is a cultural thing........Like Orchid says, only ppl living in Israel get what the situation is with this.

Peanut2

Wed, Jul 30 2014, 11:05 pm

Raisin wrote:

Outside of many big US cities big rental buildings are not common either. My american relative is constantly being evicted at the whim of her landlords.

Where do you get that from? There are apartment buildings and apartment villages in all sorts of small towns you've never even heard of. You can even google that.

And it's not so easy to be evicted 'on a whim." If it's happening to her all the time...

DrMom

Thu, Jul 31 2014, 2:47 am

I've lived in Israel for 10-20 years, and neither I nor my friends have never encountered a landlord who demanded anything w.r.t smartphone usage, internet usage, tznius, sheitel absence/presence/length, etc. All my landlord asked was prompt rent payment, and to keep the place in good condition.

Sorry, monseychick -- you'll have to think of some better reason to justify staying in the Galut.

shabbatiscoming

Thu, Jul 31 2014, 2:51 am

DrMom wrote:

Same here. Ive been here almost 12 years and have never encountered such a thing. Ever. And Ive lived in a lot of rentals, 7 to be exact.

Raisin

Thu, Jul 31 2014, 1:06 pm

Peanut2 wrote:

Maybe it is unique to her location. I don't know. But she has had to move quite a few times over about twelve years. She has a big family so needs a house. Maybe you can find long term apartments but not houses.