It takes me over an hour to get my 2 year old to sleep!

allthingsblue

Tue, Jul 19 2016, 8:56 pm

Until a few days ago my son would go into his crib happily after a bedtime story. I'd lay next to him for 5-20 minutes and he'd be asleep.
The past few days it's been an hour or more to get him to sleep! If I leave the room while he is awake he'd freak out and scream.
I put him in between 7:45-8. On shabbos and Saturday night, when he went in between 8:30-9, he fell asleep right away- but I'm not going to wait until 8:30- 9 to put him to bed every day. That's ridiculous for a two year old, isn't it?
Any suggestions?

chicco

Tue, Jul 19 2016, 9:02 pm

It may be ridiculous, but taking so long to put him to bed is worse. At the end of the day, to some degree you have to work with his sleep patterns. If he's not tired enough, forcing the issue won't help either of you. Does he nap? Try skipping it if he does. If not, try to tucker him out more before you want to put him to bed. Or try putting him down later for a couple days and see how that goes. Toddlers often go through these small phases of turning their sleep habits upside down. Chances are it will sort itself out within a few days.

I hope this situation improves soon!

miami85

Tue, Jul 19 2016, 9:11 pm

First question is: What time does he wake up? When he went to bed 8:30-9pm did you see a difference in his wake up time? Does he nap?

I had to learn the hard way that normal amounts of sleep for 2-3 year olds according to parents.com (and I've seen similar charts) is:

2-3 years
Total Sleep: 12-14 hours
Nighttime Sleep: 10-11 hours
Naps: 1-2 hours (1 nap)

so if a child is going to sleep 8pm and waking up at 6, that's 10 hours. If he's going to sleep at 9 and waking up at 7am, then that's also technically fine.

Yes, I lose out on my evenings, but I save my sanity by putting my 3-5 year olds to bed at 8:30-9pm b/c then they sleep until 7. That's 10 hours.

Frankly, 2 year-olds don't like going to sleep, so its not too suprising that he's putting up a fuss. The closer you put him to bed to a natural "sleepy" point the more success you'll have.

allthingsblue

Tue, Jul 19 2016, 9:14 pm

He naps in day camp, I'm not sure what time that is- not later than 1:30.

He wakes up at close to 7 on a good day, before 6 on a "bad" day.
I haven't noticed a pattern of him waking up later if he does to sleep later, but I will definitely check that out.

tryinghard

Tue, Jul 19 2016, 9:20 pm

When DD was 2, I had a similar situation, except she was in a bed (climbing out pretty early on) so it was harder, cuz she would just pop back out of bed every time I thought it was safe to leave. Without exaggeration, she would often stay up as late as 9 or 10 - with my trying to put her in from 7:30 and on!

What finally worked was actually putting her in at 6 PM. It turned out, she was overtired. When I moved bedtime back, I was shocked to find that she started falling asleep within 5 minutes. Try putting your son in early - you never know!

As an aside, Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child by Dr. Kenneth Weissbluth explains a lot about sleep cycles in children, and I have found it extremely helpful for both babies and older children.

pesek zman

Tue, Jul 19 2016, 9:34 pm

I'm sorry but it sounds like he's manipulating you. I hear you say that if you leave while he's awake, he screams. But so what? He's not sick, he's not in pain, he's screaming because he wants you to stay, which is valid, except it doesn't work for you. I don't think his schedule is to 'blame' I think that you are (well intentioned) perpetuating this cycle. If you want to see a change, consider sleep training. I don't think it's ever too old. Read Ferber or consider CIO. Best of luck

Miri7

Tue, Jul 19 2016, 11:20 pm

tryinghard wrote:

Yes, this. I have had the same experience. These summer months are also the hardest when it's light out so late.