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Hearing aids



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amother
Vermilion


 

Post Thu, Apr 23 2015, 2:19 pm
DD is 5 and we have just been told by the ENT that she needs hearing aids. WE are no 100% decided because we are waiting for her pediatrician to receive the reports, and he wants us to do MRI and other tests to determine the cause. B'H, we are talking about a hearing deficit, not anything even close to deafness. I recognize that as minor handicaps go, this is a very surmountable one, and to be honest, I think that I would choose it over most others. But it is still very upsetting.

Does your (not deaf) child have hearing aids? How does it affect him/her socially? How did you explain the topic to them to have them view it appropriately? Did it change how you or other family members viewed the child? How do you keep the child from being seen as "the nebach kid with hearing aids"? What were challenges involved that surprised you? What is something you wish you knew?
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amother
Jade


 

Post Thu, Apr 23 2015, 5:54 pm
IMHO, I think that in order to normalize it, your daughter needs to be proud of her difference and of her "cool" hearing aids.

Let her choose s funky color if she wants, add sparkles, gems , stickers and let her explain confidently to her classmates, in an informal way, why she has them and how they work. when she gets older she may decide to go with a less conspicuous color.

kinda like braces rubber bands

Basically, make them the cool new accessory!
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November




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Apr 23 2015, 6:59 pm
DS (13) has had a hearing aid for about 5 years. He loves it. No joke! It helps him to hear better. In fact he said it was even better than glasses. Try not to put "your stuff" on your child. Just be so thankful- repeatedly, out loud and in front of all of your kids/family- to Hashem and to inventors for having come up with a device that will help your child.
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amother
Vermilion


 

Post Thu, Apr 23 2015, 7:37 pm
OP here -
Thanks for responding. I am not sure that it's "my stuff" so much as my fears about how she will be treated by friends. I would be inclined to go with the "make it yours" idea except that I don't want her to be different if she doesnt have to be, to call attention to something which may make her a target. Thoughts?
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amother
Jade


 

Post Sun, Apr 26 2015, 7:18 pm
If you're not comfortable with making it a big deal then dont Do it. I don't think there's any wrong way to do it as long as there's no shame involved. She can get inconspicuous ones and explain on demand. Just as long as you and her are comfortable. hatzlacha!
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seeker




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 26 2015, 9:50 pm
I have mild-moderate hearing loss and I assure you that she will be treated much better by friends with a hearing aid than she will be treated if she misses out on subtle social cues due to lack of hearing.

Kids at 5 are very accepting. You can have her audiologist come to school and do a show-and-tell to answer questions because the main awkwardness is about curiosity at this age. Your concerns would be more valid if she were 10, but at 5 by the time she is old enough to worry everyone around her will be used to it.
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tryinghard




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jun 09 2015, 10:51 pm
OP here - we are now officially decided on this so I don't mind outing myself.
Anyone else have any suggestions for me? Tell me the good, the bad and the evil!
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amother
Orchid


 

Post Wed, Jun 10 2015, 1:09 am
My daughter has mild to moderate hearing loss. She is 4. We just started to put it on regularly- it is pink and adorable. She loves them! She says it makes her hear better (mommy I can hear the water from the sink ...!) And I'm also worried that kids will bully her.
She is a very confident kid and every time I change the battery, I put different stickers on, therefore it's exciting for her.
I try to encourage her and I often say 'Thank you hashem for making hearing aids so insert child's name shud be able to hear better"

It's hard with the neighbors/cousins/friends because they know her for a perfectly normal kid so I like when they ask me questions about it so I can explain that she has mild hearing loss and needs it for speech and language development.

I would love if we can form a closed group from mothers of children/people with hearing aids.
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amother
Puce


 

Post Wed, Jun 10 2015, 2:04 am
If you are in Israel, you can check out an organization called Shma Koleinu. They offer lots of support for children with hearing loss and their families.
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amother
Ginger


 

Post Wed, Jul 29 2015, 1:14 pm
I know this thread is over a month old, but hopefully you are still following this thread. Please join our facebook group- Hearing Impaired Jewish Discussion Group.
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amother
Burgundy


 

Post Wed, Jul 29 2015, 4:19 pm
not op, but happy to hear about the facebook group. my dc has moderately severe hearing loss. to answer the op, I live in a fairly close-minded community, that has B"H not had enough exposure to medical conditions, etc, to have lost the stigma yet. I made a very conscious choice to never let her feel bad about it. as they say, if you're being chased out of town, grab a baton and make it into a parade.

dd is one, and wears adorable pink hearing aids (with hot red molds). she usually wears a really cute cap to keep her from pulling them out (don't buy the ones from the hearing aid company, they are expensive and only come in 1-2 patterns. search mesh pilot cap on etsy. for inexpensive cute ones. the seller emmifaye in particular has worked with me to customize caps, at $10 a piece.)

typically, when we go to a community/family event, I will walk in and make my rounds with her NOT wearing the cap, even though I have to constantly make sure she's not pulling them out. I do not want anyone thinking that I am hiding it, etc. she's a beautiful, alert child and everyone comes to see that the hearing aids are just a small part of her.

when little kids ask about them, I can usually easily point out someone they know who has glasses, and say that just like glasses help people see, hearing aids help them hear.

when my daughter was diagnosed at 6 weeks, I felt that I was being given, R"L a ----was going to write death sentence, but rethought my words. suffice it to say, it took me a long time to come to terms with it, and mourn it (I too was guilty of all the stigma my community has). but truly, truly she's a blessing and when I look at her, I don't see it anymore. its such a small part of her huge personality.
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finallyamommy




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jul 29 2015, 4:31 pm
I don't have kids yet, but I wear hearing aids for a moderate-to-severe hearing loss. I also got hearing aids when I was 5. Anyone can PM me or ask here or whatever, if there are any questions that I can help with.
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amother
Rose


 

Post Thu, May 11 2017, 9:02 am
I'm posting to this topic as dealing with this as well

ds age 8 we just found hearing loss and were recommended he wears a hearing aid in school (and his teacher wears a microphone)
we didn't do anything yet as it makes us nervous of the stigma

then today took ds agae 5 for a test and he has the same problem

we have to check the whole family now as maybe there is something hereditary

I am in Israel but don't really know where to turn to find out more of what I am supposed to do about this..
any advice would be appreciated
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cm




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, May 11 2017, 9:36 am
amother wrote:
I'm posting to this topic as dealing with this as well

ds age 8 we just found hearing loss and were recommended he wears a hearing aid in school (and his teacher wears a microphone)
we didn't do anything yet as it makes us nervous of the stigma

then today took ds agae 5 for a test and he has the same problem

we have to check the whole family now as maybe there is something hereditary

I am in Israel but don't really know where to turn to find out more of what I am supposed to do about this..
any advice would be appreciated


Is there a stigma about using hearing aids? And even if there is, does it outweigh the benefits of your children being able to hear, speak and learn more easily?
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amother
Coffee


 

Post Thu, May 11 2017, 10:11 am
To the mother in E"Y, contact AV Israel. They are internationally known and will help you immensely.

As for the stigma, it's A LOT more embarrassing to miss things in conversation, have unclear speech, do poorly in school, and be out of the loop socially than it is to wear a simple hearing aid and FM system (the mic that the teacher would wear). I know this is not what you imagined for your children, and you need to give yourself space to grieve that privately, but for your children's sake, model a positive attitude. Hearing loss doesn't have to define them, it can be just one aspect of who they are. You will set the tone for how they feel about themselves -- it's only as big a deal as you make it.
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amother
Honeydew


 

Post Thu, May 11 2017, 12:39 pm
To repeat the wise words of others, my DS age 6 wears hearing aids. It took me a while to get used to the idea but Bh he is thriving, does incredibly well socially, and I know that without them he would have a very hard time socially. It's your job to make this a positive thing and get the hearing aids asap. Grieve in private. Then get the genetic testing when you're ready so you can decide what will be regarding for future children, but first take care of the ones you have.
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amother
Yellow


 

Post Thu, May 11 2017, 2:21 pm
Please make sure to explain it to the other kids in class. When I was 3-4 years old, there was a boy in my class with hearing aids, and no one siad anything to us, and all the kids thought he was weird and we made fun of him behind his back. One day an adult caught us and explained what hearing aids were and why he wears them and that it's just like glasses, and we stopped making fun of him instantly, just like that. Don't wait for kids to ask questions - they often don't know who or what to ask. But a non-chalant, not a big deal, 5 minute explanation can go a long way.
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rikki 1




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, May 11 2017, 3:43 pm
I'm a married mother of four kids, hearing impaired since toddlerhood (from meningitis) and I came out very well BH even with so few ppl around me with hearing impairment. It's much more accepted and common than it was years ago, much more technology, speech therapists. I'm sure your kids friends would be likely to already know about hearing impairment since it's common enough.
It will be TONS of work on your part but it really will be okay!! I have a friend with two hearing impaired children and they are doing fantastic!
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madys




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, May 11 2017, 3:51 pm
I'll jump on the bandwagon - my son is 13 and he was diagnosed at birth with a mild/moderate hearing loss. He wears hearing aids and he has NEVER had a problem socially.

The audiologist came to the class when he was little and explained to the children what they were and answered their questions.

Right now, he is in 7th grade, his bar mitzvah was just a few months ago. He leyned the parsha and the haf-torah beautifully. So many people came up to me after saying how professional and poised he was the whole time.

I have never treated him differently and neither do his teachers. He is a straight A student. His hearing loss was never seen as a handicap.
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