Where would we fit in?

mama g

Thu, Feb 05 2015, 10:53 pm

Thank you so much, everyone. So, I think we are probably chardal then... That's helpful to know. I started looking at real estate in Jerusalem more, but wow. Expensive. We checked into Moshav Matityahu, but all the kids have to go to school in Kiryat Sefer -- I don't know how well the kids would fit in. I'm going to throw a dart at a map of Israel and move wherever it lands... Confused

FranticFrummie

Thu, Feb 05 2015, 11:32 pm

OP, you sound a lot like me! Check out the northern town of Nahariya. That's where we're planning to move. It's a lovely, medium sized, mixed community that doesn't make you feel like you have to fit into any specific box. Being right on the beach is a huge plus, and the housing is very inexpensive compared to most other places.

They have a very nice dati/torani school, Evan Shoham. I think it would be a good fit for you. The uniforms are t-shirts for the boys and girls, girls wear a dark skirt, boys wear dark pants. No tights required for the girls, which makes DD very happy. She's a sensory kid, too. She has some learning issues, and the school was very welcoming and supportive.

PM me if you want to know more!

November

Fri, Feb 06 2015, 3:08 am

I think moving up north is a interesting thought, but will depend a lot on the ages of your kids and their needs, social and otherwise. Young kids can be moved a lot easier than older kids. You sound more like American charedi than dati L'eumi or chardal. Chardal is great in theory but in practice it's a relatively insular Israeli community that is not very easy to break into or feel part of. Like others, if your kids are older, I'd recommend a community with more Americans such as RBS or Har Nof, where your kids can continue learning on the level (or above) in Judaics and will make like-minded friends. Depending on the school you choose, you should expect secular studies to be less strong than what they have in the States. You can PM me too if you want to.

chevi1

Fri, Feb 06 2015, 3:42 am

mama g wrote:

moshav matityahu is a great place but kids not only have to fit in, but also get accepted in ks, and they are pretty insular regarding who they accept. def not open minded at all, to put it mildly. and I also think it is a def. minus to raise kids in a completely anglo comm., bc they have a very hard time fitting in and finding themselves after as, well, israelis.

I do have an idea for you, which I think really sounds like what you are looking for... in fact a fam. similar to yours recently moved here. convert parents, were mizrachi, american, now more chardal etc. and they seem to love it! I don't want to out myself, where I live, or this family withou permission, so pm me if you want more info. on this comm.

silbergirl

Fri, Feb 06 2015, 3:47 am

I second Har Nof (super friendly, very diverse frum community but overall Yeshivish style), though its very expensive to live there. RBS, Telzstone and Ramot may also be an option.
I also second Shapell's. Its a good yeshiva for older BT/Gerim. They offer all levels and are very accommodating towards a professional schedule of the student.

2BZ

Mon, Feb 16 2015, 12:21 pm

Have you asked your mentors/families that you are close with in America? Being that they are your inspiration and "mold" so to speak, they might be ones to guide you.

As you are seeing on this forum, Frum life has many varied nuances. In America its easier to just be and not have the need to "define" yourself so specifically. You can send your girls to "Bais Yaakov" in America yet be any one of about 6 different types that in Israel would each have their own school, shul, community.

In Israel the school you choose becomes that fork in the road leading to a very defined path later on. There's much history and politics as to why this is so. But its important to be aware of that fact. Jews are wonderful people and we really love each other deep down. But in a place that's all Jewish (I.e. Israel) that's where the differences become so much more pronounced.

Its kind of like buying your wine in a general grocery store (U.S.A.) vs. buying it in the specialized wine store (Israel). Your getting a lot more authenticity in Israel but then of course everyone is much more heated up about all issues that make us Jewish: army to defend our beloved land, or army to make us like any other country... Torah as our lifeblood and seriously the breadth of our days (ki heim chayeinu-kollel) or torah as a nice sidepoint... how to deal with shemittah when its your bread and butter literally not a theoretical mitzvah. And the list goes on and on...

You may have to work from a financial vantage point first and all other issues secondary. Life in Israel-mainly real estate- is very, very expensive. Do you have a viable parnassah?
Though it must be mentioned that its easier to be "poor" in Israel as most people are; the standards are so much lower.
Those who mentioned the north-its much cheaper-that sounds like the key reason for them to be there in the first place. Yet can you handle the insecurity factor along with all of the other adjustments?