Please help... Need brooklyn school recommendation for dd

amother

Sun, Mar 01 2015, 12:01 pm

I have a third grade daughter who is currently in a co-ed, kiruv type community school. I am remarried and we are basically a blended family that's RWMO/JPF. My ex basically keeps kosher and shabbat, and is completely anti religion in most other aspects. I also have a 4th grader with special needs who is a Bais Yaakov type school and thriving, but will need to be mainstreamed either for this September or next.

My 3rd grader has been in the community school out of convenience and tuition generosity on their part, but she isn't thriving at all socially and emotionally. She's extremely sensitive and cries all the time that everyone there is mean. She also seems to get into trouble a lot at the school. My understanding is that there are a lot of poor middot in general at the school, classrooms that are out of control, teachers that scream at the kids to discipline, and a principal that has a huge ego problem and won't work with parents at all. her hebrew teacher for the past 2 years is actually one bright spot... extremely warm and caring... however since most of the students are israeli, the class races through ivrit b'ivrit and dd has fallen extremely behind and is very turned off by the curriculum.

My daughter has begged me for the following:
a) to please send her to a school that has all girls
b) to please not send her to a public school
c) to please send her to a place where they teach chumash in english
d) to please send her to a place where everyone cares about each other and accepts each other for who they are
e) to please sent her to a school where she can be herself and be proud to be a jew

She is also struggling emotionally now. She's become a bit of a behavioral problem and has very obvious self esteem issues. I put her in private therapy to try to work on this, and I really feel she needs a more loving, warmer environment in a school for a fresh start.

Getting dd accepted to schools now and in the past has been difficult because of the following factors:
a) her father is very outspoken about being anti anything and anyone more religious than he is and will offend administrators
b) we have been judged by one school for having her in a school that doesn't have too many frum kids
c) at the last school we interviewed at, she tested as behind in math and chumash so they weren't enthused about taking her
d) we can't afford a huge tuition
e) we would like to put her in a school that would also be open to possibly accepting her sister if mainstreamed (one school outright told us "we are NOT special ed!")

I'm not interested in lying to get her into a school, or leaving out details. I would like wherever I put her to know what they are dealing with and to be able to work with us. I'm looking for small classes and a warm environment that will cater to the individual needs. I am a huge proponent of strong secular academics but at this point, the socio-emotional aspect is more important for dd. In terms of the religious level of the school, I am flexible, as long as they are are a frum school and won't judge our levels.

After all that, any suggestions? Someone just yesterday told me about Shalsheles Bais Yaakov and was also wondering if, given the above information, that might be a good fit.