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-> Chinuch, Education & Schooling
amother
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Wed, Jun 24 2015, 6:09 am
What's with this new generation? They are my dc's friends, both boys and girls, they know my name, they've been to my house, yet they don't greet me when they see me. They look at me aknowledging my presence and pass by without a word.
Do their teach them not to, nowadays? And why wouldn't a boy my dc's age say hello to me?
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33055
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Wed, Jun 24 2015, 8:39 am
amother wrote: | What's with this new generation? They are my dc's friends, both boys and girls, they know my name, they've been to my house, yet they don't greet me when they see me. They look at me aknowledging my presence and pass by without a word.
Do their teach them not to, nowadays? And why wouldn't a boy my dc's age say hello to me? |
The lack of manners is appalling. How old are the children?
I find that children are not taught telephone manners either. I got calls asking to speak to my children as the greeting. They don't say good evening Mrs. Squishy. This is so and so calling. May I please speak to Squishy Jr?
I once got a kid demanding I pick him up. I answered the phone and he opened up by telling me to get him now because he wanted to get someplace earlier than I was scheduled to take the boys. I calmly picked up the other boys in the car pool and then picked him up. I pulled over and instructed him how to properly address an adult. I then called up his mother and told her what I said. I blame her for not teaching basic respect.
The not saying hello could come from the parents not greeting others. I got in trouble from my neighbor for asking her husband who is 30 YEARS younger than me if another neighbor is home for Shabbos. She said I was flirting with him. That was the extent of my conversation other than saying good shabbos. With these segregated societies normal social discourse is frowned on.
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Barbara
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Wed, Jun 24 2015, 9:03 am
amother wrote: | What's with this new generation? They are my dc's friends, both boys and girls, they know my name, they've been to my house, yet they don't greet me when they see me. They look at me aknowledging my presence and pass by without a word.
Do their teach them not to, nowadays? And why wouldn't a boy my dc's age say hello to me? |
Well, we don't know your child's age.
I strongly suspect that either (1) they're shy or otherwise reticent to speak to adults; or (2) they're not sure what to call you.
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Chayalle
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Wed, Jun 24 2015, 9:33 am
So model proper behavior for them. Walk right up to them and say "good day to you, Avi, how are you?" and stuff like that. They might catch on.
All of my teenage DD's friends say Hello to me when they call, and some will even shmooze with me for a bit. I greet them all and bake cookies, so it's worth their while.....
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Wed, Jun 24 2015, 9:44 am
Chayalle wrote: | So model proper behavior for them. Walk right up to them and say "good day to you, Avi, how are you?" and stuff like that. They might catch on.
All of my teenage DD's friends say Hello to me when they call, and some will even shmooze with me for a bit. I greet them all and bake cookies, so it's worth their while..... |
It also depends on what circle you are in.
I speak to everyone including adult males who enters my house. If you want something from me enough to come into my home you can greet me properly and not pretend I am invisible. I refuse to be marginalized there. LOL - they probably think I have the bad manners saying good morning to males.
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amother
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Wed, Jun 24 2015, 10:17 am
We are charedim in chul and I mean all ages, starting from 3 and till something 16, then they suddenly reember to greet. But still not the boys!
I've been a cheder teacher once and my former students are all ages, so they know me and acknowledge my presence only by swiftly looking at me.
I've been meaning to talk to their mothers, just to ask what's wrong, but don't want to sound odd if I bring this up. And I don't want them to feel bad that they don't teach their kids manners. Or I thought I don't know manners nowadays myself and wanted to ask here.
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amother
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Wed, Jun 24 2015, 10:19 am
Squishy wrote: | It also depends on what circle you are in.
I speak to everyone including adult males who enters my house. If you want something from me enough to come into my home you can greet me properly and not pretend I am invisible. I refuse to be marginalized there. LOL - they probably think I have the bad manners saying good morning to males. |
That's exactly where I am! I'm afraid I have bad manners not thinking of those kids as of males! LOL
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33055
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Wed, Jun 24 2015, 10:45 am
amother wrote: | That's exactly where I am! I'm afraid I have bad manners not thinking of those kids as of males! LOL |
I greet everyone now. I used to not greet frum males in my own home because that is what is done. I always greeted women. At first they were taken aback. Now they speak with me. I am not raising my son to disrespect women.
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