Communities in NJ/OOTish

amother

Blush

Thu, Feb 16 2017, 12:09 pm

Hi! I hope some of you anonymous women can help me over here.

We are a young family living in a smallish OOT community somewhere in USA. We originally moved out here from Lakewood a few years ago. Our oldest child is in preschool. If you like to label, then we best fit into "Yeshivish" category (I HATE those labels).

We love our current community. My husband and I are both on the quiet side, but are integral people here due to the small size and are both very involved. We have made lots of friends from different backgrounds and we love that our children are living where there is no "one way is right." There is very little materialism here and we love the lack of competition. Social status has a lot less value here.

That said, we were just offered a fantastic job opportunity back in Lakewood. We were so happy to get out of there and the thought of moving back fills us with dread. However, the opportunity may be too good to pass on.

Which communities with a short commute to Lakewood may work for us? We preferably do not want to raise our children with the Lakewood mindset, so anywhere where we would need to send to Lakewood schools is out. Any community with not too long of a commute where we can get something similar to what we currently have in our OOT community?

doctorima

Thu, Feb 16 2017, 12:45 pm

Probably Edison is your best bet. It's not a short commute, but it's the closest option with its own schools and a fairly yeshivish, yet not overly materialistic crowd. Some people commute from Passaic, but that's a little farther. You could also consider living in Staten Island, from where you could commute to Lakewood but send your kids to school either in Staten Island or possibly Brooklyn.

amother

Chartreuse

Thu, Feb 16 2017, 1:25 pm

I know a few people from Manalapan and my impression is that it is mainly chabad and lubavitch. There are kids who come from that community to bring their boys to Lakewood schools each day.
For those that Lakewood is not a good fit they send to Edison or Deal.

amother

Pearl

Thu, Feb 16 2017, 1:35 pm

There are two orthodox synagogues in Manalapan which are definitely not Chabad, Jewish Learning Center (I think they are affiliated with a kollel) and Union Hill Congregation. People in the area describe the shuls as leaning to the right.

amother

Indigo

Thu, Feb 16 2017, 1:42 pm

okay, I know this isn't what you want to hear. There are lovely people here and nice schools too.

And I say this as someone who does live in Lakewood and wishes I could leave (can't for job reasons...)

If you set yourselves up for a commute, especially as your children get older, you may be missing out on a lot of time with them. Lakewood certainly has its shortcomings, but if you need to move for a job, well there are worse things in life than living here. At the end of the day, being with your family is really really important. I'm sure you thought of this, just wanted to put it out there again as your kids are young but they grow up fast and need you more and more as they get older!