Would you leave your kids with a 12 year old for two hours

amother

Burlywood

Wed, Jul 12 2017, 8:36 pm

penguin wrote:

Quote:

Why is everyone anonymous here?

Afraid of a DYFS investigation, I think.

Where I live, I'm actually quite positive that the legal age is 12+

Why am I anonymous? I guess because everyone else here is so adamant that it's a terrible idea...

amother

Scarlet

Wed, Jul 12 2017, 8:39 pm

penguin wrote:

Quote:

12 year old very baporet son

I know it's autocorrect, but what could it have been? And what does it mean now? Google seems to think it's a foreign word.

I'm definitely on the side of ok if neighbors are home & willing to cover.

Bapuret means 'handles it well'.
Marina; we are anonymous because we're afraid from the cops Wink

Eta didn't see penguin suggested the CPS already...
I babysat at 9 if that helps. DON'T do it without knowing the child! I was petrified and would not handle any emergency well.
The issue wasn't so much my age but rather that my mother didn't know of/appreciate differences. Every child 'had to' do everything. Fit for it, or not.

amother

Blush

Wed, Jul 12 2017, 10:40 pm

marina wrote:

I would sure, depending on the 12 year old

Why is everyone anonymous here?

I'm only anonymous because I said the bit about my parents leaving us home alone when the oldest was seven. Don't want family members to start figuring out who I am. (I hope not too many parents did that!)

ramateshkolmom

Thu, Jul 13 2017, 7:15 am

Eh... I think 12 is a bit too young. Not crazy if shes very capable AND the kids stay sleeping AND you're staying local...... but otherwise ii think its probably too young.
good luck! Its so hard finding babysitters!

Ruchel

Thu, Jul 13 2017, 7:55 am

Everyone is anonymous because it's a helicopter parenting contest on Imamother. Thankfully we have no law. Yes I would, for the right 12 year old.

abound

Thu, Jul 13 2017, 8:15 am

yes I would, depending on the 12 year old and the younger kids personality.
I addition I would notify an adult in the building or the next one that we are going out and we will call them if there is an emergency.

Last edited by abound on Thu, Jul 13 2017, 8:23 am; edited 1 time in total

Stars

Thu, Jul 13 2017, 8:23 am

Depends on the 12 year old, the younger kids (a wild two year old, no way) and where I was going. And I'd make sure there is a neighbor who would be there in case of emergency.

FranticFrummie

Thu, Jul 13 2017, 11:29 am

The laws go state by state, and vary widely. It can also depend on whether it's day or night, for how long, etc. There's no consistency, so you need to Google it. CVS, if anything should happen, no matter minor, make sure that you are within the law, or you could be facing charges of endangerment.

It also really depends on your kid's personalities. If one wakes up screaming from a nightmare, and wakes up the other 2, will the 12yo know what to do?

A responsible 12yo from a large family will probably know exactly how to soothe the kids. A 12yo who is the youngest in the family and doesn't have a lot of experience might panic.

Chayalle

Thu, Jul 13 2017, 11:35 am

amother wrote:

I babysat at 9 if that helps. DON'T do it without knowing the child! I was petrified and would not handle any emergency well.
The issue wasn't so much my age but rather that my mother didn't know of/appreciate differences. Every child 'had to' do everything. Fit for it, or not.

So did I.

Some time ago someone called to ask my 15 year old DD to babysit. DD wasn't available, so then she asked if my 9 year old DD could babysit. shock

sweetpotato

Thu, Jul 13 2017, 11:39 am

I would, if it was a mature and responsible 12 year old who had babysitting experience, access to a landline phone at home for emergencies, and CPR and emergency training from a Red Cross class or the like. (That's what I did when I started babysitting around 11-12).

littleprincess

Thu, Jul 13 2017, 1:23 pm

I sometimes leave my children with my very mature almost 13 year old ds. But only if I am local. Local wedding (hall 3 mins drive) popping in to engagement or shopping.
He is very good with my younger children (1 and 3 ) and they're usually asleep
I wouldn't leave him alone when he's asleep cos he wouldn't hear the little ones waking up
He calls us when he needs something (which is usually asking us for a treat )

Ruchel

Thu, Jul 13 2017, 1:26 pm

In a certain shul camp, only the head mora seemed above 12. I only left my daughter there one morning but not because of the ages (the locals were hot and generally awful).

Simple1

Thu, Jul 13 2017, 1:28 pm

I'm not sure, but you got a good variety of answers to help you.

Just make sure that she doesn't feel pressured to babysit. My daughters at that age were not ready to babysit - but were still sometimes pressured by mothers who were desperate. I think in that case it is not safe. The girl should be ready and willing.

eschaya

Thu, Jul 13 2017, 8:21 pm

The fire code laws in my state list13 yo as the recommended age for a babysitter to watch children under the age of 8.
That being said, there have been few times this past year when I've left 12 yo dd (she'll be 13 in 2 months, can't wait!) with my 5 yo, but only when she felt comfortable. It helps that we live in a townhouse with frum next door neighbors and dd knows that if she needs anything, to either call or go over to the neighbors. I also will always leave my cell phone on.
So in an ideal situation I'd hire a 13 yo to just sit in the house (and let dd put her younger brothers to sleep anyway), but when the babysitter cancels, or I need to run out for a short while, I have left my 5 yo under her care. (I also have a 9 and 11 yo boy, but they are legally allows to remain home themselves acc to the fire code).