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Forum
-> Relationships
-> Simcha Section
amother
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Tue, Nov 25 2014, 10:51 am
What gifts are given to the chosson during his engagement? I am told that people are not buying gold watches anymore because gold is very expensive. Is that true? I want to do what is right.
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Iymnok
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Tue, Nov 25 2014, 11:52 am
What does he want?. A watch that he'll never use? A shas that is too big and fancy to be useable? A menorah bigger than his window?
We took my DH to the watch store. After a couple years of not using out I got him a nice simple one for Chanukah. He still likes it a few years later.
Giving gifts is meant to send the message 'we are so happy that you're joining our family'. Start off with good communication.
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amother
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Tue, Nov 25 2014, 12:56 pm
The gifts probably depend on your circle. I have heard in the yeshivish circles of watches, menoras*, shas, kiddish cups, esrog box*, diamond cufflinks, tallis (Shabbos and weekday), tallis bag and kittel. Most people will not get the chosson ALL of these. These are just common options (or at least ones that I heard of).
Personally, I got my husband a silver menorah (and a talis and kittel). It is big but it is not the size of the window When I told him what he was getting, he said that he would probably use his menorah more than his watch!!! He loves his menorah!
If you want to get a watch, I don't think it has to be gold (but maybe double check). I think it can be whatever is in style and/or what the chosson likes. But make sure to ask him. Lots of guys don't like the watch.
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Ruchel
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Wed, Nov 26 2014, 7:30 am
Many get nothing, many kallos get only (!) engagement ring.
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MaBelleVie
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Wed, Nov 26 2014, 7:34 am
Whatever you do, let him choose! Nothing worse than knowing someone spent a lot of money on a gift you don't like. If you want to get a watch you can let him know your budget and let him decide what he wants to do with it. I bought my husband a watch when we were engaged and we had fun shopping for it together
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amother
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Wed, Nov 26 2014, 8:30 am
I am amother from above. Totally agree w/ MBV. Let him choose the expensive stuff! My husband had a few choices of menorahs and he picked the one he liked. I am not sure if at the point, I would've been able to guess which one he would like. You can surprise him w/ little inexpensive things. The yr. I got married, my home city one the World Series (and it's a big baseball city), so I bought my chosson a World Series t-shirt at Marshalls!
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