Please help me stay sane on Friday. advice

amother

Mint

Fri, Sep 11 2015, 5:01 pm

I started a new job, where I work RIGHT up until I have to go pick up all my kids. I make it by the skin of my teeth to my big ones, and have to pay late stay for the younger ones, and also make it with in the last minute.
I then race around picking up last minute errands, bc my Thursday was just as crazy!
then I come home, the kids are bonkers of course, im stressed, but I still need to do some cooking.
Obviously, I do things in advance, I have soup and challah and ready, things are basically all ready and prepared to be cooked. but my house is wild. my kids all need me at the same time bh, and im just having the hardest time.

any ideas? and ya if my dh were around, he would help, he isn't. he comes home basically as I am lighting.

I don't even work full time, and I feel like I am falling apart.

singleagain

Fri, Sep 11 2015, 5:03 pm

how old are your kids? can you have a special shabbat chore chart, like setting the table, cleaning the toys, the bigger ones helping the younger ones with the bath, --- can the bigger ones help you cook/prepare ----- if you do create a chart, you can put stickers or checks when things get done and when a certain amount adds up a special shabbat treat?

amother

Cerulean

Fri, Sep 11 2015, 5:27 pm

Make a chart where everyone has chores or watches a little one for a bit. Get a box and fill it with cheap prizes or have a special treat for your helpers. Give it out once you feel the house us calm, or after you shower. If you have mostly little one a dvd on friday is how I saved my sanity.

My kids outgrew prizes so I buy the jewish magazines and they can open it when the house is ready. If they help then there is less for me to do, so they get to read earlier. I dont believe in forcing my kids to help, just reward the ones that help.

seraphima

Fri, Sep 11 2015, 5:38 pm

Give them jobs to help you prepare. Make it into a game. Even if it takes you longer, it keeps them preoccupied. Being stressed will cause them to get a little more edgy and "bonkers" so just be really upbeat and make it fun. For the really small ones with short attention spans, I set up some "preferred" toys in the area that I am cooking (I have an open-floor plan house so there is space). By preferred toys I mean items that I know they love but I save for times I need to get stuff done Smile

amother

Mint

Fri, Sep 11 2015, 6:02 pm

thank you for the replies!!

yes, being stressed and anxious, makes my kids all the more wild!

Bh I have a 7.5 year old, a 5 year old, a 2.5 year old and a 4 month old.

My oldest bh is such a big help, sometimes I worry I rely on her too much! she is amazing with my 2.5 year old, which I will definitely implement a chart system, with prizes. thats a great idea thank you so much.

do you let your kids watch on friday? We have a strict 20 minutes a day watching policy, and only after everything that you need to do gets done, but I find myself saying ooookkk just put on uncle moishy so I can have a normal half hour! embarrassed

cuffs

Sat, Sep 12 2015, 5:02 pm

amother wrote:

It's so bad I also stick my baby in front of the computer when I need to cook. Or else he crawls up to me and bites my toes and wines that I should hold him!

ra_mom

Sat, Sep 12 2015, 8:58 pm

The only way I manage to prepare for shabbos while working is

Wednesday: shop and unpack
Thursday: cook everything (if there is something I want to make fresh on Friday, if there is enough time to bake it on Friday, I assemble Thursday night and stick it in the fridge ready to go)
Friday: cleaning woman (or sometimes I stay up until the early am cleaning Thursday night)

Hug

Last edited by ra_mom on Sun, Sep 13 2015, 12:13 pm; edited 1 time in total

sourstix

Sun, Sep 13 2015, 4:19 pm

[quote="ra_mom"]The only way I manage to prepare for shabbos while working is

Wednesday: shop and unpack
Thursday: cook everything (if there is something I want to make fresh on Friday, if there is enough time to bake it on Friday, I assemble Thursday night and stick it in the fridge ready to go)
Friday: cleaning woman (or sometimes I stay up until the early am cleaning Thursday night)

:hug red[/quote]
wow! you r so good I wish I was like that. I am sahm but I would love the push

gibberish

Wed, Sep 16 2015, 2:39 am

Yes, I agree with RA Mom - the only real way to do this and not be stressed is to do as much as possible in advance and only leave whatever can't be done beforehand for Friday. Cleaning can be done on Tues night, Shopping on Wed, cooking, setting the table, and bathing the kids on Thursday night, and just leave last minute touch-up cleaning and straightening-up for Friday.
Good luck!