What is "a harry"?

Tamiri

Sat, Feb 02 2008, 11:33 am

While the yeshiva is "out of town", we don't know whether to boy dorms. That in itself can go a long way towards causing a personality change in an adolescent. Also, it can go a long way towards the family not knowing what the heck is going on with the child.
I wonder why the father chose to write to Yated.

mummiedearest

Sun, Feb 03 2008, 1:14 am

having been called a "harriet" by my own brothers, I can define the term for you-- anything from not mainstream yeshivish to on the verge of yeshivish, but not quite qualifying as yeshivish. my brothers got very serious about learning when they were in high school, and by comparison I was (and still am) a harriet. and proud of it, thank you. I approve of men working and holding a learning seder and having some hobby just for relaxation purposes.
and I dress casual. I respect their need to learn full time, but I still wish they would learn a trade in case their wives need their financial support in the future. chinuch doesn't pay much. but that's another discussion.

I had a good laugh when I saw this thread title...

red sea

Sun, Feb 03 2008, 9:39 am

Is the word in websters yet? Let me understand "harry" is a name used derogatorily to call s/o who is

a) coming from a yeshivish background who has "left" and became JPF (just plain frum)

b) s/o JPF regardless

c) s/o who used to be MO who has neared yeshivish but is still falling into JPF guidlines

or is it

d) the worst option - used only on yeshivish wannabe's to exclude them and not let them "in"

ok, experts, which is it?

red sea

Sun, Feb 03 2008, 9:57 am

So then anyone who is called a 'harry' would be seeing it as a complement then, no? Better set that son and father straight and tell them its a good thing. Its only seen as derogatory to the harry name caller, not to the name callee.

TzenaRena

Sun, Feb 03 2008, 10:04 am

No clue what it really means, but from all the posts trying to explain, it sounds like someone who doesn't fit in, either because he's more frum or less frum than his fellow yeshivah bochurim, or because of other reasons. I can understand this father's distress if his son is considered a misfit or being called one. They would need to get down to the bottom of it and understand exactly why to determine whether it's something serious or not.

He*Sings*To*Me

Sun, Feb 03 2008, 4:33 pm

su7kids wrote:

I dont know, maybe its something to do with Harry Potter? Smart, intelligent, studious?

I'm SO glad I scrolled down the postings and read this, because this is EXACTLY who came to mind...the glasses and studious appearance lend to a stereotypical "nerd"-like image.

Naomi Yoheved

Sun, Feb 03 2008, 8:31 pm

I'm not sure I put my answer on the right line or format, but my 14 years old daughter said she thought a 'harry" might be someone who is of no consequence, not important, blends in to the wall paper sort of, although she says she hasn't ever heard the expression, I thought comming from a 14 year old mind may help?

Naomi Yoheved

Naomi Yoheved

Sun, Feb 03 2008, 8:34 pm

from a parents point of view, this could be a good thing, in the end, not fitting in may be just what is needed?

peach

Sun, Feb 03 2008, 8:55 pm

It's a term used in yeshivas, so you'll get better results by asking a yeshiva bochur! I had no idea what it was until I got married and DH explained it to me...I still don't fully get it, but I pretty much have the picture!

red sea

Sun, Feb 03 2008, 9:05 pm

peach wrote:

so is the picture painted here the same picture as the one you got?

peach

Mon, Feb 04 2008, 5:18 pm

red sea wrote:

peach wrote:

so is the picture painted here the same picture as the one you got?

Some responses more than others. As one person wrote, "someone who carries his seforim in a backpack" is a very good example.

justanothermother

Mon, Feb 04 2008, 5:31 pm

G-d willing, one day my son will be. If I buy him a backpack am I ruining his shidduch chances? Wink

atlastamom

Tue, Feb 12 2008, 5:02 pm

a "harry" does not have anything to do with a level of frumkeit (to my understanding as was explained to me by dh and my brother who is in 10th grade). a "harry" is just someone who is not cool in appearance (nerd). like previous posters said - wearing white socks or carrying around a backpack full of seforim... (not talking about a boy who has a backpack)
I just wanted to defend the people who say it, nothing to do with MO or anything like that. just appearance...