Mr. AND Mrs.??? Opinion please!

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Forum -> Relationships -> Manners & Etiquette

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Special circumstances. How to address envelope?

Mr. and Mrs. _____

97%

[ 48 ]

Mr. _____

[ 1 ]

Total Votes : 49

amother

Seashell

Tue, Jan 12 2016, 6:58 am

My sister will iy"H be making a bar mitzvah soon. She is writing out invitations and needs your input!
There is somebody from her shul that she would like to invite whose wife is in a coma for the last year and a half. How does she address the envelope???? Mr. and Mrs.? Just Mr.?
Pls help! TY!!

Had an option for "other suggestion" idk why it didn't come up. If you have any other idea/suggestions pls share! TY!!

Sadie

Tue, Jan 12 2016, 7:02 am

To the X Family? Unless there are a bunch of kids that she doesn't want to invite..

shoshanim999

Tue, Jan 12 2016, 7:02 am

I would say just Mr. ___. If his wife is also invited he will be in an awkward position of having to respond that he will attend but his wife can't make it. That might be uncomfortable for him.

amother

Maroon

Tue, Jan 12 2016, 7:05 am

I would put Mr. & Mrs. You can't ignore the fact that he is still married to her. I think it would be more hurtful to make believe the wife isn't here.

amazingmommy

Tue, Jan 12 2016, 7:44 am

I voted for mr. And mrs. Their married.
His pain that will come up is inevitable. Regardless of what you write...

questioner

Tue, Jan 12 2016, 7:47 am

Mr. and Mrs. and with a heartfelt Perek of Tehillim as she addresses the envelope.

leah233

Tue, Jan 12 2016, 7:56 am

Definitely Mr & Mrs. To leave his wife off is writing off all hope and (figuratively)burying her while she is still alive

Moonlight

Tue, Jan 12 2016, 9:00 am

mr and mrs
still together

Ihatepotatoes

Tue, Jan 12 2016, 9:06 am

mr and mrs. and like the above poster said, daven that she should actually be able to come

amother

Royalblue

Tue, Jan 12 2016, 9:07 am

Not the same but we recently made a simcha & invited son-in-law's grandparents, grandmother recently had a stroke & I knew she was not up to traveling. I put in a note, we are davening for you & hoping to dance with you soon at simchos.

greenfire

Tue, Jan 12 2016, 10:33 am

I was going to suggest putting in a note that you are thinking of the mrs and praying for her as well. Definitely put her name on the envelope - she is still with us.

naomi2

Tue, Jan 12 2016, 12:59 pm

omg, mr and mrs. she's not dead yet!!!
how painful is that to have mr and mrs on envelopes for years and then when she's in a coma have this one push her into a grave, so to speak, by omitting her name!!!

tigerwife

Tue, Jan 12 2016, 1:22 pm

I think 'Mr. And Mrs.' is more natural than simply 'Mr.', which emphasizes that his wife cannot come and may be hurtful. With the other way who would give a second glance.

zaq

Tue, Jan 12 2016, 3:54 pm

Mr. and Mrs. Just because she's in a coma doesn't mean she wouldn't be welcome if she had a miraculous recovery. The man is still married; please don't act as if the woman is ch"v already in the grave.

Butterfly07

Tue, Jan 12 2016, 4:04 pm

I knew my friend wouldn't be able to make it to my wedding because she was in Avelus, but I still sent her an invitation and wrote her a special note on the card......
I would either do Mr & Mrs OR, as someone mentioned: The X Familiy (if not too many kids lol)

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