Fears - Any way I can relieve it?

myself

Mon, Apr 13 2015, 4:49 pm

DS 8 has been having fears a lot recently, especially at bedtime, and he complains night after night that he can't fall asleep as he's having scary thoughts.

Any ideas?

JMM-uc

Mon, Apr 13 2015, 5:00 pm

My nephew who is 6 suffers terribly at night.
He sleeps with a tehillim book under his pillow. Seems to calm him a little.

Ask him what he's afraid of. Nights are always scarier even to us adults.

Make sure he doesn't eat right before bed. I find that that causes nightmares.

Maybe sit with him till he falls asleep?

If all fails maybe try melatonin? It's a good sleep aid.

myself

Mon, Apr 13 2015, 5:09 pm

Thanks JMM.

I gave him a tefilla (to prevent bad dreams) to say before bed but he says it doesn't help, though he thankfully doesn't have bad dreams b'h. It's the thoughts prior to falling asleep, and sometimes during the day too.

The things is that he doesn't really need melatonin either as he sleeps well b'h. He often complains and complains and then I'll come back a little later and find him asleep... he also has trouble with scary thoughts if he wakes up in the night. I've tried to leave the door open a little more so it isn't dark in the room (as I find that helpful if DH is away and I'm alone at night) but he says it doesn't make a difference. I've also told him to try to think about nice things and he said that whenever he does that he imagines something bad happening in middle of the nice thing... how sad. Sad

Another idea I gave him was to try not to think but to picture an image or to sing or say the alef beis in his head... a bit like the counting sheep, but of course bad thoughts keep cropping up.

I feel so sorry for him. Sad

JMM-uc

Mon, Apr 13 2015, 5:26 pm

Did you ever see the little colorful lights that are designed to hang in a room? It looks sorta like x-mas lights and make bedtime exciting. or maybe even just a plain night light plus a tape or disc with soft music or a story to fall asleep too.
Sometimes a white noise machine is helpful. I know that for me ocean sounds are relaxing.
Last but not least you can try a weighted blanket I've heard a lot of great feedback on those. They help with anxiety.

Of course make sure nothing is going on. ..nothing troubling him.

But I'm sure you knew that already Smile

PAMOM

Mon, Apr 13 2015, 5:27 pm

How old is he? When dd was about 5, she started bring afraid of monsters at night time. She'd sleep well and didn't have nightmares but cried every night. I got monster spray to use every night to keep them away. What was it? Febreze with the label soaked off--and it worked ! And the house smelled good too.

myself

Thu, Apr 16 2015, 5:09 pm

Thanks JMM.

PAMOM, cute idea, though he's too old for monster spray unfortunately. LOL

B'h he doesn't hear much news, otherwise I fear he'd be way worse...

I put some lavendar oil on his pillow and it's working somewhat... we'll see, it's still quite a to-do to get him to bed.