Buying a home is like dating???

Shani88

Fri, May 22 2015, 2:42 pm

I feel like buying a house is like finding a husband! Dh and I recently looked at a house that we are considering making an offer for. We did not have very good feelings going in to it, but after seeing it for the first time, we actually liked it! We felt like it was a house we could see ourselves in. The past few days though, we have been having second thoughts. Is this a house we can live with FOR THE REST OF OUR LIFE? Do we like the house as is, or does it need a lot of CHANGES? Is it realistic to buy a house that we want to CHANGE? Are we COMFORTABLE with this house? The questions going through my mind make me feel like I am dating again!!!!

amother

Seafoam

Fri, May 22 2015, 2:47 pm

thats funny. I didn't really feel like that. you aren't married to a house- you can move. it also doesn't resist making changes Smile

We are currently under contract- this is our second home. Our first home we put a big addition on. We knew what was out there so we figured we would just do it ourselves. This home we might make minor changes but that's it. Both times we didn't feel like there were a lot of options. If you are moving someplace with tons of houses for sale then yeah I can see the decision being more difficult.

penguin

Fri, May 22 2015, 3:01 pm

Well, first of all, you don't have to stay there the rest of your lives. As your family grows or just as the ages of your kids grow you might decide you have different needs or jobs can change etc. But you do want to see yourselves living there for some time.

It's also like dating in that sometimes you have unrealistic expectations and you need some flexibility and willingness to accept a less than perfect situation.

workaholicmama

Fri, May 22 2015, 6:21 pm

We're also currently looking to buy a house. It's actually one of the things called out in heaven before a person is born. Just like it's said "bas ploni lploni," so it is said "Beis ploni lploni ".... so op you're not that far off... I know what this indecision is, I wish you that you find the right house "b'neikl".

Shani88

Fri, May 22 2015, 6:28 pm

workaholicmama wrote:

Haha thanks you too!!!

etky

Sun, May 24 2015, 2:59 pm

Yes, I definitely do think it resembles dating despite the obviously different type of commitment involved.
There should be a click - some type of chemistry. It's not enough that the house meets your laundry list of requirements. When the house is right for you, you sort of 'know it' inside, like when you meet the right guy. That's how I felt when we saw the home we are b"h living in now - a recognition that 'this was it', and a desire to live there.

imasoftov

Mon, May 25 2015, 2:03 am

If you move, no one is reluctant to sell you a new house.
If you move out of a house to an apartment, real estate agents won't look down upon your children when they want to buy.
The house can't refuse to let you move.
You're allowed to touch the house before you buy it. And you don't have to live in a tent on the lawn for part of every month.
When you move, your children come with you.
If you're not sure about buying, it's OK to go on renting.
If you can afford it, you can own multiple houses at the same time, and they don't get jealous.

Jeanette

Thu, May 28 2015, 10:11 am

It really depends on what the housing market is like where you're looking.

If it's a buyer's market you can browse and browse at your leisure until you find something perfect that meets all your requirements.

If it's a seller's market you may have to take whatever is available that's somewhat suitable for your needs.

It also depends on how desperate you are to move.

Ema of 5

Thu, May 28 2015, 11:10 am

workaholicmama wrote:

seriously?!?!

imasoftov

Sun, May 31 2015, 5:42 pm

myself wrote:

Actually, yes.

But the altar doesn't cry if you sell your first home. And your lawyer won't force you to go for counselling before selling.