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Fist Bump



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Dina_B613




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Aug 25 2014, 2:15 pm
What is the halachic status of a fist bump? Is it like shaking hands? I gave a man the fist bump the other day because my hands were dirty instead of shaking his hand (we had a laugh about it).
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PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Aug 25 2014, 2:27 pm
How about an air fist bump?
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JoyInTheMorning




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Aug 25 2014, 2:44 pm
Good point, PF! It's probably easier to give an air fist bump than an air handshake.

However, I shake hands with men but don't fist bump. The reason is that shaking hands is an established and accepted mode of interaction in the business world. So I do it too. But fist bumps are not established and accepted in the business world, so I just don't do them. I am sufficiently uncool that if someone were to do the initial fist bump action and I do not reciprocate, it would be assumed that I just didn't realize that I was supposed to participate in the fist bump ritual.

And of course, if fist bumps become accepted and commonplace, I'll do them too.
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naturalmom5




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Aug 25 2014, 5:25 pm
In my circles it's a guy thing so if a guy gives you the fist bump he is saying you aren't lady - like
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vintagebknyc




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Aug 25 2014, 5:27 pm
naturalmom5 wrote:
In my circles it's a guy thing so if a guy gives you the fist bump he is saying you aren't lady - like


this is one of the most ridiculous things I have ever read.
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debsey




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Aug 25 2014, 6:57 pm
Why not ask a shayla and find out for sure?
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PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Aug 25 2014, 8:15 pm
Dina_B613 wrote:
What is the halachic status of a fist bump? Is it like shaking hands? I gave a man the fist bump the other day because my hands were dirty instead of shaking his hand (we had a laugh about it).


Is fist bumping becoming de riguer in the business world? I know it's not uncommon to shake hands for business purposes because it's clearly not socializing. Do people fist bump because of hygiene?
Honestly I'm not too familiar with the phenomenon and it's shorashim. I always thought it was more like a high five.
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FranticFrummie




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Aug 25 2014, 9:43 pm
vintagebknyc wrote:
this is one of the most ridiculous things I have ever read.


A fist bump is considered a "guy thing". It's like saying "Yeah, bro!"

There are things you can say as affirmation that are the verbal equivalent. "Good one!", "Two points!", "Right on!" are all acceptable. There's no need for physical contact to show that you agree with something.
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vintagebknyc




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Aug 25 2014, 10:37 pm
FranticFrummie wrote:
A fist bump is considered a "guy thing". It's like saying "Yeah, bro!"

There are things you can say as affirmation that are the verbal equivalent. "Good one!", "Two points!", "Right on!" are all acceptable. There's no need for physical contact to show that you agree with something.


it's not a "guy thing" in my world, it's not unlike a high five. and it does not mean you're not "lady-like."
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zaq




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Aug 25 2014, 11:11 pm
I read an article in a respected medical forum in which a physician suggests subbing fist bumps for handshakes because the back of the hand touches fewer surfaces and presumably carries fewer germs. Well-meant, but pointless. Why perpetuate, even in modified form, a medieval practice that was meant to show that one carried no weapons? Why not substitute a gesture or words that require no physical contact?
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bigsis144




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Aug 25 2014, 11:18 pm
PinkFridge wrote:
Is fist bumping becoming de riguer in the business world? I know it's not uncommon to shake hands for business purposes because it's clearly not socializing. Do people fist bump because of hygiene?
Honestly I'm not too familiar with the phenomenon and it's shorashim. I always thought it was more like a high five.


I think a fist bump is way more informal than a handshake, and for that reason would avoid them, so as not to act in an overly familiar way with an unrelated male.

A non-frum male cousin and I "air fist bump" because he has a sense of humor about my being shomer negiah, and I'm more lax about inter-gender formality with relatives.

All this talk of fist bumping makes me think of my eldest son. My almost 5-year-old and I have a high-five-and-fist-bump ritual that we do when I drop him off at school or camp Very Happy


Last edited by bigsis144 on Tue, Aug 26 2014, 8:15 am; edited 1 time in total
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Dina_B613




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 26 2014, 1:32 am
I'm not strictly shomer negiah, so I don't feel like I need to ask a shayla, but I'm wondering if this could be "acceptable" for some frum people who won't shake hands because there is significantly less contact. I gave someone the fist bump in a very casual, non-business, setting.

I personally don't like handshakes because you get someone else's germs and often have to feel their clammy palms. I'd honestly prefer not to touch others who I don't know...
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perquacky




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 26 2014, 8:44 am
I love this thread--it gave me my first good laugh of the day!

I too am not strictly shomeret negiah, and would shake hands with a colleague, but a fist bump at the office? Only with someone I've known for a while. Not with someone I'm meeting for the first time. It's a friendly, familiar gesture, and definitely not professional.
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PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 26 2014, 8:53 am
I am shomeres negiah (and if anyone wants to report that, feel free to Tongue Out ) and my understanding is that there's social physical contact, which is a form of affection or attachment, and other physical contact, like helping someone up who fell. Some poskim hold that business hand shaking falls in the latter category and are matir it. (It could be that they tell the individual it's bedieved, try to get out of it, I have no idea.)

Now I must tell you I can't quote chapter and verse, it's just the principle I was taught to be able to exercise judgment when presented with the latter possibility. We all know the chasid shoteh who lets the woman drown example.

As such, since fist bumps are clearly social gestures, this imamother rabbi would pasken to...CYLOR.
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sky




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 26 2014, 9:32 am
I don't shake hands at work with men.
Recently I was introduced to a new co-worker. He tried to shake my hand, and I explained I don't shake hands. So he started to fist bump. I also did but stopped a few inches from his fist. He said "I'm not menstruating or anything". I guess he was saying he thought I thought he was impure?
[Some of my co-workers I have been working with for years have these different "fake" handshakes they do with me. sometimes I think those may be more of an issue then shaking hands because it is an inside joke]
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monseychick




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 26 2014, 10:33 am
Sky, no offense , just friendly advice... Take it from someone with lots of real world experience..

What you are describing sounds like a good way to create bad feelings , aka "not a team player"

And be first on line when there are layoffs and downsizing...

I hope you know what you're doing...

Also, making a whole production of air handshakes and fake fist bumps actually creates a closer emotional bond than a very informal quick handshake..

JMHO....
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sky




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 26 2014, 3:48 pm
I've been working in the corporate world for almost 15 years.

I"ve been with my current company many years and I've survived many lay offs b'h; I'm constantly holding my breath. (they just laid off about 30% of the company 2 weeks ago - with almost no obvious rhyme or reason, some of the best were let go - some with skills much better and more valuable then my own - its a company in a very volatile market that has huge ups and downs determined by gov't laws).

So far with Hashem's help I've survived there through nissim. I can only continue doing there what I believe is correct. I know they respect me for it and I've got a great and friendly rapport with everyone there (its mainly a male dominated field, I work with almost no females).
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gittelchana




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 26 2014, 4:28 pm
Dina_B613 wrote:
What is the halachic status of a fist bump? Is it like shaking hands? I gave a man the fist bump the other day because my hands were dirty instead of shaking his hand (we had a laugh about it).


I would imagine that it's like shaking hands. Those who allow the former would probably allow the latter. Those who don't touch, don't fist bump either.

I personally think a fist bump is very impersonal. I try not to do it even with fellow women.
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zaq




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 26 2014, 4:36 pm
bigsis144 wrote:
My almost 5-year-old and I have a high-five-and-fist-bump ritual that we do when I drop him off at school or camp Very Happy


Aww, that's adorable!
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zaq




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 26 2014, 4:41 pm
I view a fist bump as a kind of "way-to-go, mate" gesture between friends or teammates, like a mutual thumbs-up, not a "pleased to make your acquaintance" or "it's a deal" gesture. It's street language, not office language, and I would be very taken aback if someone tried to do this in a business environment.
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