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Ema of 5




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Mar 16 2015, 2:34 pm
Someone wrote in that thread that she was given a heter to only dunk one time.

I fell down the steps in my house a few weeks ago and hurt my coccyx (tush bone) so it hurts when I bend. When I went to the Mikva last time I was not able to do all three dunks. The Mikva lady said that one time is Halacha, 2 times is mehudar, and 3 times is amazing. So I shouldn't worry that I couldn't do all three.

So my question is, if only one dunk is ACTUAL Halacha why would you need a heter not to do the rest?
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youngishbear




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Mar 16 2015, 2:37 pm
It becomes a neder.
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Ema of 5




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Mar 16 2015, 2:39 pm
youngishbear wrote:
It becomes a neder.

Then you need to say hataras be sarin or whatever, but why the heter? A heter is for something that is halacha that you can't do. If it's notnhalacha why do you need a heter?
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Ema of 5




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Mar 16 2015, 4:40 pm
Just curious....what were the three hugs for?
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youngishbear




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Mar 16 2015, 5:06 pm
eema of 3 wrote:
Just curious....what were the three hugs for?


I didn't hug you, but I really should. You mentioned getting hurt in your OP, and some women take your pain to heart.

I don't know exactly, but I do know that it becomes a halachic issue. They usually will say don't worry about it since it isn't halacha.

So why call if you know the answer? I dunno...
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Ema of 5




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Mar 16 2015, 5:08 pm
youngishbear wrote:
I didn't hug you, but I really should. You mentioned getting hurt in your OP, and some women take your pain to heart.

I don't know exactly, but I do know that it becomes a halachic issue. They usually will say don't worry about it since it isn't halacha.

So why call if you know the answer? I dunno...

Thanks!! Bh I'm getting better slowly :-) I've been back at work for a week, which is great!

Your last line is really my question. But thinking about it now, maybe people just don't know and they assume the basic Halacha is three. So that begs the question of why women don't know the halachos.
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youngishbear




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Mar 16 2015, 5:25 pm
It's also possible that some do pasken that three is halacha. Sadly, I don't know for sure...

Some women dunk three sets of three. That was told to me by my kallah teacher as a minhag in some families, to ask my mother. And also to do so bli neder.
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rosehill




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Mar 16 2015, 7:07 pm
eema of 3 wrote:
So that begs the question of why women don't know the halachos.


Yes, that bothers me greatly. As a bride, I was simply taught 'this is what we do'. Over the years, through refresher courses, and specific questions I've had, I've learned more about which parts are d'Oraita, which parts are d'Rabbanan, which are minhag etc. I still haven't worked out why I wasn't trusted with that information to begin with.
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amother


 

Post Mon, Mar 16 2015, 7:53 pm
My Dh was told since I'm very scared to put my head under water I can dunk once. I mentioned it to the ML and she scoffed- you're not scared enough to only do one, I've seen women who are really scared and they can do one.
Really?! Who are you to override the psak I got?! Exploding anger
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