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How to nicely let cleaning lady go
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ra_mom




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Mar 02 2017, 6:41 pm
octopus wrote:
My position can be terminated in a moment's notice, and I don't get a week's pay if that happens. I'm all for treating cleaning help nicely (I even pay my cleaning lady on days that I cancel- even though in my own field if I don't work, I don't get paid), but severance pay? I think that is too much. I once had a very bad cleaner, and I told I simply could not afford to have help. My thoughts were : I cannot afford to have lousy help. I thanked her and paid her (for that day) and that was that.

Sub contractor?
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familyfirst




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Mar 02 2017, 7:20 pm
I'd be careful giving advance notice that you will be firing her. If she knows it's her last day on the job there is more of a risk of her taking something (stealing).
Then again, I may be paranoid especially since she knows you can always find her at mil.
Something to think about...
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cm




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Mar 02 2017, 7:50 pm
Agree with above about not giving her notice. This is why I recommend giving a week's pay rather than having her back "one last time."

As a professional, I can be fired without notice, and am expected to give four weeks' notice if resigning. Neither really applies with domestic help. It is reasonable to assume that the domestic worker is less financially secure, and it would be cruel to let her go without a small severance to help her get through the week. If she is moving or something like that, it would be nice if she gave notice before stopping work, but if she is leaving (whether voluntarily or otherwise) under less-ideal circumstances, you don't want her in your house.
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tigerwife




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Mar 02 2017, 8:58 pm
Severance pay is nice, but I highly doubt this woman is depending on OP for livelihood if her monthly income is less than $50 a month.

I would have her come the last time, pay what is owed, and tell her you appreciate her services but you will no longer be requiring them. Thank you and have a wonderful day, and good luck. No more detail or explanation necessary.

It is never pleasant to fire someone, no matter how much money or chocolate you give as consolation.
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amother
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Post Thu, Mar 02 2017, 10:07 pm
Those of you who are saying it is better to have her one last time... Why? Do you still think this is important if I am paying her a full $50 (more than she earns in any one day with me) extra? I feel like I am giving her more notice this way...

It is actually worse for me to have her clean one last time. I need to start interviewing new people if I am letting her go, and the easiest way for me to "interview" is to have someone for a day to work... If she is currently working, or just did do whole house, I can't do that. So I'd rather pay and have her NOT come.

Also, once I've told her I'd like to stop, honestly it's kind of awkward.

Answer to question: My MIL likes her because she is nice. Which she is. The things that bother me don't bother her as much, possibly because I am living with several little kids and a husband who leave things around and create discord and having a cleaning lady do the same thing just puts me over the edge. Perhaps also she has a greater mess tolerance than I do. Or even a greater dirt tolerance. I don't know. We've discussed. Or maybe she's just a nicer person than me.

And to clarify: I pay her $10 an hr, and she usually comes for 4-4.5 hr each week. So she's usually making between $160-$180 monthly from me.
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notshanarishona




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Mar 02 2017, 10:16 pm
How long has she been working for you?
There is a difference of firing a worker of several months vs a year or 2..
If she has been working for you for a while, basic menshlichkite is either 2 weeks notice or bonus to cover a couple weeks of work.
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amother
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Post Thu, Mar 02 2017, 10:31 pm
She has been working for us for just about 19 months.

So you think it's okay if I give her two weeks extra? What I owe her from last week, PLUS $100? Seems like a lot but I would do it if it's the right thing to do. I wish I could have her then come and do that work, or other work (there's plenty of work to do here!), but honestly it might be easier for both of us to just not.
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greenfire




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Mar 02 2017, 11:18 pm
do whatever you want to do ... just not at another person's house or without prior notice - I thought you had her several times a week for 2 years

if you want to call her up now & say no mas trabajo then stop going back & forth then just do it & well before the next cleaning day

really it's right before pesach & she will be grabbed up for work in the blink of an eye - most cleaning ladies are running to the highest bidder [see what I learn from imamother Wink ]
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WhatFor




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Mar 02 2017, 11:20 pm
I think you're a kind and generous person. I don't think you need to have her come one last time, especially if you're paying her for that time anyway, just not having her clean. I do think you should give her advance notice (as soon as possible) that you won't be needing her and arrange a place to pick up the money. This gives both of you more time to move on faster.
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Ruchel




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Mar 03 2017, 7:00 am
No chocolates (??).
I'd tell her unfortunately I can't afford anymore.

And yes you don't have to pay several weeks plus extra dollars. Unless in your country you do.
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lili




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Mar 03 2017, 10:14 am
if she works by other Jewish families she will easily find more work, at least until after Pesach. People get very desperate.
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amother
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Post Fri, Mar 03 2017, 12:13 pm
Thank you all for your advice. Will give a little over 1 "extra" week pay. And do it in my house at her convenience.

I see many denigrating the chocolate. Is money plus chocolate worse than just the money?
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tichellady




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Mar 03 2017, 12:37 pm
amother wrote:
Thank you all for your advice. Will give a little over 1 "extra" week pay. And do it in my house at her convenience.

I see many denigrating the chocolate. Is money plus chocolate worse than just the money?


This is just my opinion so feel free to take it or leave it. I feel like chocolate is something you give to your office on your last day of work (assuming you left on good terms) or when you come back from a vacation and you want to thank everyone for picking up slack while you were gone, or to your housekeeper for her birthday or x-mas but not something you give to someone who you are letting go.
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zaq




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Mar 03 2017, 12:54 pm
tichellady wrote:
This is just my opinion so feel free to take it or leave it. I feel like chocolate is something you give to your office on your last day of work (assuming you left on good terms) or when you come back from a vacation and you want to thank everyone for picking up slack while you were gone, or to your housekeeper for her birthday or x-mas but not something you give to someone who you are letting go.


I agree, unless it's caregiver whose job is ending naturally because your youngest child started school or your dad is going to a nursing home. It's a thank-you, not severance.
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zaq




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Mar 03 2017, 12:58 pm
amother wrote:
Thank you all for your advice. Will give a little over 1 "extra" week pay. And do it in my house at her convenience.

I see many denigrating the chocolate. Is money plus chocolate worse than just the money?


Yes. Because the worker won't see it as "wow, she gave me severance pay and a gift!" She'll see it as "She bought me chocolate with my severance pay. Who needs chocolate, I'd rather have had the twenty bucks to buy what I want. Especially now that I'm out of a job."
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amother
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Post Sun, Mar 05 2017, 6:19 pm
Thank you all for your insight.

So I concluded that I would give just money in a nice card, no chocolate. And just say "I'm sorry I won't be able to hire you anymore," no reason given. And try to arrange a time for me to give her this money that I owe her plus some additional.

Played phone tag with her for a few days. (I did not want to convey this via text.)

Finally got through to her. She is so incredibly nice that I almost have tears in my eyes. All "don't worry" and telling me not to give her money. (Seems that she was possibly even resisting me giving her the amount that I owe her--maybe she wasn't really keeping track and is not aware that I owe her money, or maybe she understood that if I am stopping to hire her it's because I cannot afford to, and so she wants to save me money!!!)

Of course I insisted. It took several minutes of my insistence, including that I talked to her daughter who speaks a better English. Finally we concluded that I'll give it to my MIL to give to her (her suggestion not mine). She still insisted that I not give her a lot. I will give her the same amount I planned to before we talked.

What a kind and special woman.
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amother
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Post Sun, Mar 05 2017, 6:21 pm
She just sent me a text. "Thank you for giving me a job. It is not necessary for you to give me money."

What do you say to that??????
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