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Better to not daven at all or daven immodestly dressed?
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FranticFrummie




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jul 14 2014, 6:42 pm
OP, I really, REALLY respect you for wanting to work on this. People who don't struggle with certain mitzvot have no way of understanding how hard it can be for those of us who do. Some women get migraines from covering their hair. Others get panic attacks about going to the mikvah, or keeping hakaros. None of this makes you a bad person, or a bad Jew.

These struggles are here for our GOOD, so that we can overcome them and build ourselves up. Try keeping a snood and a light cotton housecoat near your siddur, and see if you can manage to wear them just while davening. It might actually be easier than you think.

I totally hear you about the lack of air conditioning! Is there any chance you can find a cheap window unit to help you out? (even a small fan might make a big difference) I would be beyond miserable without my AC, even though it just makes a tiny bit of difference in the heat.

Hug {{{cool hugs}}}
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amother


 

Post Mon, Jul 14 2014, 7:32 pm
Follow these steps in order, until you get used to them.

Step #1: Daven. It doesn't matter what you're wearing. It may not be ideal, but does not invalidate your tefillah. (If you daven stark naked, your private area must be covered, at least by your sitting position.)

Step #2: Think about your davening.

Step #3: Possibly make some effort to dress for the occasion of davening.

Step #4: Come to a place of comfort with dress and davening.

It is a very beautiful thing to daven when dressed for the King, but it is a very ugly thing when someone doesn't show up for a close relative's wedding because they can't find the right dress.

Hashem would rather you in your PJs than not at all.
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amother


 

Post Mon, Jul 14 2014, 8:35 pm
ra_mom wrote:
You're allowed to make a Bracha fully undressed with just your privates covered, I don't know if davening I'd any different.


Don't you have to wash your hands if you touch a part that is usually covered? How would a person daven when undressed? Keep their hands away from their body?
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Ruchel




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jul 15 2014, 6:40 am
amother wrote:
Don't you have to wash your hands if you touch a part that is usually covered? How would a person daven when undressed? Keep their hands away from their body?


Do you constantly touch yourself, especially in davening?
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frimamom




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Oct 13 2014, 11:05 am
I learned that if it is just you, then you can daven if your top and bottom are covered. Nothing else has to be covered
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Iymnok




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Oct 13 2014, 11:25 am
A close fitting band separating the Reva from the heart. A bra or waistband of pants or underwear works. The Reva should not "see" the heart, hence the problem wth sitting uncovered. (Men would have the issue standing too) If you are wearing a t-shirt and pj pants you are fine. Being married it's better to cover your hair. Do like pp said, keep a tichel by your siddur.
Hashem loves your Tefillia and your mesiras nefesh for it.
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myself




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Oct 13 2014, 4:02 pm
The bare minimum would be covering down below.
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ra_mom




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Oct 13 2014, 5:07 pm
amother wrote:
Don't you have to wash your hands if you touch a part that is usually covered? How would a person daven when undressed? Keep their hands away from their body?
I do not know. I don't do this. But it can totally be done,.
I have made a Bracha with just the minimum at the pool, etc.
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amother


 

Post Sun, Dec 14 2014, 1:15 pm
Iymnok wrote:
A close fitting band separating the Reva from the heart. A bra or waistband of pants or underwear works. The Reva should not "see" the heart, hence the problem wth sitting uncovered. (Men would have the issue standing too) If you are wearing a t-shirt and pj pants you are fine. Being married it's better to cover your hair. Do like pp said, keep a tichel by your siddur.
Hashem loves your Tefillia and your mesiras nefesh for it.


Very visual explanation. I can really see what you mean. Thanks.
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bezrasHashem1




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Dec 14 2014, 3:32 pm
I admire your dedication to halacha. Ask your Rav. Remember that with this post you are reaching wonderful Jewish women who cover a wide spectrum of religious observance. (As is clear from the varied responses....
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faigie




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Dec 14 2014, 4:17 pm
You do daven in the mikvah, and there ya aint got nothing on.
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amother


 

Post Sun, Dec 14 2014, 4:25 pm
faigie wrote:
You do daven in the mikvah, and there ya aint got nothing on.


Finally, thank you.

Some of the times I've needed to daven most were times I've found myself sobbing in my tub or shower. (I always try to use a warm tub or hot shower to relieve stress, not all that crazy.) If I had to get out, get dressed and daven, I'd just want to crawl into bed. Hashem loves us no matter what we're wearing, at least the Hashem I believe in.
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Volunteer




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Dec 14 2014, 4:38 pm
Yes, I think some of the most sincere tefillot a woman will ever say occur when she is not fully dressed (in the mikva, while giving birth, while breastfeeding, in the bathroom, etc...). Of course Hashem pays attention to your tefillot no matter what. Whoever said otherwise is fool.

I learned that a woman is allowed to separate challah with a bracha while nude, as long as she is sitting cross-legged on the floor (so her private parts are covered by her legs and the floor). Not that I would recommend this practice for hygienic reasons.

I think the whole separation between your heart and private parts only applies to men, but I could be wrong. The problem with seeing nudity during tefillah is about men seeing an undressed woman and getting distracted, not about how you are dressed when you are praying alone.
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2gether




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Dec 15 2014, 7:22 am
amother wrote:
I heard in lecture that when hashem doesn't answer your tefillos, it's because you're not dresses modestly. You are standing in front of hashem.


amother wrote:
This is NOT what I needed to hear now. I already mentioned in the op that davening is a huge struggle.
Rebbitzen please do tell me why even when I davened 100% dressed Hashem still didnt send the yeshuah?????


I was happy to see this thread again, I wanted to post, and couldn't find it.
I think the lecturerer meant that not dressing modestly blocks your tefilos,as in ושב מאחוריך "vishav meiachorecha", but has nothing to do with how you daven privately at home.
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Chana Miriam S




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Dec 15 2014, 6:06 pm
I was taught to Daven after dunking buck naked in the mikvah. ML always leaves and gives me time to do so. I focus better and have more jacana there than anywhere else. I figure if that's ok, then hS doesn't care if I am in at shirt and shorts in my house
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