What to do with 5 yr old DS when working?

amother

Pumpkin

Wed, Apr 22 2015, 12:43 pm

I work from home 3 days a week. I work for a lawyer and the days I am home I am answering clients calls. The busy phone hours for some reason is the time my 5 yr. old DS comes home from yeshiva.
What do I do with my DS when I have to work? He would be fine and would let me work if I would put him in front of a computer with games or videos but the problem is my husband is so against him going on the computer which he is addicted to. I have toys for him to play with but if he sees me on the computer he will try to get on my lap to use it meanwhile I am on the phone with a client.

Any advice would be helpful. Not working those hours are not an option also for some reason my boss loves to call after 3 to discuss any things that came up during the day and I always have to take his call because I am suppose to be working.

Wed, Apr 22 2015, 2:59 pm

Can you talk to him about it? Mommy has to work sometimes when you're home, and when I'm on the phone I can't talk to you at the same time... what special thing would you like to play with just when I'm working? (Coloring, specific toy...)

MMCH

Wed, Apr 22 2015, 3:17 pm

is there something that he loves to do, like a special activity that is messy/annoying most of the times?

For example, my 4 year old DD LOVES to paint. But she spreads out, gets paint everywhere, uses every brush, every paint...
so If I were you, I would set aside that time for that kind of activity.

Stickers, playdoh, play sand...

MamaBear

Wed, Apr 22 2015, 3:20 pm

So it needs to be something he's really focused on. Maybe a lego set?

These coloring books are really advanced, in a good way, for a kid:

http://www.amazon.com/PrismDes.....69008

Wed, Apr 22 2015, 3:34 pm

Ime, babysitters while I'm working at home aren't that helpful. I'm right there, audio the babysitter feels stifled (or something!) and my kids want to spend time with me because I'm right there.

You're probably better off giving him something special during work time.

Barbara

Wed, Apr 22 2015, 3:44 pm

kb wrote:

I disagree.

A 5 year old who is being supervised by his mother cannot reasonably be expected not to occasionally interrupt her while she is on the telephone.

A 5 year-old interrupting someone while on the phone with a client demonstrates a woeful lack of professionalism by the employee.

If I were a client, I'd let it go the first time, speak to the attorney the second time, and fire the attorney the third, as it would look like me work was taking second place to babysitting.

So the child needs to be in after school care, or needs to be watched by a babysitter while mom works behind a closed, locked if necessary, door.

Sorry to be blunt.

be good

Wed, Apr 22 2015, 4:01 pm

is adjusting your hours an option?
I work until kids get home, and fill in the last hour or so of work time in the evening after they are in bed.
It may be worth asking, especially if you broach it from the angle that you would like to help portray him as professionally as possible and give 100% to the job.

mha3484

Wed, Apr 22 2015, 4:05 pm

DH combines self employment and child care. He can only get work done when my older one (4 years old) is asleep or in school. Some afternoons he gets lucky and DS will play nicely on his own but he cant count on it. You have to either structure your hours to his schedule or find after school classes, babysitter etc. As someone who has worked for many lawyers over the years it really is not something you can do with kids around. If you are lucky and no one hears him in the background the distractions from not being able to truly concentrate can cause serious errors.

justcallmeima

Wed, Apr 22 2015, 4:15 pm

If your are "supposed to be working" then you are supposed to be working. You can not work and watch a 5 year old at the same time. If you were working in an office, would you bring your 5 year old to work every day for a couple of hours?

smss

Wed, Apr 22 2015, 4:41 pm

have you asked your boss? I once worked for a company from home (not an attorney, but it was a company that definitely wanted to make a good customer service impression) and my boss told me it was completely fine to have kids in the background while I made phone calls. she said nowadays so many people work remotely and everyone understands and it makes you look more human and authentic which in her opinion was a good thing. *I* thought it would be a huge no-no, but she completely didn't....

oliveoil

Wed, Apr 22 2015, 4:42 pm

you need to hire a babysitter and make it very clear that you are not available. lock yourself in your office. or better yet, get the babysitter to take him out to the park, or do exciting activities with him so he will not be bored and come looking for you.

amother

Pink

Wed, Apr 22 2015, 5:12 pm

I work from home 2 days a week and it's only possible with a babysitter. I work in a separate room that I generally keep locked. I had let the babysitter know in advance that I'd be here twice a week and I do sometimes come over but mostly we each do our own thing.

My baby is no issue at all. My 3 year old was clingy at the beginning, but now she's totally fine with it. Shes very aware that I'm working and doesn't try to disturb. I do sometimes need to work with her around and if I do, I let her watch tv. I also try to avoid calls then or I'll let the person on the other end know that my daughter is with me (obviously only if appropriate.)

One thing that I do sometimes wonder about is that even though I work in a separate room, my kids can make a lot of noise and I always wonder if the ppl on the other end can hear. No ones ever commented on this, including my boss, so hopefully the sound doesn't carry through the phone.

Ahuva's Mommy

Thu, Apr 23 2015, 9:11 am

I would get a babysitter, but ask them to take him out, at least for part of the time. This way he is not clinging to you, but also getting to do something fun and getting the attention he made need after being in school all day. I would also make an effort to try to make sure that bedtime is a time for him to get special attention from you.

Barbara

Thu, Apr 23 2015, 9:16 am

smss wrote:

There's a difference between a child playing in the background, and a child interrupting a call, or needing to interrupt a call to look after a child.

Chayalle

Thu, Apr 23 2015, 10:27 am

I work from home. When DD was a baby, we were able to match her after-babysitter time to nap time, WITH DH HOME to take care of her for the times when she did not take that expected nap.

When she got older - at about age 3 - the naps stopped, and DH could barely catch his breath and have a sandwich. At that point we opted to put her into an after-playgroup program, which she attended from age 3 to 5 (at which time she started Primary and had a longer day).

A young child does not entertain him/herself on a regular, dependable basis. A woman cannot do two jobs at once (working and childcare). Something has to give here. Putting the child on the computer is not likely the answer either - it may work a couple of times but your child will likely get bored of this, too. He needs someone to be in charge of entertaining him, and that can't be you while you are working.

Fox

Thu, Apr 23 2015, 12:01 pm

I'm with Barbara and CFriedman2 on this. I've worked out of my house for over 15 years, and when I had small kids, I always had a babysitter.

Being a "WAHM" has absolutely nothing to do with the need for childcare arrangements. There are plenty of advantages to being a WAHM, such as no commute and the ability to pick up a sick child from school, etc., but avoiding child care costs is definitely not one of them.

Get a babysitter or arrange after-school care of some sort.

Ultimately, you are doing your son a favor. You are teaching him that your time is valuable and that work involves responsibility and honesty. Those lessons are not incompatible with being a loving mother; they are about respecting the limits that all of us must live with.

Ruchel

Fri, Apr 24 2015, 6:40 am

Really depends on the kid.

I worked a few hours a day with baby Moyshele. He was in a thing like this, in the living room, sometimes not even noticed by my students lol. http://www.centraledesmultiple.....3.jpg

When he became more mobile, I baby proofed his room and he had to be there. This doesn't work for very long times or for all babies.

At 5 they know (mine) not to bother and to stay in their room if we need the office, or in the office on the comp if we need the living room. But again, not for long hours either, though you can give them snacks and water.