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Help My Baby Sleep Better



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amother
Khaki


 

Post Mon, Sep 05 2016, 7:31 pm
It's 10:18. I bathed and fed him at 8:05, for about 20 minutes and he fell asleep. I didn't move him, just gently slid myself off the bed.

At 8:53 he woke up crying. I figured I'll bf the other side, about 15 minutes and he drowsed off in a light sleep so I transfered him to his stroller *problem #1*, wheeled him a few and he fell asleep again.

10:18, he's up again. After wheeling his stroller back and forth for about 10 minutes, he's asleep for we'll-see-how-long.

So obviously the problem here is multifaceted. First, the wheeling which leads to putting him to sleep in the stroller. Second, the constant wakings.

Had I been in bed already, I would just succumb to his crying and feed him yet again, just so he and I can continue sleeping (which happens on most night).

I need to break these habits. I wish I'd known how.

I'm in middle of reading The Baby Whisperer. I like her EASY method and I pretty much put my baby on such a schedule. Now what?!
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amother
Cyan


 

Post Mon, Sep 05 2016, 8:07 pm
The No Cry Sleep Solution (Elizabeth Pantley) addresses this directly.

Basically, your baby now thinks he needs to eat or be wheeled in order to fall asleep.

On one hand, that's great! They make him sleepy, they are comforting and comfortable!

But people tend to wake up for a few seconds throughout the night, and if your baby doesn't know how to fall asleep without help, he is going to cry for you.

She gives a few suggestions, but this was the best one for me:

Pay attention when wheeling or nursing. When baby is ALMOST asleep, gently break suction or stop wheeling. Baby will PROBABLY protest at first. Nurse again, for a few seconds (I found 15-20 worked for me), and break suction again. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Until baby falls asleep without nursing/movement.

After you do this for a few days, baby gets the idea that he doesn't NEED the movement or the nursing to fall asleep. This way, when he wakes up for a few seconds, he can fall right back to sleep on his own.

There are more tips in the book, but that's the general gist.
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amother
Khaki


 

Post Mon, Sep 05 2016, 8:21 pm
I just wheeled for 4 minutes again...

Thanks for the reply, amother above. Yes, I generally try to stop wheeling before he's tight asleep for the exact reason cited above. But the minute I stop, the crying begins again. Almost as if he was waiting for the chance to start crying again....

Any other helpful tips from that book? I can probably buy it and put it in the stack of my parenting, sleeping, feeding books. It's an ever growing pile with little time to actually peruse them.
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amother
Khaki


 

Post Mon, Sep 05 2016, 8:29 pm
And I'm nursing him!!!! Almost like a cruel joke!!
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gp2.0




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Sep 05 2016, 8:39 pm
How old is your baby?
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amother
Cyan


 

Post Mon, Sep 05 2016, 8:39 pm
I'll have to open the book again and see if I can find any new tips.

But the main one is to REPEAT REPEAT REPEAT a million times until baby falls asleep on his own. Yes this takes a LONG time at first. I've had to dedicate a few days to being consistent with it before it works.
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amother
Khaki


 

Post Mon, Sep 05 2016, 8:47 pm
gp2.0 wrote:
How old is your baby?


6 months bh
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mommy3b2c




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Sep 05 2016, 8:58 pm
amother wrote:
And I'm nursing him!!!! Almost like a cruel joke!!


Don't feel so bad. I'm nursing my baby for the fourth time since I put him to sleep at 8:00. It's the same every night. In a few minutes I'll put him down in my bed and then go sleep with my husband for the next couple of hours. Then he'll wake up again, I'll join him in my bed and well sleep together till the morning. All through the night he'll nurse as he pleases. And he's one year old kneinahara.
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baby12x




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Sep 06 2016, 5:13 am
This sounds like me for the past week. I'm so incredibly tired and frustrated!
I'm just trying to do the no-cry sleep solution and daven very hard.
No success so far.
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amother
Jetblack


 

Post Tue, Sep 06 2016, 5:38 am
Sounds like me for the last 10 months.... Smile
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Tel Tzion Ima




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Sep 06 2016, 6:12 am
OP - was it always like this or recent? I find when my kids wake up frequently, it's time to get checked for an ear infection.

You could always just leave him to cry it out. If he's fed, clean diaper, burped, etc. he may just need to learn to fall back asleep on his own. If you always nurse or wheel, then he's going to always expect you to nurse or wheel. If you don't want to nurse or wheel, then stop.
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amother
Taupe


 

Post Wed, Sep 07 2016, 2:26 am
If your gentler sleep approaches aren't working, I recommend some type of cry it out method - either a more gentle gradual one like 'ferberizing' in the book "Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems" by Dr. Richard Ferber or a quicker more direct one like in this book "Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child" by Dr. Marc Weissbluth.

For the record, we did the cry it out from "Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child" and it worked great for us, helped us get our baby to sleep from basically 7 pm to 7 am every day (with feedings in between), and when she woke up for feedings she immediately went back to sleep with no assistance from us and no crying.

Even if you don't want to do any cry it out, "Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child" was a lifesaver for us, because it really delves deeply into developing healthy sleep habits in general, and also really explains what a baby's normal sleep patterns/scehdules/habits are at each age - knowign what to expect made it much easier to get our baby to sleep. Obviously, no two babies are the same, but it was helpful to know the average for how much, how often, and how long a baby sleeps.

Good luck!
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amother
Denim


 

Post Wed, Sep 07 2016, 3:15 am
Is this real crying that does not stop in a minute or two?

When babies cycle through lighter levels of sleep, they make kvetchy sounds, complete with facial expressions, that make the baby look and sound distressed. An attentive mother assumes the baby is awake and crying and needs to be picked up.

I found (anon because I frequently discuss this in real life) that as much as it hurt (me), I had to ignore anything that sounded like crying unless it went on for a bit. If I picked up the baby right away, I was paradoxically waking her up more and feeding into an untenable sleepless situation for us both. If I let her settle naturally, her sleep was uninterrupted and we were both in much better shape in the morning.
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amother
Puce


 

Post Wed, Sep 07 2016, 6:17 am
"Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child" by Dr. Marc Weissbluth. We tried the baby whisperer at 6months and I ended up keeping parts of that, but mostly going with "Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child" by Dr. Marc Weissblluth was very helpful. cry it out (with going in only to give paci in our situation). He cried at most 15-18 minutes the first night. We also followed his suggestion of the baby going to sleep early. Ours usually goes to sleep around 7, 7:30 latest. Every baby is different though, but I think it's worth trying.
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naomi2




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Sep 07 2016, 7:22 am
maybe baby should sleep in the same crib every night in a very dark quiet room, or with low white noise machine
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tryinghard




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Sep 07 2016, 7:42 am
amother wrote:

Even if you don't want to do any cry it out, "Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child" was a lifesaver for us, because it really delves deeply into developing healthy sleep habits in general, and also really explains what a baby's normal sleep patterns/scehdules/habits are at each age - knowign what to expect made it much easier to get our baby to sleep. Obviously, no two babies are the same, but it was helpful to know the average for how much, how often, and how long a baby sleeps.

Good luck!


This. I LOVE THIS BOOK. I found it so helpful in learning to read babies' tired signals, because by the time a baby is yawning, they are actually overtired. Overall, though, the best thing about this book is that it's flexible: wanna cry-it-out? He has a method. Don't want to? He has techniques for you as well.
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greenfire




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Sep 07 2016, 8:05 am
if your baby falls asleep after nursing only on one side ... wake him up by changing the diaper and burping and feeding him on the other side - before allowing him to fall asleep

he will sleep better & longer than when you feed him half way

get a swing instead of being married to the stroller - old habits die hard
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