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-> Household Management
amother
Chocolate
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Tue, May 09 2017, 9:25 am
amother wrote: | I have a female cleaning lady who is always home alone with my husband. Nothing to do with my paranoia. We asked a shayla how we can work around it and go based on that. |
Could you please clarify what this entails ("how we can work around it and go based on that")?
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amother
Magenta
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Tue, May 09 2017, 12:24 pm
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imasoftov
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Tue, May 09 2017, 1:58 pm
amother wrote: | Its no different than going to a strip with non jews. |
Is it better or worse if one goes with Jews or by oneself?
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Hashem_Yaazor
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Tue, May 09 2017, 6:01 pm
yOungM0mmy wrote: | That's why there are halachos of yichud which apply regardless of age or beauty, but you do not need to go above and beyond what halacha dictates and say you'll never hire a female housekeeper in case your husband is ever home alone with her for a little while. As I said above and marina posted the source, if it's not your regular schedule and you are coming home soon and they both know it, halacha says you're fine. Taking it further than that is your own paranoia or recognising your personal situation, but has nothing to do with halacha. |
No, Marina posted one halachic view. Not a source that everyone agrees with. It's also from years back and societal norms may have changed regarding pesach pasuach.
Last edited by Hashem_Yaazor on Tue, May 09 2017, 6:16 pm; edited 1 time in total
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mommy3b2c
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Tue, May 09 2017, 6:03 pm
amother wrote: | I didn't ask you how to keep halachot. But I love you anyway |
I didn't say anything about Halacha.
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mommy3b2c
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Tue, May 09 2017, 6:06 pm
amother wrote: | The laws of yichud apply to everyone so there is clearly room for concern. I used to think old and fat and ugly would be a great deterrent but then I found out my 25 year old husband was viewing the profiles of 70 year old women online and I realized that doesn't help at all. Yes, he is sick and supposedly most aren't like him but halacha wasn't only made up for sickos or addicts it was made for everyone for a reason. Access leads to temptation. He may not choose her in the street but if she's in his house and he's desperate he may go for it. She may even agree because he is her boss. Oh, and what about "al ta'amin be'atzmecha ad yom moscha" (don't believe in yourself until the day of your death)? None of us are better than that and can fully trust we'll never fall and sin. |
I am not talking about Halacha. If my husbands home with the cleaning lady, I would unlock the door or whatever the Halacha is. But I wouldn't be worried about him having s-x with her. Even if she was the most gorgeous woman out there. (She happens to be nice looking). I trust him. So sad that som many women don't.
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