how to positively encourage my kids to daven

amother

Fri, Aug 22 2014, 10:14 am

I have an 11 and 12 1/2 year old son, they are bh both pretty good kids, but when it comes to davening..... it's a different story.
My 11 year old came home with his third term report card at the end of school year and the rebbe wrote: chaim is a good kid, but doesn't daven with the class!!!
we are in the country, so every day I tell them they have to daven before they go outside, it literally takes them 2 minutes (sometimes less!) shemona esrei,is like a 15 second ordeal!
I know it's not good to pressure them to daven, so I don't and let it go, but it really bothers me!
On shabbos, they go to shul, but play outside, and my husband has to beg them to come in for kedusha etc...
My almost bar mitzvah boy, has a friend over for the week, I can't believe the difference! he actually takes a siddur, and really says the words!
I would love to positively encourage my sons to daven, but don't know how, they are getting older, and it's starting to bother me a lot.
advice and tips please!

amother

Fri, Aug 22 2014, 10:31 am

DH once told me his mother used to give him a dollar when he got up to daven with minyan.

DH NEVER misses minyan as an adult, so it definitely had the effect.

amother

Fri, Aug 22 2014, 10:41 am

Thank you for posting this. I am in the same position. My ds is 11 and has zero interest in davening. I got a similar comment on the report card!
I am waiting for some good suggestions!

(to be fair and completely honest, my dh is not into davening either) embarrassed

deams

Fri, Aug 22 2014, 11:43 am

Is it hard for your boys to read hebrew? I know for me it was and still is. My father used to tell me to choose a part of davening and read that paragraph nice and slow. When u get good and that add another part. Better to say a small part right than to not daven at all/ saying the words wrong.

amother

Fri, Aug 22 2014, 12:09 pm

deams wrote:

no, they learn peirush hamilim in school

amother

Fri, Aug 22 2014, 1:08 pm

Bribe them. It works. I know it's not PC but it worked on my boys. Say to them I want to say amein so say just brachos iut loud for me. Eventually they daven on their own. Don't pressure them just say there's a dollar for you when you finish davening but you have to give it to them in the beginning even if it's speed davening. Also make sure they see you davening.