Start cheder in september or after sukkos?

amother

Tue, Sep 02 2014, 3:31 pm

My son is turning 3 after chanuka this year. I registered him for cheder already. He was in playgroup last year and at the same place throughout the summer. I just had a baby this week so he isnt home. I felt better having him continue at the playgroup where he was till now, even with the week break we had, so that he has less confusion, more continuity/stability at a time when things might be a bit confusing for him, not being home, new baby... I just spoke to the principal to let her know that he will start cheder after sukkos and she was trying to convince me to start now-all the kids are starting now, by the time he joins they will know the routines, know where everything is, such as the bathroom, classroom, how to go to the bus... Now she is getting me confused. Is it really better to start him now?
She also said that even if he starts after sukkos I should try to have someone bring him to orientaion tomorrow so he can be introduced to the building, classroom...
What are your thoughts?

busydev

Tue, Sep 02 2014, 3:38 pm

I would have him start with the other kids too.

I know that you want to keep things stable for him- I had the same dilemma last year (had a baby the first week of school) but it was definitely better for him to be new with everyone else.)

Dev80

Tue, Sep 02 2014, 4:08 pm

I see both sides, what the above posters said about starting on time but I also see your side to keep him in a familiar surrounding with all these other changes going on.
Kids this age are pretty resilient, so either way he'll probably be okay and not TOO traumatized.

Also after succos will probably be a bit of a transition for all the kids coming back to cheder because they'll have been out, off schedule, surrounded by family for two weeks so he may not be at a big disadvantage.

I really see both sides and I just wanted to chime in to say that if you do keep him in the playgroup I don't think he'll be too traumatized also you can talk up cheder that when he's a big boy after succos he can start etc etc. You also have to know your kid, how does he do in new situations? Does he make friends easily? Will be adjust to a bigger class okay? Is he excited about the idea of going on the bus?

miami85

Tue, Sep 02 2014, 6:05 pm

I can hear your apprehension of wanting to wait, but I don't really see much advantage of waiting TOO much longer. Right now your house is in "new baby" mode--which has chaos in itself. If your son gets TOO comfortable in his current routine he might be even more defiant about switching. I can hear waiting a week or so until you maybe feel a little bit back to yourself--and also he'll miss out on the other criers at school but I wouldn't wait until after yom tov--that's a whole month and a half away. Most 3 year-olds acclimate within 2-3 weeks (3 is usually extreme cases).

amother

Tue, Sep 02 2014, 6:23 pm

Dev80 wrote:

OP here:
The bolded part is basically what I figured. That since there are so many breaks in tishrei, with a fairly long one at the end for sukkos, there is anyway a new transition period after sukkos so starting him then is probably not such a big disadvantage.
I guess now I am rethinking.
He isnt really toilet trained tho, as hard as I tried it just didnt go.
I thinkni will ask the teacher what she thinks. She taught my other son so I know she is really good and will have good advice for me.

miami85

Tue, Sep 02 2014, 6:27 pm

amother wrote:

I think you will have it either way, but 3 year-olds usually get over it pretty fast--but you have to know your kid. Does the school require him to be toilet trained? Many 3 year-olds arent ready need to be more like 3.5