Breaking Thumb Sucking Habit

chani8

Mon, Nov 14 2016, 5:35 am

Impacting his social development?? Really?? I cant imagine that to be an accurate statement. Kids often do not care that their friends suck their thumbs. And if they do mock the thumb-sucker, and the thumb-sucker cares, then the thumb sucker will have social pressure as a motivation to stop sucking his thumb. Mother and teacher need to mind their own business. Do NOT make this a point of shame.

Iymnok

Mon, Nov 14 2016, 5:48 am

I agree with Chani8, too many girls in my daughters' classes suck their thumbs that it's socially accepted. To their orthodontic detriment.
It's really nit a social problem.
If it bothers the teacher or you, you need to let go of it and not let it ruin your relationship.
The stress of dd8's teacher (at age 4) animosity towards her thumb sucking made it worse.
The acceptance the next year made it less in public.

Tzutzie

Mon, Nov 14 2016, 7:45 am

I think the teacher meant that she doesn't socialize when shes busy sucking. Ive seen that. Kids end up on the sidelines.

Still I beleive to let it go and let nature run it's course. But there is also the risk of thumb sucking at an advanced age.
Someone I know is still thumb sucking at close to 50 years of age.... all that is needed is a book and to be locked in a room.....

mommy24

Mon, Nov 14 2016, 8:06 am

I have had a few kids suck their thumbs. With my first I was so nervous, what would other kids think, the braces I will need to pay for later in life, etc. My pediatrician, at the time, told me I have to stop. DC was 3 already. I tried all the advice everyone gave me, I can't even remember them now, but putting hot sauce was definitely one of them, this kid loves that! Either way nothing worked and after a while I just gave up, DC just wasn't ready to give it up. So I let it go. By 4, on his own there was no more thumb sucking in school, only in bed at night. By 5, he was done, completely. Understand never bothered him about after the initial time when I saw he just wasn't ready. With my next thumb sucker, I decided to go the same route. When she was ready she would stop. And slowly she stopped during day and only at night or when she got upset. My new pediatrician said not to do anything, eventually she would stop on her own. A well meaning relative, decided to use my daughter as guinea pig in an experiment (psych assignment)he needed to do for school and started some sort of chart for her not to suck her thumb. I wasn't happy. Since I was just ignoring the thumb sucking. Well his intervention made it ten times worse and she began sucking her thumb constantly afterwards. At around 7 years old, she decided to work on it and stopped on her own. It was hard but she felt it was the right time and wanted to stop.
So my point is, like other posters said above, best advice is let nature run it's course. When your child feels embarrassed,or feels he doesn't need it anymore, he will most likely stop. When he shows signs of readiness to stop help him, but really try to let it go for now and try not to intervene.

amother

Purple

Mon, Nov 14 2016, 9:09 am

2 of my kids sucked their thumb at that age. One never did it in school but the other would. It kept him from socially interacting and just stood on side of room sucking his thumb and not participating. With his agreement and treats I would put a bandaid on his thumb to remind him just during school day. We would take it off when he came home. When he was older and showed an interest to stop altogether I used the bitter tasting nail polish which worked immediately.

miami85

Mon, Nov 14 2016, 9:20 am

From a semi-professional point of view (Involved in education but not a doctor/dentist and I haven't done formal research on the topic), I had a few friends who sucked their thumb for a LONG time--well into grade school, one eventually needed an orthodontic appliance to end the habit as it had impacted her oral structures, but the others stopped on her own and never needed braces (for a long time it was a joke that I ended up with braces and she didn't). They were highly social and popular otherwise. All did it probably for a comfort measure. Two are now married and have careers, the other not but for personal reasons.Thus, my experience is that most kids do grow out of it eventually and there may or may not be consequences. Many children out grow it when their hands get busier than they have time to suck their thumb, and many stop due to social pressures. However, it didn't necessarily impact their future or social "ranking" in grade school. Unless b/c there were 3 of them we were super accepting. I'm also willing to bet that I'm among the few people that still remember them for this habit--and only b/c this thread came up.

FranticFrummie

Mon, Nov 14 2016, 9:57 am

3.5 is really young. DD didn't give up her paci until that age.

I think it's important for little kids to have a self soothing technique. Kids who don't know how to self regulate when they are overwhelmed are the ones who have meltdowns and tantrums all the time. When kids eventually stop, they have the comfort of knowing that their thumbs are always with them, if they ever need them. Heck, when I quit smoking I kept a pack of cigs in the freezer, "just in case", and it helped keep me from going back. Eventually I forgot about them, and threw them out when I cleaned for Pesach. It's the exact same thing.

If a child is sucking his/her thumb instead of interacting, it's because they are feeling the need for some down time. Leave them alone, and they will socialize when they are feeling up to it. Forcing the issue will only make things worse.

sky

Mon, Nov 14 2016, 10:23 am

I had a thumb sucker who stopped at 6 years old. And it took a lot of hard work and perseverance on her part (and a great prize at the end).

I would think that at 3.5 it would be almost impossible.

I do hear about it impacting life. When my daughter sucked her thumb she zoned out and entered her own world. It definitely could have an impact socially and educationally.

Probably at 3.5 we did work on not sucking at certain times and discussing when it was appropriate and not appropriate (in her language). I would gentle remind her to stop, we had a sign word - and when I would say it she would stop - even if only for a few minutes. Her teacher would also gently remind her sometimes, but not always. My goal was that she shouldn't be sucking 24\7.

sky

Mon, Nov 14 2016, 11:21 am

I'm not sure I would use bitter tasting nail polish on a child that young. I did use it for my daughter, but she was older and wanted it. it tastes really bad and once you get the taste in your mouth its hard to get rid of (I tried it myself). It isn't recommended for under 3. but I'm not sure I'd start before a child has a real desire to stop on their own.

shanie5

Mon, Nov 14 2016, 8:32 pm

I tried stopping my kids thumb sucking. Never ever worked. They all gave up eventually, on their own when they were ready. One was 14, had braces already, was awarded prizes for not sucking, had s/t added on to her braces to help her stop-no deal. She stopped when she was ready and only then.
Funny thing is, she tries the hardest to stop my youngest from sucking her thumb. She is 6 and only sucks when going to sleep.
Re braces-my only non thumb sucker had the worst teeth and needed braces more than most of his siblings. (though the one who stopped at age 14 actually warped her teeth badly from sucking.)

Mon, Nov 14 2016, 10:32 pm

chani8 wrote:

In OP's case it's not the parents and teachers who are making this a point of shame, but the classmates who realize this child is doing something that only children of lesser value(years) do. Therefore, it is time that parents and teachers help this child so it doesn't affect the self-esteem and friendship. Yes, OP, take care of your child so it doesn't impact his social development. You are doing a great job at parenting and keep it up. Don't listen to people who want to put you down for wanting to help your child so your child doesn't get put down.

amother

Violet

Mon, Nov 14 2016, 11:46 pm

Tzutzie wrote:

I think the teacher meant that she doesn't socialize when shes busy sucking. Ive seen that. Kids end up on the sidelines.

I've seen the same, especially in this age group. I'm a therapist so I'm often in and out of classrooms, and there are occasionally kids who spend a lot of time sucking their thumb and observing the other kids instead of actually playing... Because their hand is not available, and neither is their mouth.

amother

Sienna

Mon, Nov 14 2016, 11:59 pm

amother wrote:

Some of those kids probably need a break from playing with other kids. I know my dd who used to sulk her thumb still likes to sit and read. She has a great time with her friends when she's in the mood, but she has plenty of times when she would rather sit and read than spend time with her friends. As long as she's happy, I'm fine with that. Not everybody is interested in socializing all the time.

Op, from someone who used to suck her thumb and has a child who used to suck her thumb, you have to wait until the child is ready to stop on her own. When I was about 5 or 6, my parents and some of my aunts decided it was time for me to stop sucking my thumb. They all promised me different prizes if I would stop for two weeks. Well, I stopped for two weeks, got my prizes, but within a few weeks I was sucking again.

I remember how guilty I felt to start again after getting all those prizes, but I couldn't help it. I actually started sucking my finger instead of my thumb so that I shouldn't feel so guilty. When I was 11, I finally forced myself to stop.

I just want to mention that my dd who sucked her thumb was amazing about going to sleep. Since she was a baby, I would stick her in her crib, she would stick her thumb in her mouth and go straight to sleep. Once she stopped sucking a few years ago she wasn't able to fall asleep anymore. She can lay in her bed for hours awake. She finally asked me to buy her melatonin, because she felt so helpless. I was always against using melatonin, but once I realized how much it was bothering her I let her use it, and now she can finally fall asleep again.

Notsobusy

Tue, Nov 15 2016, 9:30 am

amother wrote:

For some of us that would be a positive, not a negative. We need some quiet time to just be in our own heads. Maybe it's good for those kids to have a way to relax themselves, I think one of the biggest problems in the preschools in Lakewood is that they cut out nap time. I remember loving nap time in kindergarten. One of my kids would frequently come home from preschool complaining about all the noise, she could have used a little quiet time on the side.

molokai

Tue, Nov 15 2016, 12:40 pm

Our dentist told us that thumb sucking was changing the shape of our child's mouth and had a solution. My child was so old it was embarrassing. The orthodontist glued a bar between my child's back molars which made it nearly impossible to seal the lips & suck properly. Nobody could see the bar, it didn't alter speech & my child could still try to suck. A month or so later the dentist removed the bar. It was painless & fairly inexpensive.