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Forum
-> Relationships
-> Giving Gifts
amother
Mustard
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Mon, Jan 02 2017, 8:55 am
flowerpower wrote: | I tip with a full heart. I believe that the rebbes( and teachers) truly deserve it. |
Of course they deserve it. They are wildly underpaid. They deserve to get it in a dignified manner, as part of a paycheck.
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Kugglegirl
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Mon, Jan 02 2017, 10:59 am
amother wrote: | You tip a service provider, but you pay a professional. Would anyone tip her accountant for preparing a nice tax return? Do you give money to your doctor as thanks for healing a broken leg? It would be insulting.
We should pay teachers, male and female, respectable salaries. Tipping them is demeaning. Not to mention (as I have above) that it can lead to treating students according to their parents' means. |
I totally agree with this. All of it!
I've learned that it is the custom to give these monetary gifts in the frum world, and while I vacillate over actually giving them, for the reason mentioned above--as a professional educator, I believe that that it demeans the professional nature of teaching profession, I lately tend to give something as it is the common practice and in my community it is done in a more respectful way than described by others here.
Calling this practice "tipping" is an indication that people see the teachers and rebbes as service providers, akin to hairdressers, waiters, and car park valets.
I've also learned that trying to change the longstanding habits and perceptions in this community often amounts to "tilting at windmills" (a reference that many will not get in this forum either) & try to pick my battles in the arena of making positive changes in our communal culture and practice.
It is worthwhile to have this discussion here. If possible in our own communities we should stand up to advocate for professional salaries, and a more respectful way of giving holiday bonuses or gifts to teachers and other staff in the schools.
I applaud you, amother, for standing up and speaking out.
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