The Good and the Bad

amother

Wed, Nov 26 2014, 4:26 pm

I think we discussed the story here (I know I discussed it A LOT in real life, but hey, some of us can't necessarily keep the two straight, KWIM?).

Do you remember how long ago it appeared? Because now I realized I should have saved it and written a letter to the editor, but I don't know if it's 4 weeks, 8 weeks etc. And which magazine!

Reminder: women married around 15 years attend a shiur from their old kallah teacher. She asks them before the shiur to write what bothers them most about their husband. At the end she gives them a copy of what they wrote as kallos re: what was most special about their husbands.

Hint: it was the same basic thing, in each case. One was very dignified but turned out to be so closed emotionally. One was so positive and happy but couldn't hear any problems his wife had & just brushed them aside. One was such a giving, people person, and then when his wife just had a baby, he brought home all sorts of people and gave away her SIL's potato kugel.

And I was sure it was written by a man. Because in each case, the husbands were so WRONG!

But DD (who's a kallah teacher) gave me a good perspective on it. In each case, by remembering what she so admired in her chassan, the woman could now have good communcation and say "I admire X about you so much. And that's why, when you do Y, I totally understand why you do it. The thing is, I need Z." Do you agree?