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Forum -> Parenting our children -> School age children
Some Bedwetting Chizuk, Please!!



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amother
Natural


 

Post Wed, Jan 18 2017, 12:51 pm
After reading the many posts about bedwetting in all ages and stages, I just need some chizuk. My mother thinks my 9 yr old DS should be taken to speak to a psychologist about why he is still bedwetting sometimes twice a night! We are re-trying Dr. Sagie's method after waiting 3 months from the last time. It's just so frustrating and I wonder if he's ever going to get over this!! Please send some support my way!
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amother
Burlywood


 

Post Wed, Jan 18 2017, 1:00 pm
If he has never been dry then it is likely to be a physical issue rather than a psychological issue. Bedwetting is indicative of a psychological issue more when a child is dry for a while and then starts wetting again.

IME there are lots of things you can try - alarms, bribe charts, doctors, medication -and it is important to try all of these to show your son you care. But in the end he will just grow out of it even though it could take a while yet. Hatzlacha!
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amother
Pearl


 

Post Wed, Jan 18 2017, 1:13 pm
Would it support you to hear that I bedwetted til I was a teenager?

No amount of therapy helped me. I refused to talk with anyone about something so shameful.

My parents woke me in middle of the night, took me to the bathroom, etc. And I still woke up wet....

When my child bedwetted, I made no big-deal about it. Just wrapped her mattress in vinyl and she learned to change her clothes when she woke up wet. She stopped bedwetting way earlier than I did, and c'be that's because I did not create any drama around it and trusted her to take care of herself. I allowed it to be HER business, not mine. And often, she would ask me to help remove her wet clothes, and I helped her with all the tenderness one would have for a newborn baby. I think the experience of being supported rather than criticized helped end the bedwetting saga sooner rather than later.
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happy mommy6




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jan 18 2017, 1:27 pm
I also have 9 year old son who need wets.
Spoken to pediatrician many times and he said he'll out grow it.
Give him pull ups. ...makes it so much less stressful! Iyh he will oUT grow real soon!
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amother
Beige


 

Post Wed, Jan 18 2017, 1:45 pm
Bedwetting at age 9 is totally normal (assuming he's never been able to stay dry at night). There tends to be a genetic component to bedwetting. My father was a bedwetter as a child and several of my brothers and I were all bedwetters, until age 8-11, depending on the child. My husband also bedwetted until about age 12. Two of our children are still bedwetting. Several nephews as well. We don't make an issue about it. They wear pullups or drynites and change into underpants in the morning. Since we don't fuss about it, those children arent bothered by it at all and know that they will outgrow it at some point.

Good luck!
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amother
Ivory


 

Post Wed, Jan 18 2017, 10:17 pm
Add me to the list of people unconcerned about a 9 y-o bedwetting DS! Actually, he doesn't wet the bed--he just wears a Goodnite. He isn't very bothered by it, and neither am I, as I know my brothers outgrew it eventually (probably between 10 and 12).

If you have your son wear Goodnites you'll eliminate the drama and aggravation of actual bedwetting.
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amother
Ruby


 

Post Wed, Jan 18 2017, 10:42 pm
So hard for me too! I once sent my son overnight to a sister in law and when she saw a pamper in his bag, she gave me such a look, like why don't I do anything about it. Anyway,
Hardest part is that ds denies everything! If he wets his bed he won't even wake me or want to change. He sleeps so deep, that by the time it's morning he's dry and will say ahhhh I never wet my bed! And will not let me put on any kind of pamper or pull-up. I have to remember to do it when he's asleep.
And he's pretty much ashamed from his younger siblings who sometimes mock him. How do I comfort him? Say that bunch of other kids are also wetting?? Feel so bad for him.
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cnc




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jan 18 2017, 10:47 pm
Why wouldn't you take him to a urologist?
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odchai




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jan 19 2017, 4:21 am
Hi,
So I took him to the dr and we checked to see that he didn't have an infection and we took him for an ultrasound to make sure all his plumbing was working properly and there are no problems there. The dr thinks his bladder needs to stretch more to hold the urine longer which is something that he will learn to work on with time. The dr was not so worried. DS does not mind wearing a diaper and he was the youngest in the family for 6 years before the baby came along. But he has never been dry even when he was 3, 4, 5. Mostly my DH is worried about it and we try all sorts of motivational charts and make him all kinds of promises but nothing has worked so far. The most he's been was dry for maybe 1 week at a time.
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amother
Indigo


 

Post Thu, Jan 19 2017, 4:54 am
Didn't work for my child but some kind of alternative treatment can often help. Kinesiology-type sessions (one-brain, etc)
Dr Sagie also didn't help for us. But suddenly, started being dry at age 13, after giving up on Dr. Sagie.

On a more spiritual level, My neighbor (and mentor for many child caring issues) reminded me to always say 'asher yatzar' with kavana. And that your kid should. Even after being wet at night. Reminds us that everything is from Hashem, and to appreciate what we have.
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amother
Ruby


 

Post Thu, Jan 19 2017, 2:17 pm
A visit to the eurologist is needed only when child wets during the day as well. That shows a bladder problem. Bedwetting is rather the brain not sending signals to the bladder, rather than having a weak bladder.
I just read about a 12 yo girl who was told to drink tons by day and urinate frequently so to strengthen her bladder. For her it helped with the bedwetting.
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amother
Ivory


 

Post Fri, Jan 20 2017, 10:45 am
2 options that can help, if you don't want to wait until he does it on his own:
1. Ask his dr. for a prescription for DDAVP, a medicine taken at night that reduces urine production
2. Try a bedwetting alarm, which he clips to his underwear at night and it rings when it becomes damp. This can work if you and he are motivated (at the beginning, you will have to wake him up to go to the bathroom when you hear the alarm ring).

Good luck!
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amother
Oak


 

Post Fri, Jan 20 2017, 2:35 pm
Just stay calm, I sure its frustrating, just show him so me love and support, he will eventually outgrow it.
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thanks




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Jan 21 2017, 8:01 pm
My son did this too until about 11yrs. When he went to camp he took DDAVP. No need to worry if the Dr. is not concerned.
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odchai




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jan 22 2017, 4:11 pm
Thanks everybody for your help and advice. It sure is frustrating even though I know he's still on the young side. We did try the spray (more than once) and it did NOTHING for him. He still continued to wet. And now we doing an alarm/pad arrangement (also done before with dismal results) and are hoping for the best. In the meantime he is wetting at least twice a night and I am finding it hard to continue smiling about it.
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