How rude is it to come late?

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Forum -> Relationships -> Manners & Etiquette

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amother

Sun, Dec 21 2014, 8:13 am

On a scale of 1-10, how rude is it to come half an hour late to a lunch date?

What if the person you're making wait is notorious for coming late himself?

What if this time he's on a tight schedule and you know that?

ChutzPAh

Sun, Dec 21 2014, 8:17 am

Very rude.
Was this a business meeting or personal?
Did you call to say you would be late?

DrMom

Sun, Dec 21 2014, 8:36 am

So... you're coming late to teach him a lesson?

Very passive-aggressive. And your message will probably not be absorbed.

Come on time, and next time you plan to meet, mention that you have other things to do that day, so he should respect your time just as you respect his. Teach by example and then a verbal follow-up to drive home the point.

amother

Sun, Dec 21 2014, 8:38 am

It wasn't I who came late. My dh was on a business trip, but this was a personal lunch date with his nephew and his nephew came half an hour late, which made dh later than he wanted to be for his next appointment.

Dh is hopping mad and I'm trying to calm him down.

I don't think dh's nephew is aware that dh is always late, so no one was trying to teach anyone a lesson. Except me, who's quietly sniggering to myself.

seeker

Sun, Dec 21 2014, 11:12 am

Very rude, especially of you know he's on a tight schedule. If you know he has a hard time being punctual and has somewhere to go, you shouldn't make it harder for him. The least you can do is call to say you'll be late and offer to reschedule if he doesn't want to wait.

zaq

Sun, Dec 21 2014, 2:46 pm

On a scale of 1-10? half an hour late for a lunch? about an 8-1/2. But if your dh is himself a habitual latecomer, maybe having been on the receiving end will teach him a lesson. Maybe, though not likely. IME either people are punctual or they are not, and if they are not, they will always be this way unless they have a powerful desire to change and put in great effort, along the lines of quitting smoking.

greenfire

Sun, Dec 21 2014, 3:00 pm

when I open my yahoo - there's a list of the top 10 searches

there was listed: dress shirts for men & watches for women

I figured men want to make women on time & women want to make men look nice

of course that's just a general thought

but you can't really change people - nor can you get angry getting a taste of your own medicine -

all anyone could do is apologize & carry on

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