Sleep Away Camp - when they don't want to go

esskayesq

Wed, Jul 15 2015, 12:18 am

I have a boy who is almost 12. Thus far he has refused to go to sleep away camp. I didn't want to force as I was forced at a young age (9) and it was hard for me although I quickly got over it and ended up loving being away for the summer. But I always had 1-2 close friends who were with me in my bunk. He doesn't have that. He goes to a small yeshiva more right wing than we are and the kids in his class (only 10 kids) primarily go to the bungalow colonies with their families for the summer. So he doesn't have any real peer pressure to go away. This summer after many different day camps we found one he loves. Moshava Ba'ir in New Jersey. But he is in the oldest bunk and can't continue next year unless he goes to sleep away. He still refuses. He did 2 one night overnights this summer and was fine. I'm sure he can do it he's just being stubborn. I'm stuck between forcing him somewhere and trying to make him happy. Help! Any and all suggestions welcome. TIA.

WriterMom

Wed, Jul 15 2015, 12:19 am

Can you 'force' him to go for just one week/a short time, or is it all or nothing?

My kids who weren't keen started with a short session. (One of them said "can I please go for 8 weeks straight?" the first time, but the others were eased into it.)

esskayesq

Wed, Jul 15 2015, 12:47 am

I probably could but then what to do with him the rest of the summer? He's almost 12. Too old for day camp, too young to be a counselor. I just can't have him home the rest of the summer. I told him I'd do a month at least. And then one month day camp if we can find one or something else. He's "thinking about it".

Barbara

Wed, Jul 15 2015, 10:45 am

esskayesq wrote:

He's probably too old for traditional day camps. But in the past 5 to 10 years, a whole slew of new "camps" and programs have grown up in my area. See if they exist near you. Sports programs. Theater programs. Academic enrichment camps. Robotics. Zoo camp.

Also talk to the parents of his camp friends from this summer. I would guess that a lot of the kids will go to Moshava next summer, so he would have friends.

While you're at it, make a list of camps you would consider. A lot of overnight camps have 3-day get acquainted programs. Maybe he would enjoy trying that.

imasinger

Wed, Jul 15 2015, 10:49 am

The camp where he is now might be willing to use him as a junior counselor next year. It doesn't hurt to ask.

Also, check out frum boy scouts. There is a nice 1-2 week summer program for shomer shabbos scouts that might be worth your looking into.

OOTforlife

Wed, Jul 15 2015, 11:48 am

Does he prefer to be home? Is there any particular reason he can't be home most of the summer? Does he get into trouble when left to his own devices? Personally, I enjoyed having unstructured summers to hang out with friends, ride bikes, swim, read, and do whatever. But if he will spend all his free time watching TV or causing trouble, I can understand the need for more structure.

amother

Wine

Wed, Jul 15 2015, 12:03 pm

Can you get him to Passaic? There's a camp called Eeshay that goes up to leaving 9th grade. It's heavy on sports, and is specifically a day camp that is like a sleepaway camp only the boys stay home. They stay until 6:00 a couple nights a week and 7:30 a couple nights. It's a little more right wing than a Moshava crowd, but nothing too intense.

WriterMom

Wed, Jul 15 2015, 12:24 pm

OOTforlife wrote:

For some kids, they can handle unstructured summers. The deal with my oldest is that for a few weeks of the holiday, he doesn't have any camp scheduled - but he has to study every day, and he has to be active every day, and if he does those two things, then he can have some couch potato time. But he has a different temperament than my other kids, who need more hands-on programming, and I'm able to work from home/be on holiday most of the summer, so I'm around part of each day, even if working in the next room, so this isn't a one-size-fits-all solution.