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Forum -> Parenting our children
Come join the "talking gently club"



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amother
Turquoise


 

Post Tue, Sep 26 2017, 9:47 pm
Just heard the most inspiring shiur

ETA updated repaired link

http://download2.yutorah.org/2.....0.MP3

It's only 20 minutes, based on this

http://www.angelfire.com/ny/of......html

Any one want to join me?
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OutATowner




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Sep 26 2017, 10:06 pm
This seems like something I would like to do but cannot listen to it until tomorrow. I will be back!
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amother
Rose


 

Post Tue, Sep 26 2017, 10:10 pm
Could you check the link? I can't get it to work.
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amother
Cerise


 

Post Tue, Sep 26 2017, 10:34 pm
unfortunately I cannot open the link.
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yitel




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Sep 26 2017, 11:45 pm
I’m ready. Couldn’t listen though
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amother
Turquoise


 

Post Wed, Sep 27 2017, 1:51 am
Trying again with the link

http://download2.yutorah.org/2.....0.MP3

I think it will work this time.

If not go to yutorah.org/mobile and type in "anger" to the search engine. It's the fourth shiur on the list, by R Eisenstein.

The few hours since I listened to it have been amazing- I have not been triggered by my kids witching hour tantrums. He basically learns from the Iggeret HaRamban, that

1. Read the Iggeret once a week
2. Accustom yourself to speak quietly to all people at all times

I thought I would try to do this.

He says it's a segula to not get angry. He doesn't say this but it is clearly a segula like "having a job" is a segula for parnassa.

I thought maybe we could encourage each other. I've had one (partial, but it still counts) quiet day, and I haven't even read the Iggeret yet.

I liked the shiur because I'm always trying to "not get angry", and that is too hard.

Somehow just "talking quietly" was an easier goal to achieve , well at least so far, for a few hours. Wink

Have a listen / read, tell me what you think, and let's encourage each other.
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cinnamon




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Sep 27 2017, 4:47 am
I'm in!
I will bli neder speak softly every day between five and seven pm.
I have set a reminder on my phone.
Also I will do my best to read the igeret haramban every shabbos.
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amother
Turquoise


 

Post Wed, Sep 27 2017, 5:09 pm
Hello everyone
How is everyone going today? Could you open the links?
Cinnamon I quite like it 2 hour plan for anyone who thinks it is too hard.

So far my day is going well.

I have had a little look at the start of the Iggeret. So what it actually says is to accustom oneself to speak "benachat", which I translated above as "quietly". It's not a good translation, better would be "gently". So first thing I was thinking is that the title of this thread is not very gentle. So I'm going to try to change it now to "The Talking Gently Club" or something like that. I'm not sure if it will just change this thread, or come up as a separate thread. If it is separate, maybe we could direct all future replies under that heading.

Anyway I'd like to know

How are you going?
Is this helping?
Any good tips for us all?
Anything else you have learned?

Thank you so much!
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rzab




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Sep 28 2017, 3:38 pm
I'm having issues downloading it. What was the title of the shiur? maybe I'll have an easier time if I go directly onto yutorah.

btw, I am a huge fan of r' eisenstein, so thanks for sharing
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amother
Turquoise


 

Post Thu, Sep 28 2017, 5:31 pm
Sorry the link is working. (it is for me).

The shiur is called

Ten Minute Mussar: Speaking softly - the antidote to Anger

by R Chaim Eisenstein.

So do we have anyone on board? I so impressed with what's happening for me these past couple of days. The King is definitely in His field and is helping me. I'm catching myself when I'm STARTING to raise my voice, and just stopping. It's shameful how many times this is happening each day though.

But it is very simple and very practical.

Hopefully we can all go from strength to strength.
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mumofthree




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Sep 28 2017, 9:52 pm
I am looking forward to join. Gonna get a translated igeres haramban and plan to start after sukkos iyh. Thanks for sharing! G'mar chasima tova!
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yitel




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Sep 29 2017, 12:22 am
I find that I need to focus on lowering my volume more than watching what I say. Somehow we talk too loudly especially at dinner when everyone is trying to talk about their day. I get a migraine sometimes from the Kids squeaky high pitched voices and keep telling them to lower their volume. I realize my volume is on a high as well and I actually started speaking more quietly to get them to tone down.
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amother
Turquoise


 

Post Fri, Sep 29 2017, 12:37 am
I can totally relate, yitel.

Very typical of me to yell "can you all BE QUIET".

Well it was, but not anymore. iyH.

Were you able to open the link?

And for whoever asked there is a link to the iggeret in English in the OP.
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