Home
Log in / Sign Up
    Private Messages   Advanced Search   Rules   New User Guide   FAQ   Advertise   Contact Us  
Forum -> Inquiries & Offers -> Moving/ Relocating
What age does a move become very difficult for children?



Post new topic   Reply to topic View latest: 24h 48h 72h

chocolatecake




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Apr 22 2017, 9:37 pm
I was thinking that thru fifth grade kids will adjust in a few months to new city and school. What are your thoughts and opinions on the topic...especially if you have experience. I am talking about a state to state move not different country.
Back to top

amother
Natural


 

Post Sat, Apr 22 2017, 9:41 pm
Okay I probably moved more times then anyone from my class and I had anxiety at age five -what???! Yaaaa.
Back to top

amother
Ginger


 

Post Sat, Apr 22 2017, 9:46 pm
I'd agree with that. Between Grade 6 and 8, a change will be very disruptive. Depending on how far or under what circumstances, it could be traumatic or just a tough couple of months. After Grade 9, I actually don't think it's really fair to move kids without their input (I'm talking a big distance, not within a city or surrounds), since it can seriously disrupt schooling, career choices, friendships, relationship prospects, etc.

I moved continents halfway through Grade 8. TRAUMATIC, to say the least. Not to say that I didn't adjust or that I fault my parents, but it was not at all ideal. I had a very rough transition to high school. Any older and I don't think it would have been fair at all.
Back to top

amother
Indigo


 

Post Sat, Apr 22 2017, 11:08 pm
I would say up to about age 10. After that it would be tough on the kids.
Back to top

amother
Smokey


 

Post Sat, Apr 22 2017, 11:15 pm
I moved to a different state, with a very very different community and very different schools with a 3rd, 5th, 7th, and 10th grader.
They all adjusted really well, the beginning was difficult, but about 2 months in, the kids all found friends, got invited, have friends over etc.
They got used to all the differences and we discuss the few things they miss.
Back to top

Stars




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Apr 22 2017, 11:17 pm
I don't think age matters as much as personality and circumstances.
Back to top

FranticFrummie




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Apr 22 2017, 11:18 pm
I'd say ages 11-13 would be the hardest. Anything that coincides with puberty is bound to be a disaster, even with the most even tempered kid.

BTDT. Sad
Back to top

amother
Brunette


 

Post Sun, Apr 23 2017, 1:12 am
Younger is better, but some 5 year olds will be stressed out and some 15 year olds will be totally fine. A lot depends on the child's personality, but there are other factors too. How are the parents adjusting? Is the new place culturally similar to the old? What is the school like? Physical realities - climate, house size, etc.

Good luck
Back to top

Ruchel




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 23 2017, 6:59 am
I think it's more about culture and language change than per se moving. But younger is better. Or older if they're really ok with it not only in theory but in practice daily life!!
Back to top

little_mage




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 23 2017, 9:44 am
I think a lot depends on the kids. My parents moved me halfway across the country (midwest to eastern seaboard) when I was 17; my senior year of high school was at a new school. I dealt with it just fine. I don't feel like it ruined my life or anything, although I was really upset at the time. I was old enough to understand why we were moving-my father had been out of work for the previous three years, so when he found a job-well, that was that. On the other hand, my sister was 13/14, and started high school in the new city. For her, it was probably the best time possible to move, because the high school drew from a bunch of different middle schools, so it was pretty much new for her whole class.
Back to top

amother
Lavender


 

Post Sun, Apr 23 2017, 3:40 pm
I moved with a 6 yr oldfrom city to suburb and it was a disaster. This child suffered greatly. I never would have anticipated it being so hard for him. It was an extremely bigchange culturally. Different type of school and he needed to learn English were previously he was primarily a Yiddish speaking kid.

Till today it hurts. But he's doing better he went to a different school that's more his crowd and type. Still struggles but better bh'

You can never know. Every child is different and you need to know how your child deals with changes altogether.

If you sent your child away fro a few days how would they take the change? These are questions you need to ask yourself
Back to top

MagentaYenta




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 23 2017, 3:47 pm
Stars wrote:
I don't think age matters as much as personality and circumstances.


Exactly, each child and family is unique. We moved when DD was 7, total change of lifestyle and location at the same time her older sisters had fledged the nest. It was just a new adventure for her, she was a flexible child. Children all react differently.
Back to top

Iymnok




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 23 2017, 3:54 pm
Ideally, try o be permanent by first grade. If not then, then before puberty.
I know a family that was living in the us, but constantly talking about moving to Israel. When they finally did, their oldest was almost bas mitzvah and they adjusted pretty well. But they grew up expecting it.
Back to top

amother
Powderblue


 

Post Sun, Apr 23 2017, 5:24 pm
I moved to a different country , different language with 2 children aged 8 and 4. My 8 year old took it very easy. 4 year old changed school when she was 6. That change was hard for her but now they're both so happy here and it sounds like they were born here (language wise)
Socially the older one had it easier . His class was so nice to him. First day they all got him welcome cards and little presents. It all depends how the teacher does it...
Back to top

Rubber Ducky




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 23 2017, 8:02 pm
Natural break points work well if you can control the timing. We moved across the country when DS#1 was starting high school. Because he was going to be going to a dorm yeshiva anyway, the timing worked perfectly for him. Our younger son was entering 4th grade — no special timing there — but he integrated easily into his new school.
Back to top
Page 1 of 1 Recent Topics




Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum -> Inquiries & Offers -> Moving/ Relocating

Related Topics Replies Last Post
Clean library books for age 13 14 Today at 2:50 pm View last post
Outdoor sensory table for older children
by amother
0 Today at 11:44 am View last post
Questions for published children books authors
by amother
2 Today at 9:23 am View last post
How to teach children not to talk to strangers
by amother
4 Yesterday at 3:49 pm View last post
Please don't bring babies or young children to megillah
by dena613
166 Mon, Mar 25 2024, 5:43 pm View last post