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How do you justify Pesach programs AND tuition assistance???
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amother
Babypink


 

Post Tue, May 03 2016, 9:18 pm
This takes away from people who truly do need financial aid. If you can afford a Pesach program, you shouldn't be accepting financial aid (unless you're working at the program). If your parents offer, you should probably think twice before accepting.
This seems to be a "thing" here in the NY area, and it is disgusting.
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amother
Pearl


 

Post Tue, May 03 2016, 9:24 pm
Some people work at the programs, you know.
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amother
Babypink


 

Post Tue, May 03 2016, 9:26 pm
amother wrote:
Some people work at the programs, you know.


Obviously I am not talking about those people. Many of my friends do this, and they work hard.
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mha3484




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, May 03 2016, 9:28 pm
I opted out of my extended family vacation for years and no one offered me the cash instead. Your family wants your company not to give you money. It's not very realistic.
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imorethanamother




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, May 03 2016, 9:34 pm
Let the school administrators worry about it. If people don't pay what they should, that's on them and their souls.
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The Happy Wife




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, May 03 2016, 9:36 pm
Honestly, it's kind of rude to ask your family for the cash value of a gift. If you want to ask your family for help to pay tuition then ask. But this isn't a game show where you get to pick a gift or the cash equivalent.
As far as I'm aware, schools don't ask you to hit up all your family members for cash before accepting scholarship money.
Now if people are taking sholarships and then paying for these things themselves, that's another matter.
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amother
Babypink


 

Post Tue, May 03 2016, 9:40 pm
z
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amother
Babypink


 

Post Tue, May 03 2016, 9:40 pm
z
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amother
Chocolate


 

Post Tue, May 03 2016, 9:41 pm
Try not to judge. You don't know what is going on exactly with other people's lives.
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amother
Babypink


 

Post Tue, May 03 2016, 9:43 pm
amother wrote:
Try not to judge. You don't know what is going on exactly with other people's lives.


I can't think of any reason this would be ok. And I know that people try to pull shady business when it comes to tuition assistance sometimes.
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amother
Chocolate


 

Post Tue, May 03 2016, 9:48 pm
If you can't think of a reason, and you still judge favorably, your reward is very great.
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amother
Babypink


 

Post Tue, May 03 2016, 10:03 pm
amother wrote:
If you can't think of a reason, and you still judge favorably, your reward is very great.


Uh huh. Rolling Eyes
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amother
Firebrick


 

Post Tue, May 03 2016, 10:03 pm
Op I do t understand what you are saying.

1. How do you know that people are going to hotels and have tuition assistance are you on the tuition board?

2. You don't make any sense if someone offers you a free pesach in a hotel you should say no and stay home which will then cost you $1,000 at least after cleaning help and take out before yom tov.

Just because someone needs assistance why shouldn't they take advantage of what free offers they get in life and especially if the other option would be to stay home and actually spend money that you don't have to make pesach.

And if you are saying that a person should say no and ask for the cash value instead it doesn't work that way. The people giving the gift are offering it because they want you with them for pesach they don't care to give you cash.
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amother
Babypink


 

Post Tue, May 03 2016, 10:05 pm
amother wrote:
Op I do t understand what you are saying.

1. How do you know that people are going to hotels and have tuition assistance are you on the tuition board?

2. You don't make any sense if someone offers you a free pesach in a hotel you should say no and stay home which will then cost you $1,000 at least after cleaning help and take out before yom tov.

Just because someone needs assistance why shouldn't they take advantage of what free offers they get in life and especially if the other option would be to stay home and actually spend money that you don't have to make pesach.

And if you are saying that a person should say no and ask for the cash value instead it doesn't work that way. The people giving the gift are offering it because they want you with them for pesach they don't care to give you cash.


"Cleaning help?" Takeout?? You're cracking me up.
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seeker




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, May 03 2016, 10:10 pm
If parents offer it is usually because THEY want the experience of spending Pesach with their kids/grandkids, not [just] as a gift to the kids, and there is some very valid reason why they cannot do that at home. So asking for the money for tuition would not fill that purpose at all. So if they're inviting you and footing the bill, YOU GO.
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amother
Ivory


 

Post Tue, May 03 2016, 10:10 pm
amother wrote:
"Cleaning help?" Takeout?? You're cracking me up.
you totally missed the point of that post.
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The Happy Wife




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, May 03 2016, 10:29 pm
amother wrote:
Op I do t understand what you are saying.

1. How do you know that people are going to hotels and have tuition assistance are you on the tuition board?

2. You don't make any sense if someone offers you a free pesach in a hotel you should say no and stay home which will then cost you $1,000 at least after cleaning help and take out before yom tov.

Just because someone needs assistance why shouldn't they take advantage of what free offers they get in life and especially if the other option would be to stay home and actually spend money that you don't have to make pesach.

And if you are saying that a person should say no and ask for the cash value instead it doesn't work that way. The people giving the gift are offering it because they want you with them for pesach they don't care to give you cash.


You make a very good point. If you're short in cash and A family member offers to pay for your pesach expenses, thereby saving them money, they should decline?? Crazy.

However, (you may want to sit down for this) people actually do make pesach without cleaning help and takeout. I know, mind blowing concept. Not saying these things are bad, but why should we assume these are basics that even people with tight finances must spend on? Also, why start with a baseline of $1,00 for expenses. Yes, yes, people spend this much, more, but why is this mentioned as the baseline?

Op, do you think that if families getting tuition assistance should also decline and ask for the cash equivalent when parents invite them for all of yontif? What if their parents are wealthy and have a very opulent pesach at home? Should they go, but say "Mommy, Totty, my husband and I and the kids would all like to forgo our tongue portions this year and take the cash equivalent instead. We also plan to water down our wine and grape juice a little, so maybe you can give us an extra hundred while you're at it?"

It's so funny. When people complain that their wealthy family members don't help pay for their expenses, they're selfish money grubbers.
When you don't ask wealthy family members for money, you're selfish scammers abusing scholarship money.

Guess you can't win.
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zigi




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, May 03 2016, 10:34 pm
what is the real price of a hotel? nyc area
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justforfun87




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, May 03 2016, 10:38 pm
Listen, my in laws are generous when it comes to things they want to give us. This may include cleaning help, house update, etc. Probably costing them 500-1000 a year. They would not just give us money for tuition though. I am in no place though to tell them how to spend their money. If they offered me a free vacation I would jump right on it!
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amother
Saddlebrown


 

Post Tue, May 03 2016, 11:22 pm
I know of one school that writes to the parents at the beginning of the year and tells them outright that anyone who goes away for Pesach will not be eligible for tuition breaks. Sure, the grandparents want everyone together, but they don't get to use community tzedaka money for that.
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