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Spoke Lashon Hara About Coworker



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chaos




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Aug 12 2016, 2:15 pm
I spoke lashon hara about a coworker. It was completely wrong of me. There were no mitigating circumstances (eg. it wasn't the honest but necessary feedback about job performance that would be needed to make a decision). It was completely and utterly uncalled for. It won't get back to her and it isn't something that will affect her job performance in anyway and she'll never find out that it ever happened. Still, I feel terrible about it. Is there any way to apologize? Is an apology in this instance worse? Is there any way to make up for it?
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bluebird




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Aug 12 2016, 2:57 pm
Apologizing will make it worse if your coworker is not aware of the conversation, because then she will be hurt.

What you could do now is find ways to try to repair the damage your words may have done, such as causing the person you told to think less of your coworker. How to do this depends on what was said, but maybe you can say positive but neutral things about her to the coworker you spoke lashon hara to.
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ra_mom




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Aug 12 2016, 3:00 pm
Do nice things for her. The more you give someone the more you like them.
Good for you for being so introspective and righting wrongs!
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chaos




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Aug 12 2016, 3:09 pm
I like your suggestion, bluebird. There are positive things about this coworker that I could share to the other coworkers I spoke lashon hara to in order to mitigate the damage to her reputation.
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debsey




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Aug 12 2016, 4:18 pm
Both bluebird and ramom gave you good advice, OP. U could also resolve to sign up for one of those daily shemiras halashon reminders.
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