At what age would you give your daughter choice of female dr

amother

Black

Tue, May 03 2016, 8:04 am

My dd is 7 years old and I am scheduling check up for her. the pediatric group has a male and female pediatrician. the male is more experienced and skilled. the female new and young. dd has been seeing the male till now and is very comfortable with him. All things equal, I would rather she be seen by him because of experience and expertise.

On the other hand, she is getting older and at some point may be more comfortable having a checkup with a woman dr. obviously she has not started developing or anything like that.

At what age would you give your daughter a choice to see the female doctor?

(I actually did give her the choice and she said the female but I think it may have been random. I will honor it anyways and I scheduled the appt with the female dr, just wondering what other mothers feel about this topic in general)

amother

Wine

Tue, May 03 2016, 8:12 am

When she doesn't feel comfortable with the male doctor. I think I was maybe 9 when my mom took me to my usual doctor and when it came time to get undressed, I expressed discomfort. At that point, the doctor said "I guess we should schedule for my partner" and so we did.

Tue, May 03 2016, 8:48 am

My daughter switchedto a female dr around bat mitzvah age, but had the choice a year or two before.

None of the docs here have the child undress completely. They can do a thorough exam with minimal embarrassment.

Miri7

Tue, May 03 2016, 8:53 am

It depends on the child. My male pediatrician offers at 10, but if a girl expresses discomfort or interest in switching, then it's probably time. If there is a specific medical issue you can always call the more experienced male doctor to get his input.

amother

Black

Tue, May 03 2016, 8:55 am

Just hope I didnt make a mistake by offering it so young, I actually really didnt think she would chooose the female but now I have to stick to it. other dr is much more experienced. bh I have no concerns though. but still...

thunderstorm

Tue, May 03 2016, 9:06 am

If the child asks that's when I would make the change, otherwise around age 12 is normal if she needs to be undressed. Otherwise, just for a throat culture or something there shouldnt be any reason not to use a male doc. I always had a male doc but his nurse practitioner was female...so sometimes he would have her check me privately if the need arose.
The same thing occurred last week with my DS..he's 13 had bladder pain and the nurse practitioner is the one that came to check...she called the doctor a male and sent us all out of the room , including her so that the male doc could check him in his private area, I didnt even request it.

amother

Wine

Tue, May 03 2016, 9:15 am

Just want to clarify my above comment, by undressed I mean to undershirt and underwear, not everything, but I was still uncomfortable with a man at that point so we switched. I still saw the male pediatrician for minor ailments such as strep that didn't require getting undressed, but from that point forward, I did my well visits and any issues of specific female concern with his female partner. If she doesn't like getting undressed in front of anyone, definitely err on the side of female. If you're concerned about experience, she can still see the male doctor if it's not going to require anything too private.

amother

Maroon

Tue, May 03 2016, 9:18 am

Bizzydizzymommy wrote:

If the child asks that's when I would make the change, otherwise around age 12 is normal if she needs to be undressed.

Agreed!! My children go to a female doctor and she told me to switch my boys to the male doctor when they were 12 because she thought they would be more comfortable. While I prefer a female ob/gyn, which I have, she should understand that they are a doctor and we shouldn't decide on their gender. I had an ultrasound done on my breasts and a vaginal ultrasound recently. I didn't have a choice and both were done by male technicians. You have to learn to get used to it. The same way I teach my children that the only ones can see or touch their privates are the doctor, I don't say a female or male doctor. A doctor is a doctor and you have to trust them or change doctors.

leopardspots

Tue, May 03 2016, 11:13 am

Having a male pediatrician and a male OB Gyn is neither here nor there. In the former case, the patients are children whose parents make decisions for them. In the latter, the patients are grown women who can fully choose whether they are comfortable having a male doctor.
I made the decision for my infant DD to have a female doctor. I absolutely hated having a male pediatrician as a child. FWIW I had a male OB Gyn. 2 separate issues.

Ema of 5

Tue, May 03 2016, 11:28 am

leopardspots wrote:

Actually, it IS here or there, because that was OPs question!! OPs question is at what point should she give her child a choice.

amother

Lavender

Tue, May 03 2016, 11:51 am

eema of 3 wrote:

Am I the only one who had a male pediatrician and male GP? I even prefer a male OB/GYN....

I prefer male doctors over females...call me crazy but I always felt they had more compassion, the female doctors always brushed me off and did not validate my concerns ets.

FranticFrummie

Tue, May 03 2016, 12:01 pm

I always gave DD the choice, as long as the doctors were equally qualified. She might like a man because he's funny and talks directly to her, or she might prefer a woman because of tznius issues.

She knows that if she needs a specialist, then she has to see the doctor who will do the best job, and that it's not a tznius issue if her health depends on it.

She started being particular about wanting to see a woman when she was around 8, but if there is a male doctor she needs to see she won't make any fuss about it at all.

Tue, May 03 2016, 12:14 pm

eema of 3 wrote:

Am I the only one who had a male pediatrician and male GP? I even prefer a male OB/GYN....

I had only male doctors (peds, GYN, primary care) until about twenty years ago. Now my docs are female, and the newer docs in our peds office are as well, reflecting the changing demographics of medicine.

I never cared one way or another about my doctors bring male or female, but my adolescent DD prefers a female doctor, which I respect.

amother

Silver

Tue, May 03 2016, 12:14 pm

I always had a male doctor... It's just what was on the plan. However, when I needed anything in private area looked at, I tried to get a female doctor. (Mole checks etc). My OB is male and I don't want to switch for anything! When I gave birth this past time they offered a male nurse but since there was an option and competency wasn't an issue- I went with a female.

I would give the option around puberty. Or they express discomfort.

mommy3b2c

Tue, May 03 2016, 12:23 pm

eema of 3 wrote:

Am I the only one who had a male pediatrician and male GP? I even prefer a male OB/GYN....

I also prefer male.

amother

Slateblue

Tue, May 03 2016, 2:04 pm

I switched my dd to a new female ped at age 10. I didn't like her at all. And for the next year switched to a new male dr.
The male was much more sensitive to her and discreet. While the woman was invasive and made my dd feel very uncomfortable ( checking her privates for no real reason)
I'll stick with the male for as long as my dd is comfortable with him.

Simple1

Tue, May 03 2016, 2:08 pm

That's an in between age, so it will depend on your daughter. You can probably ask her directly if she's OK seeing a male doctor.

It's funny how many women have no problem with a male OB, but really there are so many choices of female pediatric PAs where I am, that I automatically almost always see them.