Parenting with Love and Logic.... Have you read it? Reviews?

amother

Green

Mon, Jun 06 2016, 11:56 am

Here is one review

Quote:

3.0 out of 5 starsGood ideas but some extreme examples
By N. L. L. Sofer on September 16, 2012
Format: Hardcover
I do agree with the concept behind the book and I have already had some great experiences using the techniques with my 2-1/2 yr old son in the past couple of months. I want to offer him some control over limited choices and allow him to experience the consequences of bad choices. I've been calmer and more empathetic with him and we have all enjoyed the new atmosphere. We have a great little guy, and these authors offer some great advice for gradually entrusting him with bigger and bigger decisions. We want to make sure he takes ownership of his actions but we want to enjoy his childhood with him and not be stressed out trying to dominate him.

I'm dismayed, though, by some of their "success" stories. A good many of them involve not letting the kid eat. Even a toddler is supposed to get the connection between having thrown food at the table and going hungry overnight. Is a 2-yr-old developmentally able to even process "I'm miserable because I'm hungry", let alone"I'm hungry because I chose not to behave at the table"? And as he ages, am I supposed to stay up all night, guarding the kitchen, to make sure he doesn't just fill up on junk food after he missed dinner playing his video game? What kind of consequence is that?

Another success story involved a 12-yr-old foster child who was left alone at a shopping center for 5 hours because, chronically late, he didn't make it to the agreed-upon meeting place when they were ready to leave. Is that even legal?

And what about misbehavior that doesn't always come with its own consequences? We've all heard of bullies who get away with tormenting others for years with no ill effects on their own lives. I'm supposed to mind my own business, sure that one day my son will wake up to his misdeeds, if I see him pounding on the smaller kids in the neighborhood? Sounds like a cop-out to me.

For a book with 4.3 stars, you usually see less than 11% 1 star ratings.

saw50st8

Mon, Jun 06 2016, 12:15 pm

I really like the concepts. I find with parenting books, I take the parts that I think will fit into my lifestyle and parenting.

I definitely do the food thing. I serve one thing for dinner and that's it (usually it's protein, carb, veg or something). I have some picky eaters and some not picky eaters and the picky eaters understand that they can choose to eat or not. It's their choice. I don't engage in food battles. My kids usually end up eating though!

It's a good read. It's about teaching your children to own their problems, make choices and understand the consequences of those choices and learn to do better. Saving your kids every time they make a mistake doesn't solve anything. Letting them go out without a jacket when it's cold will teach them that it's cold out and a jacket would keep them warm!

Do you have a library where you are? If so, try it.