Spinoff - "is it real?"

chanie18

Wed, Apr 01 2015, 3:16 pm

why do people say "is it real?" if they see a piece of jewelry etc?

like, "nope, you're just imagining that I'm wearing a pair of sparkly earrings" or "yep, real cubic zirconium"

whats the difference? its sparkly, pretty and doesn't break the bank... and what does it matter to anyone else anyway?

amother

Cerise

Wed, Apr 01 2015, 3:23 pm

When people gush over a piece of (fake) jewelry I'm wearing, I usually say it's not real. My in-laws are rich and the town's famous "chessed" people. And although they don't give us a penny, people all think we get everything served to us on a golden platter. I don't like being "the spoiled princess with the real jewelry", so I make a point of saying.

When I ask, it's usually because I love the piece and would buy something like that for myself. Only if it's not real, that is. And that's why I ask.

amother

Khaki

Wed, Apr 01 2015, 3:26 pm

Some people ask because they are tactless and curious, some people are parroting a question they've heard before to make conversation, and some people ask so they can file you in the right box in their mind.

None of these are really good reasons, but they are reasons just the same. If you know why they're asking it's easier to give an "appropriate " answer.

To the tactless and curious I usually say something like "nope, just your imagination!" And laugh a bit with a wink.

To the conversation making parrots I'll share when I got it or who it's from or compliment their shoes or whatever.

To the box people I just smile and change the topic completely.

ETA previous amother, thanks for explaining your reason for asking. I don't think I've ever encountered the question with that back story, but I'll be aware of if for the future.

FTR- I own a total of 1 real item of jewelery

amother

Oak

Wed, Apr 01 2015, 4:22 pm

My aunt got a really expensive peice of jewelry from her dh when they made a simcha. She didnt feel comfortable wearing something so flashy, until someone told her everyone will think its fake.

I took a white gold jewlery to a place to get fixed. They didnt believe it was real. Everyone automatically assumes most jewelry is fake.

amother

Seafoam

Wed, Apr 01 2015, 4:30 pm

Maybe this goes in the other thread, but my SIL had a strand of (fake) pearls before she got married. She then told her ILs not to get her pearls b/c she already had. They instead asked her what she wanted and she said earrings, so she got a nice pair of diamond earrings. Anyway, she says she has the best of both worlds b/c everyone thinks that her (fake) pearls were given in the yichud room and are obviously real and she has nice earrrings (that most people probably think are fake LOL

As a PS, my brother was shocked when I told him my engagement/wedding rings are gold. He thought it was silver. He had no idea that white gold exists!

FranticFrummie

Wed, Apr 01 2015, 5:59 pm

I'm a smart aleck, so I tend to pull out my invisible physics textbook and say "Well, it consists of matter, and occupies space and time, so it meets all the criteria!" Tongue Out

Or I tell the truth, depending on the other person's sense of humor.

What gets me, is when someone sees twins or triplets, and wants to know if they are "natural". A friend of mine has the perfect answer - "No, they're made of a new space age polymer. It's amazing what they can do these days, isn't it?" Some people really do deserve smarty pants comebacks. Rolling Eyes

amother

Cerise

Wed, Apr 01 2015, 6:10 pm

FranticFrummie wrote:

What gets me, is when someone sees twins or triplets, and wants to know if they are "natural". A friend of mine has the perfect answer - "No, they're made of a new space age polymer. It's amazing what they can do these days, isn't it?" Some people really do deserve smarty pants comebacks. Rolling Eyes

When people ask if my twins were natural, I say "No, they were c-section".

However I think these two comparisons are very different.

Fox

Wed, Apr 01 2015, 6:50 pm

There are so many really well-done synthetic options for gems these days, that I sometimes wonder why people bother with the real thing. An investment-grade diamond, for example, isn't necessarily the most attractive choice for a ring -- you'd be better off putting it in the safe-deposit box and getting a synthetic one.

Metals can be a bit trickier, but the prices of gold and silver have led to some more sophisticated plating techniques that look like 14K or 18K and don't seem to wear away like plating in the past did.

Pearls are ridiculously easy to render in well-done fakes.

Of course, if you really are purchasing the jewelry as an investment, you want the real thing, and if fine jewelry happens to be your personal luxury, you'll probably be enough of a connoiseur to want the best.

Personally, my diamond engagement ring was stolen about 25 years ago, and I was delighted to replace it with a synthetic stone. But jewelry isn't my thing. Open a discussion on sterling silver flatware versus silver-plated, though, and I'll get completely stupid.

Barbara

Wed, Apr 01 2015, 6:54 pm

Fox wrote:

So, tell us about the virtues and problems with sterling silver vs. silver-plated flatware.

amother

Pearl

Wed, Apr 01 2015, 9:17 pm

I hate lying straight out so I'll say 'it was an anniversary/birthday/Tom tov present!' Or I'll joke 'Dh better watch out if it isn't.' People assume it means yes.

It's funny someone brought up 'natural' children, when people ask if my child after several years of marriage is natural I say 'it was a surprise!' Well it was, we had no idea when treatments would work.

Iymnok

Thu, Apr 02 2015, 2:39 am

I have a severe allergy to most metals. I can only wear gold, platinum and some silver without getting a rash or infected. So my jewellery is real and expensive which is why I don't have so much.
I bought platinum hooks to replace on cheap jewellery so I can wear more casual earrings. I'm planning on buying a white gold chain so I can wear any pendant.
The problem now is that I now have more expensive tastes!

amother

White

Thu, Apr 02 2015, 3:21 am

chanie18 wrote:

I asked someone once because she was wearing yellow metal earrings that had a beautiful design. I could never find gold earrings I liked so I thought maybe there is a special place that sells cute gold earrings and not just plain.
I think she got embarrassed and I apologized.

Chayalle

Thu, Apr 02 2015, 8:00 am

Fox wrote:

In fact, my sister was given two rings - the gold design is identical, and one stone is diamond, the other I CZ. The diamond ring sits in her safe deposit box. And that gorgeous big ring people compliment is actually a fake.

Nuts.

Fox wrote:

Personally, my diamond engagement ring was stolen about 25 years ago, and I was delighted to replace it with a synthetic stone. But jewelry isn't my thing. Open a discussion on sterling silver flatware versus silver-plated, though, and I'll get completely stupid.

I lost my diamond ring when I was expecting my youngest DD, and it remained lost for 7 years. The circumstances were such that I was unsure if it was lost or stolen......Anyway, I bought a silver/CZ ring for about $35 and got more compliments on that than I ever got on my "real" ring.

Last summer, DH was driving DD to daycamp, and he overheard her exclaim delightedly over finding a ring in the car, saying "I found it so it's mine. This ring is pretty. I'm going to wear it....." He pulled over and asked to see the ring, and it was mine!

Needless to say, he turned around and came straight home and presented me with my ring, once again..... Smile

We cleaned that car for Pesach 7 times since that loss......plus many times in between....and we had never found the ring. At this point, I think the ring was worth more than the car. Smile

Raisin

Thu, Apr 02 2015, 8:50 am

Barbara wrote:

So, tell us about the virtues and problems with sterling silver vs. silver-plated flatware.

please don't tell me you have sterling silver flatware. Someone upthread was talking about starving children in africa. Think of how many villages you could feed if you sold it.

I have stainless steel cutlery and it works very well. The teaspoons get lost but what can you do?

Chayalle

Thu, Apr 02 2015, 8:58 am

Barbara wrote:

So, tell us about the virtues and problems with sterling silver vs. silver-plated flatware.

I inherited my grandmother's. It sits in a chest because I hate polishing - my least favorite chore. And I already have a nice set of stainless steel flatware, service for 24, that lasts nicely.

I really should take Raisin's words about the starving children in Africa to heart...How heartless of me, to have it just sitting there.

Barbara

Thu, Apr 02 2015, 1:19 pm

Chayalle wrote:

Silver plate isn't worth much of anything. I could sell it all, but it would only feed a starving family for a couple of days. Funny thing is that about 1/2 of it is my grandmother's, and the other half DH's mother's; they had the same pattern. We use it for Shabbat and holidays when we have guests. The chest keeps it from tarnishing. Before I adopted the chest, I used anti-tarnish cloth, and it worked quite well.

Frumdoc

Thu, Apr 02 2015, 1:31 pm

marina wrote:

I just don't like gold, silver, diamonds, pearls. Not kidding. I think they are so boring and common and sometimes ostentatious. I like interesting jewelry with color or a cool pattern, like Michal Negrin. I have some gold, silver, cubic z stuff. Never wear it. Anyone else just not like it?

Yep, not into jewellery. Except my engagement ring, which I love for sentimental reasons. Don't have any, except some cheap dangly earrings I occasionally wear.

Don't wear makeup either. Or designer clothes.

None of that makes me a better or worse person, it is just I have pretty basic needs and taste, it is a personality thing: it is just what I like.

Well, except if you got me an old edition of a classic encyclopedia, textbook or literature, which I would go crazy for. But I don't have any. Books I adore.