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Forum -> Household Management
3 kids.is your house always clean and NEAT?
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amother
Chartreuse


 

Post Thu, Feb 22 2018, 3:22 pm
Are you a SAHM? Maybe she’s comparing you to others she knows who have a similar Home life situation.
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amother
Cerise


 

Post Thu, Feb 22 2018, 3:39 pm
yentee wrote:
Beds not made and Kids making a mess are 2 different things. Yes your beds should me made in the morning and the dishes in dink washed (unless they were just used for something) . And yes otherwise it all makes sense for a healthy home. But beds not made?!


Not everyone makes beds. I grew up in a home where beds were made every day (by the maid) and when I got married... my husband said - that's what bedroom doors are for. To be closed.
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ra_mom




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Feb 22 2018, 3:41 pm
No way. Depends on the day of the week, the time of the day...
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amother
Ruby


 

Post Thu, Feb 22 2018, 3:48 pm
3 kids under 6. NO WAY is it neat all the time. and it can happen that parts are not even clean (for a rather short period of time). last week ds threw up while baby was held having fever and I was alone. well obviously I cleaned the vomit while baby yelled (because I had to put her down for 5 minutes), I took care of ds (washing him, offering water etc)...toddler decided it is a great time to throw our entire lego collection on the floor- basically everywhere. so what exactly was I supposed to handle first? cleaning up vomit, holding baby, educating toddler about messes, preparing supper, calling the doc???

obviously the lego mess was the least of my problems...the neighbour knocked right then and asked for some vinegar. I FELT SO EMBARASSED, but she was so nice about the mess and offered to send me over some pasta for supper. what an angel!!!!

she has older kids but she seems to remember how life is when kids are young.
yes im usually well organised, try to have little clutter and really try hard to clean up every night when kids are asleep. so very often my house is neat and clean. but all the time??? HAHAHAHA NOOOO WAY!!!
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amother
Lavender


 

Post Thu, Feb 22 2018, 4:07 pm
yentee wrote:
Beds not made and Kids making a mess are 2 different things. Yes your beds should me made in the morning and the dishes in dink washed (unless they were just used for something) . And yes otherwise it all makes sense for a healthy home. But beds not made?!


Just say b"h that you have a well regulated brain to make beds. Not everyone pulls themselves together to make beds.
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agreer




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Feb 22 2018, 4:15 pm
OMG... I visited a friend down the block yesterday... She has a few kids ages baby-8 and her house is SPOTLESS and organized like crazy. I felt so bad about myself as I left, returning to my "lived-in" house.
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amother
Babypink


 

Post Thu, Feb 22 2018, 4:22 pm
Im not a SAHM ...I work in the morning and afternooon I stay home, yentee who said about the beds ..maybe you are right, its something I wanna try doing this year ...but for me is soooo hard bc im not a morning person, and mornings here usually are só stressful that I end up not doing it...but its something I wanna work on doing.
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SuperWify




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Feb 22 2018, 4:29 pm
It’s clean, yes.

Always neat? Nope!

I have one kid.

With theee I will be lucky if it’s going to be even clean... forget about neat....
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amother
Bronze


 

Post Thu, Feb 22 2018, 4:35 pm
Op, don't feel bad about the beds. Of all the things in life to work on, that one ranks pretty low. I never saw the point of making beds. I've never made a bed in my life and probably never will.
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pause




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Feb 22 2018, 4:56 pm
yentee wrote:
Beds not made and Kids making a mess are 2 different things. Yes your beds should me made in the morning and the dishes in dink washed (unless they were just used for something) . And yes otherwise it all makes sense for a healthy home. But beds not made?!

You got it right! Beds not made. When I have an extra few minutes to tidy the house, I make beds, but very often I choose to not do it. I simply don't see the supreme importance of doing it. It's not like laundry or dishes that if you don't do it, just piles up, making your job harder later. If I don't make it, I do so right before I/the kids go to sleep.

Judge away.
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Tzutzie




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Feb 22 2018, 5:26 pm
amother wrote:
Important point to remember:

You are not someone else. And somelses kids are not yours. Different, makeup, different genes, different DNA. If your SIL and MIL can keep a house always organized so be it.

As a side note, out of our children only one was able to remember to bring home notes, do homework and not lose sweaters. My sister tortured me about my not being strict enough. (Her kids were blessed with regulated organized but oh so boring brains.) Very organized, regulated appropriate people can be the most shallow people and the people with so little depth. Recently, one of my daughter's teacher called complaining about my daughters disorganization. I told her: this is the way she was created by G_d, this is the way she will always be. I can help her organize, I can give her skills. But she has to remain who she is
If the teacher will convey displeasure she'll get more stressed and more disorganized.

When the teacher disagreed, I asked her if she recommends brain surgery for my daughter.

Sure enough the next day my daughter returned from school happily. She was thrilled that the teacher took a liking to her!!!!
Just be yourself and remember to once in a while to speak up for yourself.


Love this post haha.
So true.

Now at 5:22 (I stole a minute. They are actually talking nicely for a change.....), the front of my house is an disaster.

My kids wouldn't be able to sit if their life dePender on them.
Yesterday, my neighbors kid actually SAT THRU THE ENTIRE 35 MIN SUPPER. Then this morning she played for an hour with maganets. I'm still busy finding my eyeballs to put them back in......


Also, op, do you have a small house/apt?

I find it a LOT harder to clean small places.
Since we moved, I mostly need to clean kitchen dining areas.
Bedrooms are for sleeping, playroom are for playing..... kitchen is were the food and shmutz happens.

Anyway, op, I say accept the generous offer for more cleaning help. With kids it's NEVER enough.

On second thought, can you send her to me??
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anonymrs




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Feb 22 2018, 8:22 pm
I would change the title of the post.

3 kids.is your house ever clean and NEAT?

No.

(I have 2 kids.)
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amother
Fuchsia


 

Post Thu, Feb 22 2018, 8:26 pm
I like to say we have our very own free alarm system. No one can break into our house without anyone knowing. The person will trip and fall on a toy before getting anywhere. Let's just say that the scattered toys are not contained to one area.
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newmom770




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Feb 23 2018, 12:05 am
I never had 6 hrs cleaning help so I don't know. I think the neat people of the world are very judgy. Like everyone has to be like them or they are horrified and grossed out.
But what if a neat home is like art. There is a wide range of artistic abilities. Only a limited amount if people are top level artists. And for those who have no skill or talent in that area, so they don't. Do people shame them for it, offer to pay for them to have lessons?

It's so much work, some people are more willing than others to put in so much time. Some people have more energy than others. Some people have other priorities.

There are many people whose houses are not neat and not clean plenty of times through the day/week. It's normal. Your sister in law just doesn't know. I'm sure many ladies walking into your home here would have thought to themselves that you keep your house neat and you are on top of things more than they are.

So to summarise - the state of your house is VERY normal and appropriate.
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FranticFrummie




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Feb 23 2018, 6:19 am
observer wrote:
OF COURSE NOT!!!!! And it shouldn't be!!!!!!!!!!

Kids are kids. If I see a house of little kids that is perfectly neat, well that would concern me.


I have a friend who is a social worker for CPS. She told me that a perfectly clean house where there are little kids is a Red Flag. It makes her wonder if the kids are being overcontrolled, or are ever allowed to play.

She likes to see some toys on the floor, a blanket on the sofa, and a sippy cup on a side table. If a house looks "normal-lived in" it's much healthier.
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