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Forum -> Parenting our children -> Preschoolers
Can I just keep him inside the rest of the summer?



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amother


 

Post Thu, Jul 31 2014, 5:11 pm
I am so tired already of spending hours outdoors with my 3 year old. I hate everything about summer- the sun, the heat, the bugs- and if I had my way, I would lock myself in a dark air conditioned room till it over. I get very depressed in the summer. I am also tired of ds antics. He doesn't listen and then pitches a fit when it's time to go in and I have to put the baby in a playpen to scream while I drag ds kicking an screaming inside. And then he keeps trying to drag chairs over to open the door and go back out. He doesn't like the sound of the ac and cried to turn it off, which I simply can't do or I will lost what shred of sanity I have left. Today he threw dirt 3 times after being repeatedly warned not to and then dumped a large bucket of dirt on the baby so I dragged them inside and I just gave them a bath and it's still stuck in the baby's hair which I've shampooed twice. I've had it- I can't deal with another month of this garbage. Can I just ban outdoor play for the rest of the summer???
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amother


 

Post Thu, Jul 31 2014, 5:37 pm
I've had similar issues in the past.

If it was me, I would handle the situation by telling DS that we aren't going to play outside until he shows that he can behave appropriately and then explaining what constitutes appropriate behavior (no throwing sand, coming inside when play time is over, etc.)

This will only work if you stick to it. I often see mothers at the park tell their children "If you don't do X then Y." The kids who roll their eyes are invariably the kids who continue to do X with increasingly harsh warnings... only to have Y never materialize. The kids whose behavior improves immediately are the children who know that if they continue to misbehave, Y will follow.
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bnm




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jul 31 2014, 5:54 pm
can you hire someone to take him to the park for an hour? does he go to a daycamp for a few hours? I like taking my kids to the park and letting them run around, I find a shady spot for myself or get a little damp with the sprinklers. I hate heat and some days I do tell them its too hot to go outside. other days we do water fights.
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causemommysaid




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jul 31 2014, 6:06 pm
I also hate the heat and bugs.

If I could, I would do away with summer and winter and have half a year of spring, half a year of fall.

my solution:

I have membership at a local museum. They have a kids center. I can go as often as I like and its cool and air conditioned.

The kids can run around and go crazy in the indoor center while I sit and watch.

That way they get out and play and I don't die of heat.

(I do still have to spend time outdoors though and I hate every second of it)

oh- my kids are in camp so they get plenty of outdoor time with their counselors who are 15 and have lots more energy than tired old me
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ra_mom




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jul 31 2014, 6:13 pm
If he's out during the day in a day camp and getting fresh air some parts during the day, you can be in at other times.
Watch DVDs one day, take a long play bath another, color and read books, then go to a small gated park where it's easy to sit and keep track of your child once or twice a week. It's hard running after the kids all day, every day, outside in the summer!
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mummiedearest




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jul 31 2014, 6:25 pm
don't keep him inside. plan ahead: create a schedule that involves some indoor activities as well as limited outdoor play. indoor activities: public library (find out if there are programs for toddlers), museums, fun kid-friendly stores (yes, toys r us is a fun trip, and you can actually spend little to no money), the laundromat (toddlers love watching the clothing spin), grandparents, a local florist shop, a local pet shop, any store where they demonstrate how they make something (I'm thinking chocolate now, but there may be other things), farmers markets, bookstores, craft stores (see if they have craft activities). take baby with you in a stroller and go.

outdoor activities: tricycle around the block, park, swim/sprinkler, hopscotch, ball, kiddie roller skates, chalk, running to specified spots and running back. limit these to one hour, early morning or late afternoon. have exciting in-house activities to motivate him to go in without a fight.

at-home activities: baking cookies, shaving cream in the bathtub, painting, play-doh (put a disposable plastic tablecloth on the floor, let him sit on it in nothing but a diaper. easy clean-up, no ruined clothing), cooking supper with mommy, bean and rice tub (again, on the plastic tablecloth on the floor), finger painting, arts-n-crafts, corn starch solution (this is just corn starch and water. kids love it. they'll splatter it all over, but you can let it dry completely and just sweep/vacuum it up. totally worth the 1-2 hours they'll spend making a mess), melon kebabs, etc.

so here's the script:

you: ds, we're going out to play for one hour. we're going to the park. and you know what we're going to do afterwords? we're going to do a super exciting activity! so first we'll have fun in the park, then when mommy says it's time to go, you have to go super fast so we can do an extra special thing together after. it's going to be SO MUCH FUN!!! (seriously, pile on the enthusiasm.)

ds: yay!

throughout the hour in the park, remind your ds: half and hour left/15 minutes/10 minutes/5 minutes till we go home for our super special activity!!! (keep the enthusiasm up, it'll be infectious. and do repeat yourself at least five times throughout the hour. if he sees you're excited to do something with him, he'll look forward to it.)

when you get home, don't plop on the couch. have the necessary items out and ready so that you can get him started immediately. if you have the plastic tablecloth ready to be spread and the cornstarch waiting for you, you can easily pour the cornstarch in a bowl and add some water until it's slightly runny, set him up in your desired spot, and tell him that you'll be back in a few minutes if he needs any help. go sit down, nurse the baby if you have to, have an icy drink, and breathe. give him five minutes, then go in and spend at least a few minutes making a mess with him. he'll enjoy it even more, and you will too. sitting on the floor and running your hands through messy things can be so relaxing. excuse yourself once in a while when you need a break, but just tell him you have a little bit of work to do. don't tell him you need a break. if you do, he may decide to take a break too. you'll be fine.

but yes, you should get outside every day for an hour. if you can't do more than that, don't. but being outdoors is good for all of you. just have a plan ready, you'll enjoy the whole summer much more.
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amother


 

Post Thu, Jul 31 2014, 6:52 pm
Op here. He already goes to camp. This is in the afternoon after he gets home. I can't drive so we can't go anywhere interesting. Also, he is usually very well-behaved and listens EXCEPT when he's running around outside, then he suddenly gets very daring and defiant.
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mummiedearest




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jul 31 2014, 6:54 pm
amother wrote:
Op here. He already goes to camp. This is in the afternoon after he gets home. I can't drive so we can't go anywhere interesting. Also, he is usually very well-behaved and listens EXCEPT when he's running around outside, then he suddenly gets very daring and defiant.


he's in camp? keep him inside, by all means.

btw, I don't know where you live, but I don't drive either. there's public transportation or feet. do some googling, you might actually be able to go places closer to home.
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amother


 

Post Thu, Jul 31 2014, 7:04 pm
We are not in the city. We used to be and it was fine, I walked everywhere. I thought getting my license would be a snap, but it hasn't been. Nothing good within 2 miles and no normal public transportation. I'm going nuts because I can't go anywhere.
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mummiedearest




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jul 31 2014, 7:33 pm
sorry, amother. I'm sure that's really tough Sad
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bnm




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jul 31 2014, 7:42 pm
make sure he is drinking enough and eating enough. and yes, you can keep him inside if he is already going out to daycamp.
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mha3484




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jul 31 2014, 7:57 pm
I am by no means an expert in child development but your comment about the a/c making him cry stood out to me. You should think of how you will manage that if you are going to stay in all afternoon.
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sneakermom




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jul 31 2014, 8:32 pm
He is acting out outside because you feel more uptight outside and maybe it's becoming a power struggle.

I would keep outside play a half hour and then use an incentive to go in. Also I would try not to notice every little thing he does that irks me outside. Point out good behaviors and give him his space to play and get dirty!

What would capture his interest indoors? A bath with toys sand bubbles? A sink with toys and bubbles? Paint? Art? Story time? Building toys? Clay? Cars? Sand tray? Etc.

You made it halfway through the summer. Just one more month to go.

Good luck!!
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ValleyMom




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jul 31 2014, 9:26 pm
Is there really a city with no public transportation?

That aside... can you make playdates and be inside someone else's home for a bit?
Or have a friend pick you up and take you with them on their outings? Not EVERY afternoon but even once a week.

Honestly, a full day of day camp is generally enough for a 3 year old, maybe he is simply over tired and isn't capable of expressing that what he really needs is to wind down...

Get some super cool bath toys and let him play in the tub with bubble bath for as long as he wants as a way to cool down. This is a great way to get a sweaty boy clean--and clean the bathroom floor too! Yes, you will have to do some heavy wiping but he will be clean and tired...

Just some thoughts, and my last one... Please speak with your pediatrician and share with him that your son has a low tolerance for the loud hum of the air conditioner.
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oliveoil




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jul 31 2014, 9:42 pm
mummiedearest wrote:
he's in camp? keep him inside, by all means.



You'd be surprised how little outdoor time some camps have.
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