The 7 habits of highly EFFICIENT mom??

thegiver

Fri, Feb 12 2016, 4:10 am

how do you maximize time and attention for your kids? I feel like all I do all day is feeding, housework, clearing clutter and no time for play. my kids play on their own most of the day. suggestions to working more efficiently? (I dont mean what makes you a more effective mom but a more efficient homemaker I guess...) the mess just keeps coming back and I have a feeling this might last for years. :OOOO

I want to enjoy my kids more!

chani8

Fri, Feb 12 2016, 8:11 am

Eta - Love the title of your thread!!

Set an hourly timer to stop what you are doing and give ten minutes of undivided attention to your kids.

10 minutes every hour. Eventually it becomes a habit and you wont need the timer anymore.

It increases the family's happiness. And gives Mom satisfaction for being sufficiently attentive to her family.

WADR, I dont get how it takes so long to keep the house tidy. Maybe put a timer to limit your cleaning. With all that cleaning and spending time with your kids, where is your 'me' time? Maybe you keep too tidy a house? Consider living on the wild side and NOt folding underwear. Wink

Last edited by chani8 on Fri, Feb 12 2016, 8:43 am; edited 1 time in total

Moonlight

Fri, Feb 12 2016, 8:33 am

I stopped cleaning up between dinner and bed. (530 to 715) . I am either bathing the kids or reading to them/ playing with them. Before I go to bed I make sure dishes are done and usually sweep. I do my shopping then too. Usually I do NOT clean up the toys every night. But they would take them out the next day anyways so it doesn't bother me or Dh

observer

Fri, Feb 12 2016, 11:16 am

You sound confused in your post if you are looking for tips on being a more efficient mom who plays with the kids more, or being a more efficient homemaker.

Of course we would all like both to be perfect! But there's only so many hours in a day. So we have to prioritize.

What do I do? I put the kids before the house. I really value spending time with my kids, and I do the bare bare minimum housework while they are awake. When they are asleep, I do what I can.

It's a worthwhile investment! Before you know it, they won't be so little anymore. So if the house is not as neat as ideal for these years, it's a good trade off for happy kids.

debsey

Fri, Feb 12 2016, 12:02 pm

chani8 wrote:

Ummm.... I have 8 children. See the problem?

tichellady

Fri, Feb 12 2016, 12:25 pm

I like the book "I know how she does it". It's really meant for moms with only a few kids who make a good salary but I think a lot of the ideas can apply to anyone (especially if you can take them with a grain of salt). The author is very into keeping track of your time for a week or two to get a Sense of where you spend time the most and then figuring out how to change that if you are unhappy with the results.

Blue jay

Fri, Feb 12 2016, 2:04 pm

Rule #2 - Dont be efficient! Be intuitive... If your kid needs a hug then give them a hug. If you need a hug then tell your kid to give you a hug.

Rule #3- Break all the rules and clean with diaper wipes.

Rule #4- Dont compare yourself to anyone.

debsey

Fri, Feb 12 2016, 3:57 pm

Hire cleaning help, cook in bulk and freeze, buy non iron shirts, have a whole family Cleanup time and laying out clothes backpacks shoes for the next day - all in one time period, with mom supervising but not doing the work for them.

the world's best mom

Fri, Feb 12 2016, 4:01 pm

Some houses try to hide the fact
That children shelter there.
Ours boasts of it quite openly-
The signs are everywhere.
For smears are on the windows,
Little smudges on the doors.
I should apologize, I guess,
For toys strewn on the floor.
But I sat down with the children
And we played and laughed and read.
And if the bathtub doesn't shine
Their eyes will shine instead.
Or when, at times, I'm forced to choose
The one job or the other,
I want to have a lovely house,
But first I'll be a mother.

Author unknown

debsey

Sat, Feb 13 2016, 7:25 pm

chani8 wrote:

You dont need to give them all individualized attention. Group attention counts!

I'm actually pretty "into" individualized attention, but I steal time from other things. For example, if I have a meeting near a child's school I might take that kid out and have lunch in the car, just him and me, and there's always "special day with Mommy" for kids - if you don't invent mystery ailments every morning, then every so often you can have a day off from school to spend with me.

I don't have time for individualized attention for every single kid every single night as a "set" thing. I kind of spread my attention around as it is needed.

Evenings are pretty busy in my house, but my biggest secret is involving everyone in the cleanup and prep for the next morning. We all clean the playroom and lay out our clothes,shoes, briefcases at the same time. I find when everyone has a job (and I do mean everyone, even my 2 year old has to "help" clean up toys, he can totally chuck some Duplo into their bin.), the whole cleanup time goes much smoother.

Another HUGE help has been hiring a tutor to help out with homework time. She's not a professional special educator, just a seminary girl who comes and works with whoever needs extra help. Generally one son in particular, but it's great to have another adult there.

amother

Emerald

Sat, Feb 13 2016, 10:20 pm

getting everyone involved in nightly cleanup routine like debsey said.
we have a job chart with general areas of the house. each night each kid gets one area and needs to do their age level job in that spot. ie. if 5 yr old gets kitchen she will clear and wash table, 9 yr old would need to sweep as well.

I help as needed and 1x a month when the chart is finished we go out for ice cream.
its teaching them responsibility and cheaper than a cleaning lady to boot.

queenert

Sun, Feb 14 2016, 7:35 am

How Does She Manage by Yael Weisner has a lot of great ideas.
What I like about it is that she profiles four different personality types and each gives tips that work for them.
Ex: if you're a neat freak, the advice of don't clean up won't help you and you'll just feel guilty about what you can't change.
It's also meant for big families which makes the advice more appropriate.