Is my baby nurse being unreasonable or am I

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Forum -> Household Management

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amother

Chartreuse

Thu, Nov 03 2016, 9:29 am

I nurse and cuddle my baby for 1- 1:20hr every 3 hrs. I also take my baby with me for 2 hrs every morning. I expect the baby nurse to take care of herself in that time. (I asked her not to eat in her room) I also offer her an hr to go out most afternoons.
It is so upsetting to me that she stays in her room while I nurse baby and then at 57 minutes will head to the kitchen or bathroom so that she is unavailable to take baby when I'm ready to bring her back. I did mention a few days ago that I need her to be available mornings so I can get the kids off to school. Still she sleeps for 50 min while I nurse and then heads to the bathroom and will shower and... for 45min. Then relax for 2 hrs while I'm out.
This morning when I saw her heading to the bathroom I said if u wait a few minutes I'll be ready to give u baby. She looked annoyed.
Am I wrong? Or is there something I can say to let her know this isn't working?

amother

Pewter

Thu, Nov 03 2016, 9:32 am

amother wrote:

Try giving her a written schedule so she knows how the day should look.

groovy1224

Thu, Nov 03 2016, 9:36 am

amother wrote:

She is your employee; so no it's not unreasonable for you to need her to do the job. She needs to manage her free time better- not start eating lunch with 3 minutes left to her break.

If she can't deal with it, she should find a new job. She's a baby nurse and gets all offended when you want to hand her the baby? Is she for real?

Obviously I wasn't there when you guys established her responsibilities and hours, but assuming you were clear and honest about what you need and she agreed, then no, you are not being unreasonable.

iyar

Thu, Nov 03 2016, 1:39 pm

No, you're not being unreasonable.
When you take baby for his 1 - 1:20 hr nurse and cuddle, let's say at 2 pm, tell baby nurse, "I'll be ready to give baby back to you between 3 and 3:15. Please be ready to take him then as I need to do my nails/ put up supper/ do my online classes/ lay down and nap/ go pick up older sibling/ at that time."

agreer

Thu, Nov 03 2016, 2:35 pm

yes, she is being unreasonable...although that's not the word I'd use... more like lazy, taking advantage, etc.

zaq

Thu, Nov 03 2016, 3:26 pm

agreer wrote:

yes, she is being unreasonable...although that's not the word I'd use... more like lazy, taking advantage, etc.

add "manipulative"

Lani22

Thu, Nov 03 2016, 3:30 pm

Well what's the point of having her!!! You must switch nurses or make it very clear that this is not working!

groovy1224

Thu, Nov 03 2016, 3:38 pm

iyar wrote:

No, you're not being unreasonable.
When you take baby for his 1 - 1:20 hr nurse and cuddle, let's say at 2 pm, tell baby nurse, "I'll be ready to give baby back to you between 3 and 3:15. Please be ready to take him then [b]as I need to do my nails/ put up supper/ do my online classes/ lay down and nap/ go pick up older sibling/ at that time.[b]"

I agree with this up to the bolded. You do NOT need to tell her what you will be doing. You could be counting the ceiling tiles, it's non of her business.

el2cg

Thu, Nov 03 2016, 3:52 pm

Please give her clear instructions again and give her another day...otherwise call the agency for a new one. I had a nurse that did not follow my instructions either. She woke me up at night to nurse the baby when a specifically said l need you to give the baby a bottle by next feeding...she asked me for personal items and asked me to pay for her phone bill online...these were just a few examples. The agency offered to send me someone else but I wasnt in the mood of dealing with someone new for short term ( 2 weeks). Big mistake! I should have not been so concerned of hurting her feelings at my expense.

Reesa

Thu, Nov 03 2016, 4:28 pm

Sounds like it's time to switch nurses. You are wasting your money. I have had such great nurses. You can do better

amother

Lime

Thu, Nov 03 2016, 4:54 pm

She's being completely unreasonable and unhelpful. It may be time for a new nurse. There are some amazing ones out there.

I've had 13 baby nurses over the years. It's luck.

Very very very very often even the better baby nurses will try to test their boundaries after a certain amount of time, and will take serious advantage when they see you bend to their rules. Tell her exactly what to do, calmly. Remember that her job is to help. If she continues to test you in other areas, it's time for a new nurse.

debbie321

Thu, Nov 03 2016, 5:06 pm

mime did something similar
...caused me such agony but I was too meek to say anything..and I wasted my money....u should either tell her something, or tell agency...and if doesnt shape up, get a new 1

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