Home
Log in / Sign Up
    Private Messages   Advanced Search   Rules   New User Guide   FAQ   Advertise   Contact Us  
Forum -> Chinuch, Education & Schooling
My daughter is failing and no one told me
Previous  1  2



Post new topic   Reply to topic View latest: 24h 48h 72h

amother
Pumpkin


 

Post Tue, Aug 16 2016, 4:37 pm
So nice to see all the replies and so good to know I'm not the only one out there that is good no thru this
Back to top

sunnshine770




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 16 2016, 7:13 pm
Tutoring starts tomorrow..B'H
New school will be working with her. Still not sure about grade placement....find out next week.
I do work with all my children in everything they need. I really try even though I am so busy. (I work 2 jobs) My daughter is a good kid with great middos and a good learner...B'H. She always does her homework. But, I knew she would be behind....I did expect it. The old school was not good and it was a really horrible year last year.
No homework....no tests coming home....report cards come late Feb.
2 different teachers quitting during same year.
I called....I emailed....I had meetings.

We gave her work to do but my problem was I focused on the secular. This is the class with no stable teacher. My assumption was at least Judaics is ok. I thought at least she is learning that well. But nope...2 grades behind in Judaics.

You want to hear the craziest part? I have a child with an IEP that has been attending public school. This will be his first year in a Jewish school. Guess what? He is only a grade behind for secular and Judaics. I knew he would be behind in secular.....his public school teacher told me his struggles....his report card states it clearly. I expected him to be significantly behind in Judaics because he only learns it at home but no...only a grade behind. Does that even make sense?

Let me tell you....after testing the kids I was in a state of shock. My son did so much better than I expected B'H and my daughter much worse than I expected.

But bottom line....something very wrong in the old school. I do take responsibility....I never should have trusted that school!
Back to top

amother
Violet


 

Post Tue, Aug 16 2016, 7:31 pm
sunnshine770 wrote:
Tutoring starts tomorrow..B'H
New school will be working with her. Still not sure about grade placement....find out next week.
I do work with all my children in everything they need. I really try even though I am so busy. (I work 2 jobs) My daughter is a good kid with great middos and a good learner...B'H. She always does her homework. But, I knew she would be behind....I did expect it. The old school was not good and it was a really horrible year last year.
No homework....no tests coming home....report cards come late Feb.
2 different teachers quitting during same year.
I called....I emailed....I had meetings.

We gave her work to do but my problem was I focused on the secular. This is the class with no stable teacher. My assumption was at least Judaics is ok. I thought at least she is learning that well. But nope...2 grades behind in Judaics.

You want to hear the craziest part? I have a child with an IEP that has been attending public school. This will be his first year in a Jewish school. Guess what? He is only a grade behind for secular and Judaics. I knew he would be behind in secular.....his public school teacher told me his struggles....his report card states it clearly. I expected him to be significantly behind in Judaics because he only learns it at home but no...only a grade behind. Does that even make sense?

Let me tell you....after testing the kids I was in a state of shock. My son did so much better than I expected B'H and my daughter much worse than I expected.

But bottom line....something very wrong in the old school. I do take responsibility....I never should have trusted that school!



Sorry op, I'm just not buying it. If a parent spends 15 minutes studying with their child in ANY SUBJECT, the parent would have a pretty good idea of where the child is holding. The only way you didn't know where your child was holding in judaics is if you didn't spend 15 minutes studying with her the entire year or at least months at a time. So while the school did a poor job, I don't think you're completely off the hook either.
Back to top

MamaBear




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 16 2016, 7:40 pm
Is it possible your daughter tested poorly because she was very nervous? Perhaps she is not so far behind.
Back to top

WhatFor




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 16 2016, 8:04 pm
amother wrote:
Sorry op, I'm just not buying it. If a parent spends 15 minutes studying with their child in ANY SUBJECT, the parent would have a pretty good idea of where the child is holding. The only way you didn't know where your child was holding in judaics is if you didn't spend 15 minutes studying with her the entire year or at least months at a time. So while the school did a poor job, I don't think you're completely off the hook either.


What's your end-game over here, O' Brave Amother, using your cloak of anonymity to shame the OP who is clearly doing everything she can at this point in time to help her children with their education?

OP- you sound like an amazing mom who cares tremendously about your children and their education. Hugs and wishing you and your children all the best!!
Back to top

Leahh




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 16 2016, 8:08 pm
amother wrote:
Sorry op, I'm just not buying it. If a parent spends 15 minutes studying with their child in ANY SUBJECT, the parent would have a pretty good idea of where the child is holding. The only way you didn't know where your child was holding in judaics is if you didn't spend 15 minutes studying with her the entire year or at least months at a time. So while the school did a poor job, I don't think you're completely off the hook either.

I'm sorry but I don't agree with you at all.
A parent can spend time reviewing work with a child and the child can know it well. But the parent does not have the same comparison as the teacher to know how the child is doing in relation to all the other children in the class.
My child's teacher called me that he is behind in reading. I was shocked. I read with him every day. He knows the words, he comprehends what he reads... she said yea, he knows all that but he's not reading with the same fluency as the other boys in the class. If not for the teacher calling me how was I to ever know that and be able to spend more time working with him? Had the teacher not called me and I was looking to switch schools like op, I could be in the same shocked state as her after the new school tested my child. Luckily the teacher DID call me as is her responsibility!
It's 100% the teachers responsibility to reach out to a parent if a child is not on the same level as the class. And the report card should definitely reflect that as well.
Back to top

amother
Jetblack


 

Post Tue, Aug 16 2016, 8:14 pm
sunnshine770 wrote:

...
You want to hear the craziest part? I have a child with an IEP that has been attending public school. This will be his first year in a Jewish school. Guess what? He is only a grade behind for secular and Judaics. I knew he would be behind in secular.....his public school teacher told me his struggles....his report card states it clearly. I expected him to be significantly behind in Judaics because he only learns it at home but no...only a grade behind. Does that even make sense?...


Of course it makes sense. He is being taught by trained educators and evaluated continually. The good learning habits that are instilled transfer over to other studies. He is learning how to learn, that is what professionals add to children's educations.
Back to top

amother
Pewter


 

Post Wed, Aug 17 2016, 4:16 am
You gave enough info for me to possibly identify that my daughter was in the same class, not sure where you're putting your daughter this year but obviously what you say is your opinion and mine is mine. I could be wrong school too.
The secular teacher situation was bad but was not the schools fault. The teachers did not quit because of the school. The first left because of a family situation and the second presented herself falsely and could not do the job.
Regarding Judaic studies, this class has had really amazing teachers the past few years, it's possible that either your daughter has a learning issue that fell under the radar, which would be a combination of blame between school and home. It could be she was nervous by testing, it could also be the new school has more access to gov't funding for services and is making it seem like it's needed. I've seen it happen to a few kids.
Not every kid fits every school, I've moved kids around as every kid is different, your son and daughter shouldn't be compared. The fact that you are comparing is very bad for your children.
It really irks me when parent blame schools entirely for their kids problems!
I have also worked in different situations where I see that although parents are told things and schools have proof that parents were told, they will go and tell the world that the school failed them, knowing the school can never defend itself as many things are totally confidential.( not necessarily this school, any school).
I'm not saying that thats your situation, but things are never as black and white as you claim here. Blaming a school will never help you or your kid.
You also didn't start the new year, so the rosy new school may not be as rosy as you think.
Every school has their issues, every kid has different needs.
Back to top

amother
Violet


 

Post Wed, Aug 17 2016, 5:41 am
Leahh wrote:
I'm sorry but I don't agree with you at all.
A parent can spend time reviewing work with a child and the child can know it well. But the parent does not have the same comparison as the teacher to know how the child is doing in relation to all the other children in the class.
My child's teacher called me that he is behind in reading. I was shocked. I read with him every day. He knows the words, he comprehends what he reads... she said yea, he knows all that but he's not reading with the same fluency as the other boys in the class. If not for the teacher calling me how was I to ever know that and be able to spend more time working with him? Had the teacher not called me and I was looking to switch schools like op, I could be in the same shocked state as her after the new school tested my child. Luckily the teacher DID call me as is her responsibility!
It's 100% the teachers responsibility to reach out to a parent if a child is not on the same level as the class. And the report card should definitely reflect that as well.



Your explanation is possible but the far more probable reason why the op was shocked that her child is behind is because she never studied with her. I just don't see the overwhelming majority of parents who work with their kids at home, completely oblivious that they are 2 full grades behind. Possible, but very unlikely. Not to mention, the op gave several reasons why she thought her child was doing ok. She never included that she works with the child at home.
Back to top

sky




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Aug 17 2016, 6:03 am
there are different measurements of success between schools. Like one school may expect them to read 40 words per minute with 2 mistakes while the other may expect 60 words with 1 mistake (just examples). Or one school may expect the kids to figure out a word in the chumash using dikduk and shorashim and put a lot of emphasis on that , and another just has the kids repeat the words and memorize the translation while putting emphasis on understanding what is going on. It could just be a difference in expectations.

to the OP's defense - I do homework with my kids and read with them almost nightly - Hebrew and English. For one grade I was told we should put him in a smaller classroom for one subject (BEST THING EVER!!). I was in shock because to me he seemed to be doing great.
But I didn't know how fast they were expecting him to read, how many errors. he was my oldest and I didn't know the measuring stick they use to determine good reading or not.
Even this year I read tehillim with my 4th grader at least 4 - 5 nights a week. I think he is doing great. According to his school he is still reading slower than he should with slightly more errors than expected. I would never know. Unless you have an exact measuring stick and timing every reading it is hard to know where a child actually is.
Back to top

Leahh




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Aug 17 2016, 6:58 am
amother wrote:
Your explanation is possible but the far more probable reason why the op was shocked that her child is behind is because she never studied with her. I just don't see the overwhelming majority of parents who work with their kids at home, completely oblivious that they are 2 full grades behind. Possible, but very unlikely. Not to mention, the op gave several reasons why she thought her child was doing ok. She never included that she works with the child at home.

OP did say she does homework with her children.
Again, if what the child does at home seems ok, she has no way of knowing the majority of the class is 2 steps ahead. It's not the mothers responsibility to make math sheets to do with her child if the teacher doesn't see it necessary to send home homework.
I stand my ground and I think you need to relax on this poor mother. She needed to vent. Let her!
Back to top
Page 2 of 2 Previous  1  2 Recent Topics




Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum -> Chinuch, Education & Schooling

Related Topics Replies Last Post
Daughter was waitlisted at NJ high schools, what to do?
by amother
17 Today at 7:01 am View last post
Vaccuum mop two in one help me find a good one
by amother
6 Mon, Mar 25 2024, 6:33 pm View last post
Tell us about your theme this year! (If you had one)
by amother
17 Mon, Mar 25 2024, 12:54 pm View last post
No one comes to us to deliver
by amother
13 Fri, Mar 22 2024, 7:03 am View last post
Help! I have an agressive one
by amother
9 Thu, Mar 21 2024, 8:02 pm View last post