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Forum -> Inquiries & Offers -> Moving/ Relocating
Really want to move but things not working out



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amother
Blonde


 

Post Thu, Oct 08 2015, 1:36 am
I really want to move out of NYC but all the signs are pointing towards staying.

I have looked into many different jobs and communities but they always fall through for one reason or another. I'm in a profession where it's hard to find a job that doesn't require Shabbos hours. I have a rather specialized set of skills and not every area has a demand for those particular skills. Pay outside NYC is quite a bit lower and the lower cost of living does not quite offset the lower pay especially since I have many children that I need to pay tuition for.

Problem is I can't afford the rent here. We are living with 8 children in 800 square feet. No exaggeration. And I'm not one of those women who can keep on top of the house and keep the clutter at bay. Our house looks exactly what you would expect it to look when you have 10 people crammed into a small space. Honestly I'm going insane.
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justforfun87




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Oct 08 2015, 1:48 am
You have got to get out! Food is cheaper usually as well. 8 kids in 800sq feet? Wow.
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Hashem_Yaazor




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Oct 08 2015, 8:31 am
Have you looked into places with tuition vouchers, where your lower salary won't be as noticeable because your tuition bills will also be lower?
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amother
Natural


 

Post Thu, Oct 08 2015, 11:36 am
Blonde what type of profession. What are your specialized skills.
Are you able to commute? Keep your job, but live in a different community where rent is considerably cheaper. I know many ppl who live in Lakewood and commute to Manhattan. It's hard, but not impossible.
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amother
Blonde


 

Post Thu, Oct 08 2015, 12:22 pm
Here's the thing. There's a particular community we really want to move to. Nice people, dirt cheap housing and not too far from nyc. I was invited to interview for a job that's an hour away from the frum community (but not a bad commute, it's straight down an interstate that does not have heavy traffic). It will start part time but they said the plan is to become full time within six months.

I'm so confused!! Do I give up a solid well paying full time job for a lower paying PT job that might grow to ft? There are so few job opportunities in that area. Maybe I should just wait until something else comes up.
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seeker




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Oct 08 2015, 12:55 pm
I would do it, sounds like everything you're looking for and a 6 month plan sounds a lot more solid than "growth opportunities" or whatever they usually say. Maybe the "dirt cheap housing" will make up for the smaller job? How far is it from NY, could you potentially commute back to your old job if this one doesn't work out?

Now I'm curious which community has nice people and dirt cheap housing not far from NYC.
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MagentaYenta




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Oct 08 2015, 1:04 pm
Have you crunched the numbers? What will be the cost of the commute, not just fuel but wear and tear on your vehicle and maint. ? Is the dirt cheap housing going to be possible if you are working part time? Will you have to use savings for deposits if you're renting? Will you have to pay xtra for childcare due to the commute?
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amother
Ginger


 

Post Thu, Oct 08 2015, 2:25 pm
I think you got to take the plunge and move. I don't think living with so many kids in such a small space is healthy. You didn't mention what your husband does and job opportunities for him.
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amother
Blonde


 

Post Thu, Oct 08 2015, 2:55 pm
My husband is a SAHD. I earn so much more than him it was not worth it for both of us to work and juggle childcare etc. The community we are considering may have better opportunities for him though. He wants it really bad.
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amother
Blonde


 

Post Thu, Oct 08 2015, 2:57 pm
MagentaYenta wrote:
Have you crunched the numbers? What will be the cost of the commute, not just fuel but wear and tear on your vehicle and maint. ? Is the dirt cheap housing going to be possible if you are working part time? Will you have to use savings for deposits if you're renting? Will you have to pay xtra for childcare due to the commute?


I've crunched the numbers and number wise we are better off staying here and being miserable in a tiny apartment. Thing is, housing is only going up and the longer we stay the less hope there is of things one day getting better (except maybe after all the kids move out).
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chayamiriam




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Oct 08 2015, 3:39 pm
I also think you should take the plunge its not fair to the kids to live like that. Its not a solution waiting for them to grow up to leave. Everything in life has risk you have to be able to make a change in order to have a change! Just some of my own thoughts
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MagentaYenta




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Oct 08 2015, 3:46 pm
amother wrote:
I've crunched the numbers and number wise we are better off staying here and being miserable in a tiny apartment. Thing is, housing is only going up and the longer we stay the less hope there is of things one day getting better (except maybe after all the kids move out).


I certainly feel that everyone in your family would benefit from personal space and privacy, but you're saying financially it doesn't work. If you cannot make the $$ work, how will your shortfall's be covered?

My suggestion would be for your husband take a part time job working nights for a finite period of time so that you could add to your savings and have a cushion. Target, most chain grocery stores, Home Depot and Lowes all hire night shift stockers.
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amother
Natural


 

Post Thu, Oct 08 2015, 4:34 pm
Is there no way to keep your current job and move?
You are planning to commute an hour anyway.
Find a community 1hr. commute from your current job.
What city do you live in?
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amother
Ginger


 

Post Thu, Oct 08 2015, 5:32 pm
It really doesn't make sense to stay where you are and be miserable. Especially since you have a job offer. I think you will all be happier.
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amother
Yellow


 

Post Thu, Oct 08 2015, 8:19 pm
MagentaYenta, I have a question. Do you know for a fact that those stores hire night time stockers??
Do they have a lot of openings?

My dh is a stay at home dad too and it would be great help for him to work at night to help add to our income.
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amother
Blonde


 

Post Fri, Oct 09 2015, 4:17 pm
No I don't have a job offer. I have a job interview for a part time job that is 60 miles away from the community we'd like to live in. Not very promising. No, I couldn't afford to live on a pt salary while waiting for ft to come through.

We will keep looking...

As to keeping current job, we've looked into nj and LI where houses are more affordable but the disadvantages outweigh the advantages.
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MagentaYenta




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Oct 09 2015, 5:00 pm
amother wrote:
MagentaYenta, I have a question. Do you know for a fact that those stores hire night time stockers??
Do they have a lot of openings?

My dh is a stay at home dad too and it would be great help for him to work at night to help add to our income.


Yup my DH was a SAHD and when he was a bit bored with his routine he would randomly work as a stocker. The hours are ugly, but there is a huge turnover.
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